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October 05, 2004

No Laughing Matter: Josh Marshall Wants Carl Cameron Reassigned off Covering Kerry For Writing Parody "Kerry Quotes" in Script

The hysterical left-wing blogosphere thinks they've gotten hold of their own little Rathergate. It seems that Fox reporter Carl Cameron, covering the Kerry campaign, inserted joke-quotes -- obviously parodies -- into a preliminary news-script and those quotes were taken as real by someone on the FoxNews website.

These "Kerry quotes" got posted as real:

"Women should like me! I do manicures."

"Didn't my nails and cuticles look great? What a good debate!"

"I'm metrosexual — [Bush's] a cowboy."

Now, these are obviously fake, as Joshua "I'm working on the story of my life" Marshall immediately realized. And FoxNews immediately realized they were fake, too-- the story was pulled almost immediately and FoxNews has issued a retraction and an apology:

Earlier Friday, FOXNews.com posted an item purporting to contain quotations from Kerry. The item was based on a reporter’s partial script that had been written in jest and should not have been posted or broadcast. We regret the error, which occurred because of fatigue and bad judgment, not malice.

They also "reprimanded" Carl Cameron. A fuller FoxNews explanation can be found here.

The new policy states that no such humorous bits are to be included in any preliminary news script.

Now, how did these obviously-ludicrous "quotes" make it on to the website? FoxNews isn't saying, but there seem to be three possibilities:

1) The person who wrote the story is in fact a functional retard.

2) The person who wrote the story is rabidly-anti-Kerry, so much so as to cloud his sense.

3) The person who wrote the story is, like many of the people who work at FoxNews, a liberal who hates FoxNews and wishes he or she had gotten a better job offer at a more liberal news organization, and posted the story deliberately to embarass FoxNews.

But who knows.

Josh Marshall whines:

[A FoxNews spokesman says] “Carl [Cameron] made a stupid mistake which he regrets. And he has been reprimanded for his lapse in judgment. It was a poor attempt at humor.”
So the Fox reporter covering the Kerry campaign puts together this Kerry-bashing parody right out of the RNC playbook with phony quotes intended to peg him as girlish fool and somehow it found its way on the Fox website as a news item.

Imagine that.

More to follow ...

More to follow? Isn't there always, Joshy?

Joshy wants to get to the bottom of this. He asks:

1. [Re: Cameron's reprimand] How? Are there any consequences? What happened to him? How was he reprimanded? Fox spokesman Paul Schur, who first spoke to TPM yesterday afternoon, told The Daily News "We're simply moving on from this, we have no further comment." And that doesn't inspire a lot of confidence that the 'reprimand' is anything more than a 'Carl, Don't post any more fabricated quotes on the website.' Meanwhile, Schur declined to tell the LA Times what if any discipline Cameron faced.
3. Just for the sake of discussion, can there be any question that Carl Cameron has contempt and disdain for John Kerry -- contempt and disdain that he has great difficulty keeping a lid on?

4. Shouldn't Cameron be taken off the Kerry campaign beat? Assume for the moment that Cameron's fabricated story wasn't supposed to run on the site. If Cameron sits around writing up phony news stories only for Fox News colleagues which portray Kerry as a swishy fool, can he really credibly cover the campaign as a straight news reporter? The answer is obvious, I think. Of course, he can't.

The trouble for Joshy is that this isn't the first time a partisan has been caught inserting snide jokes into a partial script-- or pool report. One of Joshy's favorite reporters, I'm sure-- Dan Milbank of the Washington Post -- had lots of snide anti-Bush "jokes" in a pool report he prepared for the media who could not attend a Bush function.

Milbank repeatedly calls Bush "our protagonist" and "our hero" -- which might be seen as cute and playful coming from a Republican or moderate, but which are definitely insulting coming from a rabidly-partisan Bush-hater like Milbank --
and works in a few more "jokes" which might have, in the hands of a senseless website hack, made it into the official WaPo record:

Our protagonist departed the White House near unto 9:20 this morning, bound for the Capitol in a determined effort to find Gary Condit. Actually, he was to meet with the House Republican caucus.
Your pool watched as POTUS descended into the bowels of the Capitol's west side accompanied by Speaker Hastert at 9:30. "We're going to talk about a lot of things," the president informed the pool. "We're going to get a lot of things done for America."

