"We will hunt you down. And we will cuddle you!"

Sen. John Edwards, revising his stump speech.

New Kerry slogan:

"I'll use protection!"

Couldn't suck worse than any of the rest he keeps trying.

"Thoughtful" as in, "what will the French think?"

"More proactive?" What's he gonna do, send in NINJAS?!

"Sensitive?" We're ALREADY refusing to use bullets made in Israel. How sensitive can you get?

Kerry: I shop at the softer side of Sears!

Is this more of that Elmo attack from the Convention?

I'm still spitting in disgust over the "swift response if we are attacked" phrase. Now I'll need strong liquor to get the 'sensitive' taste out of my mouth.

We're attacked, and Kerry thrashes around trying to figure out the proper, strongly worded admonition not to be naughty.

Oh, please.

Kerry attack squad: Teenage Mutant Ninja Hamsters.

"Sensitive war on terror"? Gotta love his metrosexual lexicon.

Dollars to doughnuts Kerry's script--or whatever--prolly called for "more *sensible* war," but PC touchy-feely conditioned as he is, he slipped.

Not that his uber-PC audience would ever even notice the gaffe. Those are committed only by Republicans; it's in the journalism stylebooks.

Cordially...

What else from Paper Cut Kerry?

There will be plenty of purple hearts to go around boyz!

I've been convinced all along that we need to combat terrorism with bubblebaths, aroma-therapy, and--most importantly--hugs. Finally, a candidate who speaks to me!

If Kerry wins, will terrorists wanting to enter the U.S. be required to attend a sensitivity training class before receiving their visas?

I'm sure Kerry will give him a big hug
when I get Bin Ladens.

you all are idiots who take quotes out of context and are too blind to see that bush is an absolute and utter failure on every important issue. if you all were bright enough to understand international relations, sociology, and politics, you all would realize what a complete failure bush really is.

save the planet, more trees and less bush

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