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June 15, 2004
Go Read KausKaus' postings today are all compulsively readable. One thing I don't like about the amateur leftist newsletter Slate is the artificial and strained attitude they force into their pieces. Most magazines, even amateur leftist newsletters, strive for some sort of defining style; Slate has decided its defining pose is Revenge of the Dweeb. Its tone is smug and nasty and stinks of adolescent revenge fantasy, i.e., One day I'll have a cool job at a cool magazine and I'll get back at all those jocks and swells who called me "gaywad." If Maureen Dowd's pose is the feathered-earring-wearing cool-chick-who's-also-clever shooting spitballs at the teacher's back, Slate's collective pose is the arrogant, despised nastygeek picking his nose and wiping it on your sandwich when you're not looking and then writing about this great triumph in his Dream Journal. Now, Mickey Kaus sort of has that smug tone, too. But he actually manages what the nastygeeks never can, which is remaining charming while sticking in the dagger. Kaus tears apart that idiotic New York Times puff-piece so relentlessly promoted by Drudge last week. He finds that there's absolutely nothing of value in the whole piece: Does Even John Kerry Deserve Jodi Wilgoren? Jodi Wilgoren's Sunday front page NYT piece goes beneath the surface to uncover the "many facets of Mr. Kerry's style and personality that [are] all but invisible to most voters in this era of stage-managed politics, where authentic insights into the people who would be president are precious few." There's a self-puffing, expectations-raising billboard graf! And what does Wilgoren come up with after her "observations on the campaign trail over several months, combined with interviews with politicians and aides who spend time by his side"? Kerry polishes his speeches. He talks a lot on the phone. He went to an aide's wedding! Wow! That's journalistic gold. ... P.P.S.: I forgot--Kerry also bowled an orange down the aisle of his campaign plane! Gee, no candidate's ever done that before. When a reporter resorts to describing the "orange bowling" ritual that's been going on since at least the Hart campaign of 1984, it's a sure sign of desperation. . ...For that matter, Wilgoren doesn't tell us any of the "multisyllabic uppercrust" phrasings she says Kerry uses, or any of the "pop culture" he's "up on," or any of the "unfamiliar words" a campaign intern had to look up (as his "main responsibility"--another "authentic" detail that reeks of B.S.). Doesn't the NYT have an editor with the power to write "Example, pls"?] What Tim Noah and the rest of the nonentities at Slate don't realize is that sarcasm has its time and place; not every fucking sentence you write either should or can drip with sarcasm. They attempt to disguise the fact that they have nothing interesting to say by writing in an "edgy," "highly-attitudinal" style. It's like listening to Richard Belzer deliver a eulogy to Reagan. "Yeah, right. Reagan. Star Wars. Right. Yeah. Ronny Ray-Gun. Right. Ketchup is a vegatable. Yeah, right. Oswald shot Kennedy. Yeah, right." There's a time and place for sarcasm, and Kaus, unlike the rest of the useless crew at Slate, seem to understand that restriction. Anyway, back to the article Kaus disses. I love that she fills the piece with so many general claims, and yet doesn't provide the specific, tangible examples that would make her generalities come alive. Specifics are the lifeblood of reporting, but apparently this reporter didn't get that memo. As Kevin Pollack might say, she was absent the day they taught journalism at j-school. Oh wait-- she did nail down one specific. There is that hi-larious orange-bowling incident. Great takedown. The NYT is, of course, the greatest newspaper in the history of the world. Now, if only Kaus could cure his bad case of the slammies, and knock it off with that "isn't this cute?" back-and-forth repartee with his editor... [But don't you find that the editorial banter is part of his defining style? -- ed. No, I don't. I think it's a distraction. And, by the way, who the fuck are you? I don't have an editor. Oh, right, sorry.-- ed.] posted by Ace at 03:03 AM
CommentsAce: I believe it is spelled vegEtable. P.S. The Belzer bit was hilarious. Posted by: Kerry Is Unelectable on June 15, 2004 07:19 AM
Good piece. Hits all of its marks. Posted by: Nicholas Kronos on June 15, 2004 08:22 AM
Make that cool-chick-wannabe Posted by: milkmaid on June 15, 2004 09:12 AM
"Slate's collective pose is the arrogant, despised nastygeek picking his nose and wiping it on your sandwich when you're not looking and then writing about this great triumph in his Dream Journal." I have a thing about boogers. I can no longer eat at Subway after reading that. Posted by: Golden Boy on June 15, 2004 10:40 AM