The president and the caucus got so many things done for America so quickly that the hour-long meeting lasted only 45 minutes: a 25 minute speech by the president and 20 minutes of schmoozing. ...

The big news of the day was made when our protagonist spoke about education. He declared that education is "a passion for me." In addition to this startling revelation, he made a case for free trade and his faith-based initiative.

Now, you may say that Milbank's snideness didn't make it into print. But I'm not sure that's relevant, as Carl Cameron didn't print his jokes as real; that was some dope working for the website. And furthermore, it seems that Milbank's deceptive little bon mots do occasionally make it into the Washington Post.

In a "news analysis column," "our hero" Milbank shows himself to be very fair-and-balanced and quite the cut-up by inserting this at the end of his news story:

The Quotable Bush
"I'm honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein." -- President Bush, meeting Iraqi amputees at the White House on May 25.

As Nick Kronos pointed out:

One little detail left out from Milbank's attempt to make the President look like an insensitive idiot:
The President was shaking the man's new hand because all the "amputees" had just received new limbs courtesy of American charity.

And you want to hear something really funny? Here's how the column ending with that straw-man snideness began:

For President Bush, this is the season of the straw man.
It is an ancient debating technique: Caricature your opponent's argument, then knock down the straw man you created.

I guess Milbank studied the technique well enough to develop some level of expertise.

I hope Joshy points me to the posts in which he chastised Milbank for his snide anti-Bush "joking" and suggested that Milbank be reassigned because of his partisan animus.

Because I just know that Josh "Story of My Life" Marshall wouldn't resort to blatant partisan hypocrisy on such an issue. He's a "real reporter," and he'll tell you so if you just lend him your ear.

posted by Ace at 04:15 AM

Comments

I see where Josh has points 1,3 and 4. What happened to point 2?

Posted by: Cowtipper on October 5, 2004 08:12 AM

The Milbank snide commentary is not the same as the Cameron made-up joke quotes. Lots of people do what Milbank did, although it's usually a little more subtle. And I think if Cameron had merely commented snidely about Kerry's manicure without making up funny quotes, he would have been fine.

But what Cameron did was suitable for the Onion, or Scrappleface. (Well, it wasn't quite funny enough, but you get the idea.) So I find it understandable that Joshua Micah Jebediah Springfield Marshall would get upset about Cameron and not about Milbank.

Anyway, the important thing about the Cameron teapot-tempest is that Fox discovered the screw-up quickly, took down the offending material, put up an apology, and disciplined the offender. All this within hours of its posting. Marshall can whine that he doesn't know if Cameron has been punished enough, but all of us know that Dan Rather hasn't been punished at all. And CBS, unlike Fox News, still maintains that what they gave us was fake, but accurate.

Now, for my money, quoting John Kerry showing off his manicure– THAT is fake, but accurate.

Posted by: House of Payne on October 5, 2004 08:43 AM

Kerry Campaign:

"Hey Josh, could you bring a little more attention to the manicure; we were concerned it might drop off the news cycle."

Posted by: ter0 on October 5, 2004 09:19 AM

Look, I'll forever regret siding with Joshua Hezekiah Marshall, but I think he's right INSOFAR as that Cameron really ought to be reassigned. And perhaps it's worth pointing out that Redstate, who are obvious big fans of Fox and no fan whatsoever of Marshall, agree.

Posted by: Jeff B. on October 5, 2004 11:01 AM

Dammit, my link disappeared! How do you post a link in these comments?

Posted by: Jeff B. on October 5, 2004 11:02 AM

Cameron should go away on the same day that Dan Rather gets his due.

Posted by: lauraw on October 5, 2004 11:30 AM

ditto that, when Rather is pulled off covering this election campaign, we can talk about Cameron

since we know CBS isn't going to do that, you can rest assured any report of the internal investigation won't see the light of day until after Nov. 2, the point is moot

Posted by: wannabe on October 5, 2004 12:22 PM

It's absurd to suggest Cameron be reassigned. Aren't we constantly being told that the political biases of reporters don't contaminate their reporting?

