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Monday Overnight Open Thread (9/15/25) Blue Monday Cafe Joe Manchin: Obama and Biden Destroyed "the Guardrails" That Make Peaceful Democracy Possible Trump Destroys Another Narcoterrorist Drug Boat The Trans-"Ally" Antifa Assassin Confessed to His Trans Pals JD Vance Guest Hosts the Charlie Kirk Show: "This is not a 'both sides' problem" FBI Investigating a Conspiracy of Violent Far-Left Transgenders Who Proclaimed That Charlie Kirk Would be Murdered on September 10th and Who Admitted Their Role in the Conspiracy: "We F***ing Did It!" Washington Post Fires Left-Wing Extremist DEI Savage for Dancing on Charlie Kirk's Grave, Suggesting His Assassination Is Warranted The Commuter Rail Murder: Disincorporate Charlotte, Dissolve Mecklenburg County, Eliminate the District Court Absent Friends
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October 02, 2004
The Funniest Thing I Have Ever ReadHoke Malokey (like, Bob Dole, this is how I refer to myself) just read "Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim" by David Sedaris and makes the following offer to all of Ace's acolytes. Buy the book. Read the chapter about Sedaris' brother ("Rooster at the Hitchin' Post"). If it is not the funniest thing you've ever read, Ace will refund the purchase. posted by Ace at 10:47 AM
CommentsI dunno. P.J.O'Rourke has had me on the floor gasping for breath on several occasions. Posted by: Raoul Ortega on October 2, 2004 02:15 PM
David is the GAY MULLET! Snide Quear Humor, How Droll. Amy is much funnier! Posted by: j on October 2, 2004 02:53 PM
Ace, you can find more about the Rooster in Barrel Fever, one of Sedaris's earlier books. I'd also point out that as funny as Sedaris's books are, the audio books are possibly even funnier. Having listened to these, I almost can't bring myself to just read the books anymore. Speaking of the Rooster, be sure to check out http://www.sedarishardwoodfloors.com/ which is the website for the Rooster's flooring company and http://www.youcantkilltherooster.com/ where you can get official Rooster T-Shirts. Posted by: Publius on October 2, 2004 04:38 PM
PJ O'Rourke had me on the floor gasping for breath too, but that's when we were dating. Ba-dump. Posted by: Hoke Malokey on October 2, 2004 04:39 PM
Sorry about that loose shit. The other Rooster material is in "Me Talk Pretty One Day," not "Barrel Fever." Though I'd reccomend both, I figured I ought to correct the record before I make a maniac out of David Sedaris. Posted by: Publius on October 2, 2004 04:45 PM
I've read that book - and that chapter is great! Have you read his other books - i.e. Naked, Me Talk Pretty Some Day? I recommend all of them - I've laughed out loud at ALL of them. Posted by: Isobella on October 2, 2004 10:53 PM
Sedaris rocks. Who else writes a story about finding a turd in the toilet at a party, and CONTEMPLATING what to do with it? Plus, David Sedaris' books are the only books my wife has ever read. They're like Tivo and Seinfeld for her...every viewing is a new viewing, and every reading is a new reading. As long as he cranks one out every couple of years, I'm good to go. Posted by: Scott Chaffin on October 2, 2004 11:53 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Maori men in NZ do a haka war display for Charlie Kirk
You vicious bastards shot the wrong man. You have set the world on fire. This will be your apocalypse.
Nick Freitas responds to the Left's intentional lies that they are always the victim and the Right is always the oppressor. He refuses to play their game anymore. This is a must view. [dri]
I wonder if he was fearless. I wonder if he was scared. I wonder if he just did it anyway?-- Mike Rowe
Low-T High-Calorie Potato Brian Stelter: "Matthew Dowd is no longer an MSNBC political analyst, according to a network source."
Matt Dowd, former Disney Groomer Corporation Political Director and John McCain advisor (of course), is the one who blamed Charlie Kirk's shooting on the real assassin, Charlie Kirk, claiming that Charlie's "hateful words lead to hateful actions."
Trump speaks about the "heinous assassination" of Charlie Kirk, notes the left relentlessly demonized him until they radicalized an assassin to kill him
"For years, the radical left has compared wonderful Americans like Charlie to NAZlS... this type of language is DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the terrorism we're seeing in our country today.
Argentinian PM Javier Millei: "The left is always, at all times and places, a violent phenomenon full of hatred."
I disregard their hate. It's the violence that we object to. And we will begin objecting to it with force.
Update: Kash Patel says the person of interest has been interrogated and then released. Wrong guy, I guess.
But as the hours pass without a real suspect, and with the FBI apparently interrogating uninvolved people, I begin to fear the assassin has escaped. I mean, they don't seem to be following a breadcrumb trail, they seem genuinely baffled.
Karol Sheinin: I can confirm the person of interest questioned by the FBI is Zachariah Ahmed Qureshi.
If this is the guy -- apparently he also interned at Heritage. Update: Source says he's been released? Wrong guy?
Fat-F*ck Pritzker blames Trump's rhetoric for the ramp up of political violence! May he rot in hell! [CBD]
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Broward County Officials Accused of Adding Over 100,000 Ineligible Voters to the Rolls It is too soon to know how it happened, but...Republicans are watching! And that is how it is done. [CBD]
Federal judge temporarily blocks Trump from firing Federal Reserve Gov Lisa Cook With absolutely nonsensical reasoning, but you already knew that. [CBD]
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James Varney: Reflecting on Hurricane Katrina twenty years later, and the partisan uses Democrats found for it
There was fear aplenty. But the truth is, a lot of the panic Americans saw on television was performative. The throngs of people along Convention Center Boulevard sat patiently in the broiling weather, five or six deep in folding chairs on the sidewalk, waiting for something, someone, to arrive. Then, a television crew or photographer would show up, and people would pour into the street, falling on their knees, screaming and gesticulating to the camera. It was an awful situation, obviously, but when the camera wasn't on them, it was remarkable how patient and orderly everyone was.
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: the most repetitive but catchy earworm of the eighties?
Sometimes, I find you doubt my love for you but I don't mind Why should I mind? Why should I mind? It's hard to quote the song while avoiding quoting from the endlessly-repeated chorus. Wait, my mistake, his other hit from 1985 was the most repetitive new wave hit of the 80s.
David French Is Aggressively and Persistently Dishonorable, But Fortunately He's Also Really Bad At It
Here's a solid beating of the execrable French! [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
I'm gonna get high, man, I'm gonna get loose/ Need me a triple shot of that juice Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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