If Whitley Strieber, a science fiction writer, claimed to be abducted by aliens it must be true. Its not like he has made any money off the whole episode. Oh, he is also a raving moonbat.

Some believe the prototypical "alien face" recalled in abduction stories is just the basic "facial template" of a mother seen through a newborn's eyes, remembered in a dreamlike state.

I think it's more that we have that facial template so we can recognize Mom as a newborn with poor vision, and that template is being grafted onto image aliens. I don't think the claim in that anybody is remembering anything from infancy. It's pretty well established that you can't form any memories until you're around 2 years old, and that fact is known in the skeptical community (since it came up during cases of false memories being implanted by hypnosis).

Oh and he is a fucking retard that has no clue what WP is used for.

http://www.unknowncountry.com/news/?id=5006

Check out the other "news" at the bottom.

I dunno, there were an awful lot of other alien faces out there before the "greys" went mainstream. If this theory was true it would imply that we would have started out with the concept of the greys instead of going through a whole menagerie of ridiculous b-movie worthy alien encounters before someone came up with the more compelling idea that's stuck in our culture now.

EVERYONE knows what a grey looks like now, we don't need to have a facial template in our subconcious to imagine them under the bed or in the closet.

So does this mean like...

...these people were anal probed with stainless steel rods by their mothers then?

Seriously. Tough. Love.

Paging Dr. Freud!

So does this mean like...

...these people were anal probed with stainless steel rods by their mothers then?

...

Paging Dr. Freud!

I don't believe in Freudianism, but that's a pretty cool Unified Theory of Crazy.

About ten years my friends and I had a pre-Christmas party where we exchanged gifts. I bought my friend Bugs a set of "grey" alien hand puppets. They fit over your hand and, from within the black cloak, could move their arms back and forth -- kinda rock'em sock'em robots-style.

Our host's (Tex) dog, Harley never paid attention to other dolls are figurines. But these puppets kinda freaked her out.

When Bugs put one of them on, Harley walked right up to it -- kinda carefully -- and studied it as if it were a kitten ot something. She seemed to think it was alive. She made a weird groal/whine as if she was very uncomfortable aboutthis new guest.

Then, when Harley was nearly nose-to-nose with the grey, Bugs extended one of it's arms very slowly and Harley backed off nervously and then barked at it. Since the thing probably smelled like rubber, Harley's reaction to it was completely visual.

The whole thing was kinda creepy to watch and Bugs put the puppet away and made sure that Harley wouldn't have to see it again.

I don't know about this hardwired facial template stuff. I'm just sayin' is all.

...these people were anal probed with stainless steel rods by their mothers then?

No... those were thermometers!!!

Just make sure not to mix them up.....

I remember reading an article last week discussing the relationship between paranoid/schizo fantasies and location. It turns out that people who live in rural areas tend to have a much higher incidence of "alien abduction" while people living in cities tend towards "big brother" style episodes.

Basically, people's fears manifest themselves based on what frightens them the most.

Tuning Spork, that is a very intriguing story. Or, rather, it would be, if my in-laws' dog didn't have the exact same reaction to...balloons. Is he responding to a balloon template image that all dogs have? Or was he abucted and mistreated by balloons at some point?

The funny part about the balloons is that being so light they'd move slightly due to air flow, causing the dog to make a panicked retreat. He'd then resume verrrry slowly approaching them until the next slight movement. This went on for hours.

It turns out that people who live in rural areas tend to have a much higher incidence of "alien abduction" while people living in cities tend towards "big brother" style episodes.

Well c'mon. If you were going to land a spacecraft, abduct an earthling, probe them anally back at the mother ship, and then return them, hopefully without attracting too much attention, wouldn't you focus on targets in isolated rural areas? Sure you would. You would know that those rednecks don't have much credibility with the MSM anyway.

On the other hand, if you were part of a nefarious "big brother" kind of secret society bent on world domination (like Opus Dei or Halliburton), wouldn't you focus first on densely populated areas? Sure you would. That's where it's easiest to slip something into the drinking water used by millions. I don't know what you would put in the water, but you'd probably call it "flouride".

Well, Harley never reacted that way to balloons! Yer in-laws' dog mighta been just a wee bit skittish about seeing movements he couldn't comprehend the cause of. Which might actually explain Harley's reaction to the moving puppet?

No, wait. Harley didn't react that way to my sister's Charlie McCarthy puppet. Hmmm...

Don't you guys watch movies? The dogs are always the first ones to spot an alien.

Think it's just a coincidence that all the movies agree on this?

I think not.

I mentioned Opus Dei and Halliburton earlier. I'm sure most of Ace's readers already know this, but just to make sure, these groups (and many others) are only front organizations for the ELDERS OF ZION.