You can't have it both ways. Marshall probably thinks of himself as someone who skeptically and critically watches the powerful. But he's unwilling to show Cameron the same courtesy?

Posted by: Jeff G on October 5, 2004 12:29 PM

During Clinton reign, Marshall appeared to be what might be described as a lefty with a bit of a grasp of reality. He made a good point on the occasion.

I stopped reading him when he continued to support Clinton even after the pardons, the trashing of the White House, the removal of White House furniture and fixtures, etc.

At that point, he became just another leftwing nutcase and not worth bothering with.

Why does the blogosphere care what he says. He's a fraud. Just ignore him.

At that point, he bacame just another leftwing nutcase and not worth bothering with. Why do any bloggers care what he says. He's a fraud.

Posted by: erp on October 5, 2004 12:49 PM

FOX should do what CBS is doing: nothing for a long time, until at some later date a review is complete and some proceedures need to be addressed.

Posted by: Jane on October 5, 2004 01:00 PM

Hey, I'll admit I'm biased, but I think Carl Cameron is hysterical. He's one of the reasons I watch FNS . . . I love how snarky he is.

And the meterosexual joke is the funniest fucking thing I've heard all week.

Posted by: Scout on October 5, 2004 01:43 PM

Someone should make a table comparing _Dan's_ punishment to Carl's.

Ansy Rooney's suggesting another hour of all-Dan, they're having ABC/NBC/CBS roundtables discussing the vicious pajamahadeen, and he issued something completely dissimilar from an apology of the 'I'm sorry you're offended' variety.

Posted by: Al on October 5, 2004 04:36 PM

Slightly OT:
Front Page October 9th Los Angeles Times:

Conservative TV Group to Air Anti-Kerry Film...

In brief, the Sinclair Broadcast Group is preempting regular programming for one hour between Oct 21 and Oct 24, depending on the city, to air "Stolen Honor: Wounds that Never Heal". It will be followed by a discussion which Kerry will be asked to join.

If it happens, Ain't payback a bitch :-)

Posted by: LouisianaLightning on October 9, 2004 03:56 PM

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Posted by: pocket bike on October 28, 2004 05:21 PM

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TJM definitively ranks the films of Alfred Hitchcock

@KFILE 21m

Politico is reporting that multiple people have abruptly resigned from Eric Swalwell's gubernatorial campaign: "Members of senior leadership have departed the campaign, including Courtni Pugh, a strategic adviser who served as Swalwell's top liaison to organized labor groups."

So the campaign is collapsing due to the truth of the sexual harassment allegations.
That hissing sound you hear is the air going out of the Swalwell campaign. UPDATE: No it wasn't, it was just Swalwell one-cheek-sneaking out a fart on camera
Eric Swalwell more like Eric Farewell amirite
thanks to weft-cut loop.

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I wouldn't click on it, it's not interesting, it's just stupid clickslop. I just want to share my annoyance with you.

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Classic Rock Mystery Click
This is super-obscure and I only barely remember it. Given that, I'll give you the hint that it's by the Red Rocker.
And I guess you think you've got it made
Oh, but then, you never were afraid
Of anything that you've left behind
Oh, but it's alright with me now
'Cause I'll get back up somehow
And with a little luck, yes, I'm bound to win
Now twenty people will tell me it's not obscure, it was huge in their hometown and played at their prom. That's how it usually goes. When I linked Donnie Iris's "Love is Like a Rock," everyone said they knew that one and that his other song (which I didn't know at all) Ah Leah! was huge in their area.

Sarah Longwell spotting

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Alfred Hitchcock learns to talk with TJM

Ryan Long goes to the No Kings rally to pick up young liberal hotties and is greatly disappointed in the quality of the mish
thanks to stevey

You know we "joke" about the GOPe just "conserving" leftist things?
David French just posted:

Populists ask what conservativism has ever conserved?
Well its about to conserve birthright citizenship!
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I couldn't hate this queen of the cuck-chair more if it paid seven figures and came with a corner office.

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Podcast: CBD and Sefton talk birthright citizenship, the 14th Amendment and SCOTUS, no boots in Iran, Artemis II and refocusing NASA, the NBA's hatred of everything non-woke, and more!

