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September 30, 2004
John Kerry Driven Insane By Little Flashing LightGABLES, Fla. (AP) - Democratic candidate John Kerry's campaign demanded Thursday that the lights signaling when a speaker's time has expired during debates with President Bush be removed from the lecterns because they are distracting, but the commission hosting the debates refused. Is it so hard for this moron to just limit his scary-important dissertations to two minutes? Or is his camp just trying to reduce expectations? Is this story real or contrived in order to make people think that John Kerry might Hulk Out if the time-expired light goes on? Eh. Either way, he's a shaved Bigfoot. Thanks to AS. No, a different AS. posted by Ace at 02:38 PM
CommentsI would love to be a fly on the wall in the "Kerry Suite" Jenny Backus is probably straining to keep her peepers in her head as we speak! I think they should have Teresa stand up and start telling people to shove it as soon as those lights start blinking! Posted by: Jennifer on September 30, 2004 02:45 PM
I got it. a) He won't release his medical records Is it Narcolepsy? This explains his falling off bikes, forgetting what he's said shortly after saying it and sleeping through the last year of Senate votes. Posted by: Dear Johns on September 30, 2004 02:56 PM
This is the best part of the AP Story: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=694&ncid=696&e=2&u=/ap/20040930/ap_on_el_pr/debate_light_fight
That line is getting pretty tired. Posted by: j. fredd muggs on September 30, 2004 03:02 PM
Easily distracted, isn't he? Then again, we really shouldn't expect anything else from a man who apparently doesn't know the difference between night and afternoon. And Bush is the one who's supposed to be an idiot! Posted by: zetetic on September 30, 2004 03:07 PM
I'm telling you, he didn't confuse night and afternoon, he's just used to suddenly falling asleep in the middle of the day. Posted by: Dear Johns on September 30, 2004 03:13 PM
Like Jean-Luc Picard, perhaps Kerry really sees four lights. http://sttng.epguides.info/?ID=311 Cheers, Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on September 30, 2004 03:14 PM
The funny thing is that they have nice big spotlight-type timing lights installed in the audience to alert the speakers, and if you think the dinky little red/yellow/green lights are distracting, why not point out the honkin' big in-your-face lights? Unless, of course, you plan on going over a lot, and don't want the whole world to notice that you can't say anything in under two minutes... Posted by: cirby on September 30, 2004 03:27 PM
Excellent Star Trek reference. However, I think it's more likely that Kerry is the Balok Dummy from the Corbomite Maneuver episode. He's using this maneuver now, which is why he's pretending to be behind before his "strong closing". Either that or he's been asleep again. Posted by: Dear Johns on September 30, 2004 03:32 PM
All of this doesn't really matter, for I guarantee that tomorrow's papers will inform us, no matter what we thought we saw tonight, that Kerry won the debate and that the Bush campaign is in big trouble. The reason? This is Kerry's last chance and see here for more Posted by: steve sturm on September 30, 2004 03:55 PM
Weren't these details already negotiated, hashed out, and agreed upon by the respective campaigns? If he didn't want the lectern lights, why did he, through his reps, agree to them earlier? And most importantly, if he and his team can't successfully negotiate favorable conditions for their candidate for a freakin' campaign debate, how in the hell does he expect to voters to think he can successfully further America's best interests with overtly and covertly hostile powers? Posted by: Rocketeer on September 30, 2004 04:23 PM
Wow, he really seized the opportunity to dispel that image of himself as a petulant, entitled, arrogant aristocrat, didn't he? Posted by: Brian B on September 30, 2004 05:03 PM
If he didn't want the lectern lights, why did he, through his reps, agree to them earlier? That's easy to explain, Rocketeer. He voted for the lights...before he voted against them. Posted by: Sean M. on September 30, 2004 06:43 PM
"Is it so hard for this moron to just limit his scary-important dissertations to two minutes?" Posted by: Dawn Summers on October 1, 2004 12:42 PM
Hello folks nice blog youre running Posted by: lolita on January 19, 2005 08:38 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
California City Bans Pickleball Over Noise Complaints
It's about time! [CBD]
'A Monumental Betrayal': Indiana Republicans Fold Like a Cheap Suit, Defy Trump on Redistricting
GOPe business as usual in the Hoosier State. [CBD]
Live voting in the House to end the shutdown.