John Cole exerpted another part of this NYT piece that jumped off the screen at me. (I know, Ace, the sarcastic/snide/post-ironic Slate schtick wears thin.) Anyway, in the continuing prose/fellation, the reporter gushes that Kerry spends time "strumming on a Spanish classical guitar" and he's "learning a new (old) song, 'This Land Is Your Land.'" Astounding. Utterly astounding. First, how long does it take to learn three chords? Major chords--not minor, dimished, augmented, seventh, ninth, etc. Straight I-IV-V progression. All right, non-musos can pass on that one. Second, why would this song be "new (old)" to Kerry? I'd wager that anyone who's ever posted on any of Ace's threads could come up with a few lines of this old chestnut. Didn't we all sing this song in elementary school? C,mon, this song has been in the American music pantheon for probably 75 years. This incredibly lame attempt to portray Kerry as complex but down-to-earth guy only succeeds in unwittingly revealing that Kerry's priviledged, Swiss boarding school upbringing is about as far removed from the average american's as his gold-digging wife's. More vomit and effluvia from the NYT. Posted by: kelly on June 15, 2004 03:43 PM
This land is your land Posted by: Vickie on June 16, 2004 02:04 PM
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Forgotten 80s Mystery Click, Dutch Masters Edition
Mumbled spoken intro: Somewhere in a lonely hotel room, there's a guy starting to realize That eternal fate has turned its back on him, it's 2 a.m. Focus on the "it's 2 a.m." If that didn't rumble it, try this: I'm falling down a spiral, destination unknown Double-crossed messenger all alone Can't get no connection, can't get through, where are you? Well, the night weighs heavy on his guilty mind This far from the borderline When the hitman comes, he knows damn well he has been cheated This song rocks. Unjustly forgotten!
Disheveled Potato Brian Stelter caught walking around without shoes on a train after WHCA parties
Looks like the potato had a lot of vodka in it, amirite
Trump Orders Reopening of Alcatraz to Imprison Serial Offenders
Nope. Dumb idea. It will cost a fortune. What's the point? [CBD]
Something Is Seriously Wrong With Michelle Obama
Ya think? Besides the whole "chick with dick" thing, she is a rancid, spoiled, entitled, ungrateful, racist b*tch. [CBD]
Janet Mills And Her Family Get Rich Off The Maine Governor's Transgender Stance
They are ghouls [CBD] ![]()
Marines Explore Counter-Drone Capabilities for Amphibious Combat Vehicle Amid Growing Threats People in the know, worry...a lot! about drone warfare. [CBD]
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Stephen Miller: The courts are attempting to unconstitutionally enshrine open borders into law by imposing an "infinite process" on deportations.
They're too cowardly to admit what they're doing and just say, "We don't like the way they people voted and who they voted for, so we're deposing the president through a judicial coup." Instead, they're just making it so that we can have a nominal law that allows the deportations of foreign criminals and gang members, but we're also going to impose "due process" requirements that will guarantee all illegals a lifetime residency in the US.
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: The Last Days of Yacht Rock Edition
Introduce me to that big blonde She's got a touch of Tuesday Weld She's wearing Ambush and a French twist She's got us wild and she can tell 80% yacht, 20% rock.
George Clooney now looks like Bela Lugosi from Ed Wood
In this "interview," Jake Tapper claims that Clooney writing an op-ed at the instigation of Barack Obama was "brave," and Clooney returns the favor by telling Jake Tapper that "journalists" are brave and irreplaceable. It's the world's least enticing gay porn.
Prepare for a shock: Former (?) Handgun Control, Inc. spokesman Jake Tapper lies about the background of his hard-left political agitator guest, presenting him as merely an "FSU student" and allowing him to claim Republicans have blood on their hands for the recent school shooting
However, D'Onofrio isn't some dispassionate observer. He's not just some random FSU student. It doesn't sound like he was anywhere in the neighborhood of the shooting, either. He was brought on primarily to talk about the politics, but was presented as an FSU student to try and leverage sympathy for his position.
The Pope has died. [Weirddave]
The price of eggs has dropped from an average of $8/dozen to $3.13/dozen but Democrats are claiming Easter eggs prices are up. I guess all of the non- or anti-Christian "fact" checkers in the media are taking the day off, for some reason.
Trump offers Easter wishes
Happy Easter! BTW, I read that this is the first time in years the White House website has offered an Easter prayer. Every other religion and fake religion got promoted by Biden, but not Christianity. Oh, and NPR's Easter story is that "Trump seeks corporate sponsors for Easter egg roll." Obviously every president does this, but this communist propaganda organization only points it out now, after having denied the Biden's family influence-farming operations for a decade.
An idiot congressman tries to get us into a shooting war with Russia! Brian Fitzpatrick represents Pennsylvania... very, very poorly. [CBD]
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