In more marketing for Project Hail Mary, scientists say they've found the biosigns indicating life growing on an alien planet. It's not proof, just signatures of chemicals that are produced by biological metabolism, and it could be nothing, but scientists think it's a strong sign that this planet is inhabited by something.

In a paper published in the Astrophysical Journal Letters, a team of scientists announced the detection of dimethyl sulfide (along with a similar detection of dimethyl disulfide) in the atmosphere of an exoplanet called K2-18b. This is actually the second detection of dimethyl sulfide made on this planet, following a tentative detection in 2023.
Tons of chemicals are detected in the atmospheres of celestial objects every day. But dimethyl sulfide is different, because on Earth, it's only produced by living organisms.
"It is a shock to the system," Nikku Madhusudhan, first author on the paper, told the New York Times. "We spent an enormous amount of time just trying to get rid of the signal."

He means they tried to prove the signal was caused by things other than dimethyl sulfide but they could not.

Artemis moon shot a go, scheduled for 6:24 Eastern time tonight
Great marketing arranged by Amazon to promote Project Hail Mary. Okay not really but it does work out that way.

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Good rickroll

What? Skeleton of the most famous Musketeer, D'Artagnan, possibly discovered in Dutch church closet.
Dumas picked four names of real musketeers out of a history book, D'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos. So there was an actual D'Artagnan, though he made most of the story up. (Or, you know, all of it.)*

Charles de Batz de Castelmore, known as d'Artagnan, the famous musketeer of Kings Louis XIII and Louis XIV, spent his life in the service of the French crown.
The Gascon nobleman inspired Alexandre Dumas's hero in "The Three Musketeers" in the 19th century, a character now known worldwide thanks to the novel and numerous film adaptations.
D'Artagnan was killed during the siege of Maastricht in 1673, and there is a statue honoring the musketeer in the city. His final resting place has remained a mystery ever since.

A lot of Dumas's stories are based on bits of real history. The plot of the >Three Musketeers, about trying to recover lost diamonds from the queen's necklace, was cribbed from the then-almost-contemporaneous Affair of the Queen's Necklace. And the Man in the Iron Mask is based on real accounts of a prisoner forced to wear a mask (though I think it was a velvet mask).
* Oh, I should mention, Dumas says all this, about finding the names in an old book, in the prologue to his novel. But authors lie a lot. They frequently present fictions as based on historic fact. The twist is, he was actually telling the truth here. At least about these four musketeers having actually existed and served under Louis XIV.
Fun fact: You know the beginning of A Fistful of Dollars where the local gunslingers make fun of Clint Eastwood's donkey and Eastwood demands they apologize to the donkey? That's lifted from The Three Musketeers. Rochefort mocks D'Artagnan's old, brokedown farm horse and D'Artagnan is incensed.

A commenter asked which should be read first, The Hobbit of LOTR?
Easy, no question -- read The Hobbit first. It's actually the start of the story and comes first chronologically. It sets up some major characters and major pieces in play in LOTR.
Also, the Hobbit is Beginner-Friendly, which LOTR isn't. The Hobbit really is a delightful book, and a fast read. It's chatty, it's casual, it's exciting, and it's funny. In that dry cheeky British humor way. I love that the narrator is constantly making little asides and commentary, like he's just sitting next to you telling you this story as it occurs to him.
LOTR is a very long story. Fifteen hundred pages or so. The Hobbit is relatively short and very punchy and easy to read. If you don't like The Hobbit, you can skip out on LOTR. If you do like it, you'll be primed to read LOTR.
Oh, I should say: The Hobbit is written as if it's for children, but one of those smart children's stories that are also for adults. Don't worry, there's also real fighting and violence and horror in it, too.
LOTR is written for adults. (It's said that Tolkien wrote both for his children, but LOTR was written 17 years later, when his children were adults.) Some might not like The Hobbit due to its sometimes frivolous tone. Me, I love it. I find it constantly amusing. Both are really good but there is a starkly different tone to both. LOTR is epic, grand, and serious, about a world war, The Hobbit is light and breezy, and about a heist. Though a heist that culminates in a war for the spoils.