I don't know if this is a preliminary procedural vote or what.
I can't tell you the rules of three-dimensional chess but I can tell you the rules of hexagonal chess
Yes it's real This is too nerdy, even for this blog.
Our Favorite British Couple Exploring True America Experiences Flora-Bama And Sees A Side Of The Deep South Rarely Seen. [dri]
Oh no! Hamas' de facto press agent at the UN complains that she can't use her credit cards or rent a card now that she's been sanctioned as a terrorist operative
Why does this keep happening to members of the "political organization" (per Tucker Carlson) of Hamas?!?!
Tucker Carlson claims that it's weird that Ted Cruz is interested in the massacre of Christians by Nigerian Muslims, because he has "no track record of being interested in Christians," then blows off the massacre of Christians by Nigerian Muslims, saying it might or might not be a real concern
Tucker Carlson enjoys using the left-wing tactic of "Tactical Ignorance" to avoid taking positions on topics. Is Hamas really a terrorist organization? Tucker can't say. He hasn't looked into it enough, but "it seems like a political organization to me." Are Muslims slaughtering Christians in Nigeria? Again, Tucker just doesn't know. He hasn't examined the evidence yet. He knows every Palestinian Christian who said he was blocked from visiting holy sites in Bethlehem, but he just hasn't had the time to look into the mass slaughter of Christians in Nigeria that has been going on since (checks watch) 2009. He doesn't know, so he can't offer an opinion. Wouldn't be prudent, you know? Don't rush him! He'll sift through the evidence at some point in the future and render an opinion sometime around 2044. Of course, if you need an opinion on Jewish Perfidy, he has all the facts at his fingertips and can give you a fully informed opinion pronto. Say, have you ever heard of the USS Liberty incident...? You'd think that the main issue for Tucker Carlson, who pretends to be so deeply concerned about Palestinian Christians being bullied by Jews in Israel (supposedly), would be the massacre of 185,000 Christians in Nigeria itself. But no, his main problem is that Ted Cruz is talking about it, "who has no track record of being interested in Christians at all." And then he just shrugs as to whether this is even a real issue or not. Whatever we do we must never "divide the right," huh? Tucker is attacking Ted Cruz for bringing the issue up because he's acting as an apologist for Jihadism, and he can't cleanly admit that Jihadists are killing any Christians, anywhere. There is no daylight between him and CAIR at this point. One might conclude that Tucker Carlson himself isn't interested in the plight of Christians -- except as they can be used as a cudgel to attack Jews. Just gonna ask an Interesting Question myself -- why is it that Tucker Carlson's arguments all track with those shit out by Qatarian propaganda agents and the far left? That if Jews crush an ant underfoot it is worldwide news, but when Muslims slaughter Christians it elicits not even a vigorous shrug?
Garth Merenghi is interviewed by the only man who can fathom his ineffable brilliance -- Garth Merenghi
From the comments: I once glimpsed Garth in the penumbra betwixt my wake and sleep. He was in my dream, standing afar, not looking my way, nor did he acknowledge me. But I felt seen. And that's when I knew I was a traveler on the right path. I'm glad he's still with us. Now that's some Merenghian prose. Garth Merenghi on the writer's craft Greetings, Traveler. If you still have not experienced Garth Merenghi -- Author, Dream-weaver, Visionary, plus Actor -- the six episodes of his Darkplace are still available on YouTube and supposedly upscaled to HD. (Viewing it now, it doesn't appeared upscaled for shit.) I think the second episode, "Hell Hath Fury," is the best by a good margin. Try to at least watch through to that one. It's Mereghi's incisive but nuanced take on sexism.
Update on Scott Adams:
Scott Adams had approval for this cancer drug but they hadn't scheduled him to get it. He was taking a turn for the worse. Trump had told him to call if he needed anything, so he did. Talked to Don Jr (who is in Africa) , then RFK Jr, then Dr Oz. Someone talked to Kaiser and he was scheduled. Shouldn't have needed it but he did and he says it saved his life.
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