But, that's obvious, right?

It turns out that people who live in rural areas tend to have a much higher incidence of "alien abduction

I'm thinkin' thats more related to having a good story for why that one quick drink after work lasted until 2:00am

The world will never starve for want of wonders, but for want of wonder.
G.K. Chesterton

Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science.
R.W. Emerson

Hey, you know that thing about aliens probing your ass first thing? Yep. It's true. Right when you get on the damned ship. They are totally fascinated by assholes.

How often do the aliens visit you, Angelique?

They are totally fascinated by assholes.

Who isn't?

I can confirm that.

I get the classic nocturnal-paralysis-lucid-dreaming thing about three times a week (I'm under a lot of stress). It used to freak the bejeezus out of me, but I was smart enough to realise there was a bona fide rational explanation for my feelings of dread and horror and that Iwasn't going to get anal-probed by Kang and Kodos. Also, I was probably okay when it came to eldritch visitations from Shub-Niggurath. This was a big weight off my mind.

Okay, here's the deal. I was watching a fishing show once where they were pulling fish up from real deep, and the sudden change in pressure caused their air bladders to hyper-inflate. Before they threw them back they had to insert a needle into the fish's air bladder and equalize the pressure. I suddenly realized the secret to the alien abduction stories, and a rational explanation for them.

You know the common S-F theme where there is an advanced intergalatic UN type deal that regulates the colonization of new planets? The one where there are advanced alien salvage dudes hanging out hoping we blow ourselves up so they can come in and have a clearance sale? Well what if they get bored and start watching Earth TV, fishing shows would probably look pretty cool, huh? And they got tractor beams and shit. The only thing is, and this is in ALL the stories, is they can't do anything to affect mankind's destiny. So they have to fish for dumbasses.

You see they troll with thought beams full of crazy ideas, and when some hick wino believes it, he is hooked and they reel him in with one of them tractor beams. They have to stick probes up his ass and shit to equalize the pressure before they throw him back. It is the only thing that makes sense.

And if I am full of shit like you are thinking right now, how come I ain't been caught?

S

This facial-recognition stuff is interesting. I guess this is why I never had any dreams of alien greys - MY mom looks like the Borg Queen:"you will do your homeork - resistance is futile:)"

They are totally fascinated by assholes.

Aliens must be democrats.

Whodathunkit? But it explains a lot of things...

Your Mom looks like the Borg Queen? She was really hot in 'Ghost Story.'

It should be remembered that until the late 70's the Greys were just one of many commonly reported UFO inhabitants. After 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind' was seen by nearly every living person in the developed world and beyond the Greys became #1 with a bullet in abduction reports.

"Also, I was probably okay when it came to eldritch visitations from Shub-Niggurath."

Yep.

It's that fucker Dagon you've got to watch out for.

I still don't get why these extra-terrestrial types fly billions of my miles and then land in E. Armadillo, OK and pick some trailer park dude to examine. Why not MIT, Cal Tech? Is Stephen Hawkings moving to fast for them?

And why is it always an anal probe? I understand that a good many of us seem to think with our asses but wouldn't the law of averages have you start with the brain? And if that anal probe is coupled with immersion in a vat of icy water, well they are gonna have to deal with Andrew Sullivan and mister that won't be pretty.

Damn dude, I just explained all that a couple posts above.

Damn, should have known the explanation would be here. I'm a dumb shit. I guess this means I need to be worried about tractor beams and get some astroglide. Like I didn't have enough to worry about.

So they have to fish for dumbasses.

LOL!

I guess this means I need to be worried about tractor beams and get some astroglide.

No, dumbass -- just wear a tinfoil hat.

I like Madfish Willie's theory. If those alien faces are memories of mom, then the anal probes are most likely anal thermometers from when we were sick with the flu.

but you'd probably call it "flouride".

You know when fluoridation first began? Nineteen hundred and forty-six. Nineteen forty-six, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.

I can't believe I only get one result when I image google Vondjina. Come to think of it, I should have tried some other spellings.

Penn & Teller had a great episode on UFOs and alien abductions on their tv show "Bullshit!" They make some of the same points made here, actually. The big one is that back in the 1950s alien abduction stories tended to involve aliens that looked like guys in big rubber suits, because that was the concept of a movie "alien" back then. Now its the Roswell Greys that are in popular culture, with things like "Fire in the Sky", "X-Files", "Stargate", etc... so when we think of "alien" we see the Greys. Now, when people hallucinate, daydream, have a nightmare, etc... they picture the popular image for "alien". Its also sorta how the idea of what the UFOs themselves look like has changed. They all used to be flying saucers, but now there are more and more reports of triangle shaped UFOs.

TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER OR I,LL DISITIGRATE YOUR FACE EARTH NUT CASE