Ace of Spades HQ

Amazon.com Widgets

Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]

Top Headlines

Forgotten Early 80s Schmatlz Mystery Click
Honey, I was your hero And you were my leading lady
We had it all
Just like Bogie and Bacall
Ooof, it's worse than I remembered.

Canadian tribunal fines man $750,000 for believing there are only two genders
Perhaps it is time to consider a wall along our northern border. [CBD]

China Is Not Our Fren: Chinese government posts AI generated content featuring attacking and killing American soldiers. Pay attention to the ridiculous AI banter of the US soldiers. [dri]

Is TJM stupid enough to think AI is a Stanley Kubrick movie?

Dude's got his head on straight about human nature

Podcast: Sefton and CBD discuss AOC's brilliant entrance into geopolitical policy, Jesse Jackson's demise, Transsexual Psycho Killers, is NYC about to get taxed even more? Olympic athletes who bite the hand that fed them, and more!

240 million gallons of DEI [CBD]

TJM wonders about Stanley Kubrick's cultural influence.

Robert Duvall is dead at the age of 95. RIP
[CBD]

Former coblogger and friend John Ekdahl has sadly died from cancer. He was only 47.

TJM definitively ranks the movies of Park Chan-wook, director of Oldboy.

Podcast: CBD and J.J. Sefton ramble about CO2, how Epstein's mess has crossed the Atlantic, the future dismal prospects for the UK, CA tax lunacy, To The Moon Elon!, the NFL, and more!

TJM implores you to discover the work of Park Chan-wook.

Team USA Olympic Skiers 'Heartbroken,' Say They Don't Represent ICE Operations by Wearing American Flag
Then pay back all the money the country has spent on you and go ski for Canada. These are spoiled, ungrateful children. [CBD]

Ahead of Super Bowl Sunday: Revisiting Football's Charity Scandals [CBD]

TJM definitively ranks Joe Dante's cinema.

If you think that Brattleboro's reputation is unfounded, here is their selectboard meeting [CBD]

Three good short essays from our very own RI Red: Let's Talk, More Talk, and Even More Talk. [CBD]

Podcast: J.J. Sefton and CBD discuss the outrageous denial of legitimate, constitutionally-mandated federal activity by the blue states, China's army is purged, the Democrat playbook never changes, the Donroe Doctrine, 20cm artillery shells, and more!

TJM wants Joe Dante to make another movie.

Recent Comments

Rod: "The coldest winter I've spent was a summer in San ..."

Samsung Superfund: "By the time the echoes die away, the bell will rin ..."

Oldcat: "Voter preference. Posted by: Oldcat at February 2 ..."

Biff Pocoroba : "I know the 2SLGBTQIA+ Doo Dah Doo Dah community wa ..."

Bulg: "208 I never read when I’m on the pot. Too u ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "Well the dead deer would certainly be less frigid. ..."

Opinion fact: "But when it gets really foggy around here, I get n ..."

Oldcat: "It’s odd to me that New Englanders are freak ..."

JackStraw : ">>I'm glad you got power. That is a huge advantage ..."

Count de Monet: "For everyone else, "one under a blanket freezes, b ..."

My Ridiculously Circuitous Plan: "Voter preference. Posted by: Oldcat at February 2 ..."

OrangeEnt: "Allow me to be the first to predict Mandelson will ..."

Bloggers in Arms

Some Humorous Asides

Kaboom!

Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You

You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss
Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president.

A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta

Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me

Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon

A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates

Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree

Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility

The Dowd-O-Matic!

The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)


Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact Ace: aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries Capybara Crash-Up Cafe Quick Hits Drew Holden: Leftwing Media "Analysts" Are Baffled by the "Mysterious" One-Year Plunge in Crime. Spoiler: It's Only a Mystery to Propagandists Who Won't Admit the Obvious Donkey-Chompers: If You Thought My Shocking 21-Second Brain Glitch Followed by Drunk Kamala-Level Word Salad Made Me Look Stupid, Maybe The Real Problem Is With Your Stupid Brain, Stupid After Killing of Top Narcoterrorist In Military Raid, Cartels Engage In Widespread Violence and Arson Across Mexico Mamdani Calls Upon New Yorkers to Do the Jobs the Government Just Can't Do -- Shoveling Snow; He Says All Applicants Must Show ID Before Shoveling Snow Yet Another Would-Be Trump Assassin, Programmed to Kill By the Traitor Left Gavin Newsom to Black Democrats: I'm Like You, I'm Low IQ and I Can't Read THE MORNING RANT: Musings on the Door Dash Lifestyle; Dave Barry Takes a Waymo Ride Mid-Morning Art Thread Absent Friends Jay Guevara 2025 Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025 Jewells45 2025 Bandersnatch 2024 GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups Texas MoMe 2025: 10/16/2026-10/17/2026 Corsicana,TX Contact Ben Had for info	« John Kerry Demonstrates to his Staff Exactly How He'd Like His Skin to Look \| Main \| More on Rather » October 02, 2004 The Funniest Thing I Have Ever Read Hoke Malokey (like, Bob Dole, this is how I refer to myself) just read "Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim" by David Sedaris and makes the following offer to all of Ace's acolytes. Buy the book. Read the chapter about Sedaris' brother ("Rooster at the Hitchin' Post"). If it is not the funniest thing you've ever read, Ace will refund the purchase. posted by Ace at 10:47 AM Comments I dunno. P.J.O'Rourke has had me on the floor gasping for breath on several occasions. Posted by: Raoul Ortega on October 2, 2004 02:15 PM David is the GAY MULLET! Snide Quear Humor, How Droll. Amy is much funnier! Posted by: j on October 2, 2004 02:53 PM Ace, you can find more about the Rooster in Barrel Fever, one of Sedaris's earlier books. I'd also point out that as funny as Sedaris's books are, the audio books are possibly even funnier. Having listened to these, I almost can't bring myself to just read the books anymore. Speaking of the Rooster, be sure to check out http://www.sedarishardwoodfloors.com/ which is the website for the Rooster's flooring company and http://www.youcantkilltherooster.com/ where you can get official Rooster T-Shirts. Posted by: Publius on October 2, 2004 04:38 PM PJ O'Rourke had me on the floor gasping for breath too, but that's when we were dating. Ba-dump. Posted by: Hoke Malokey on October 2, 2004 04:39 PM Sorry about that loose shit. The other Rooster material is in "Me Talk Pretty One Day," not "Barrel Fever." Though I'd reccomend both, I figured I ought to correct the record before I make a maniac out of David Sedaris. Posted by: Publius on October 2, 2004 04:45 PM I've read that book - and that chapter is great! Have you read his other books - i.e. Naked, Me Talk Pretty Some Day? I recommend all of them - I've laughed out loud at ALL of them. Posted by: Isobella on October 2, 2004 10:53 PM Sedaris rocks. Who else writes a story about finding a turd in the toilet at a party, and CONTEMPLATING what to do with it? Plus, David Sedaris' books are the only books my wife has ever read. They're like Tivo and Seinfeld for her...every viewing is a new viewing, and every reading is a new reading. As long as he cranks one out every couple of years, I'm good to go. Posted by: Scott Chaffin on October 2, 2004 11:53 PM Post a comment Name: Email Address: URL: Comments: Remember info?	Now Available! The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines Forgotten Early 80s Schmatlz Mystery Click Honey, I was your hero And you were my leading lady We had it all Just like Bogie and Bacall Ooof, it's worse than I remembered. Canadian tribunal fines man $750,000 for believing there are only two genders Perhaps it is time to consider a wall along our northern border. [CBD] China Is Not Our Fren: Chinese government posts AI generated content featuring attacking and killing American soldiers. Pay attention to the ridiculous AI banter of the US soldiers. [dri] Is TJM stupid enough to think AI is a Stanley Kubrick movie? Dude's got his head on straight about human nature Podcast: Sefton and CBD discuss AOC's brilliant entrance into geopolitical policy, Jesse Jackson's demise, Transsexual Psycho Killers, is NYC about to get taxed even more? Olympic athletes who bite the hand that fed them, and more! 240 million gallons of DEI [CBD] TJM wonders about Stanley Kubrick's cultural influence. Robert Duvall is dead at the age of 95. RIP [CBD] Former coblogger and friend John Ekdahl has sadly died from cancer. He was only 47. TJM definitively ranks the movies of Park Chan-wook, director of Oldboy. Podcast: CBD and J.J. Sefton ramble about CO2, how Epstein's mess has crossed the Atlantic, the future dismal prospects for the UK, CA tax lunacy, To The Moon Elon!, the NFL, and more! TJM implores you to discover the work of Park Chan-wook. Team USA Olympic Skiers 'Heartbroken,' Say They Don't Represent ICE Operations by Wearing American Flag Then pay back all the money the country has spent on you and go ski for Canada. These are spoiled, ungrateful children. [CBD] Ahead of Super Bowl Sunday: Revisiting Football's Charity Scandals [CBD] TJM definitively ranks Joe Dante's cinema. If you think that Brattleboro's reputation is unfounded, here is their selectboard meeting [CBD] Three good short essays from our very own RI Red: Let's Talk, More Talk, and Even More Talk. [CBD] Podcast: J.J. Sefton and CBD discuss the outrageous denial of legitimate, constitutionally-mandated federal activity by the blue states, China's army is purged, the Democrat playbook never changes, the Donroe Doctrine, 20cm artillery shells, and more! TJM wants Joe Dante to make another movie. Recent Comments Rod: "The coldest winter I've spent was a summer in San ..." Samsung Superfund: "By the time the echoes die away, the bell will rin ..." Oldcat: "Voter preference. Posted by: Oldcat at February 2 ..." Biff Pocoroba : "I know the 2SLGBTQIA+ Doo Dah Doo Dah community wa ..." Bulg: "208 I never read when I’m on the pot. Too u ..." Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "Well the dead deer would certainly be less frigid. ..." Opinion fact: "But when it gets really foggy around here, I get n ..." Oldcat: "It’s odd to me that New Englanders are freak ..." JackStraw : ">>I'm glad you got power. That is a huge advantage ..." Count de Monet: "For everyone else, "one under a blanket freezes, b ..." My Ridiculously Circuitous Plan: "Voter preference. Posted by: Oldcat at February 2 ..." OrangeEnt: "Allow me to be the first to predict Mandelson will ..." Bloggers in Arms RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides Kaboom! Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 December 0000 Syndicate this site (XML) Powered by Movable Type 2.64

The Funniest Thing I Have Ever Read