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August 11, 2005
MacGuyver Trap Catches Serial Panty ThiefA guy broke in to a couple's house five nights in a row to steal the wife's panties. . According to an affidavit filed in Garfield County District Court, husband Carlos set a trap for Taylor that would have made MacGyver proud. Using only a coffee cup, string, and a bra, Carlos nabbed Taylor (and then beat the intruder silly with a wooden leg taken off his baby's crib). Thanks to Ron. posted by Ace at 12:38 PM
CommentsHeh. Like the picture of the perp - nice going, Carlos! The only thing that would have made this story better is if the wooden leg had belonged to Carlos instead of the baby crib. Posted by: Wanda on August 11, 2005 12:42 PM
But Enid cops told TSG that they actually found his underwear stash--weighing in at an astonishing 55 pounds--stored in a large red cooler. Holy crap! I've never weighed my stash, but it could possibly be more than 10 lbs, max. Posted by: JFH on August 11, 2005 12:44 PM
Is there anything sadder than a baby with a wooden leg? Oh, wait...nevermind. Posted by: Sean M. on August 11, 2005 12:56 PM
Ace, I swear I don't know who this is. Cheers, Posted by: Dave from Garfield County on August 11, 2005 12:56 PM
I love Oklahoma. Lots of stupid people and nobody cares if you beat the living hell out of them. Posted by: spongeworthy on August 11, 2005 01:11 PM
OK, a long-distance semi-boyfriend once asked me to send him a pair of my panties. I sort of shrugged and thought, "Well, alright, don't know what exactly you want them for, but I'm a sport". So I sent him a brand new pair of panties, they were cute, lacy and pristine. Then, the phone call: "Uh, Lipstick, the idea was that you WEAR them first" Me: What?! Ugh!! Him: Never mind.
Posted by: Lipstick on August 11, 2005 01:13 PM
55 pounds of pilfered panties in his private poke? Pathetic pulchritude! Posted by: Monty on August 11, 2005 01:26 PM
Is Monty showing off his alliterative prowess, or is he just a big fan of the old Batman TV show? Posted by: JFH on August 11, 2005 02:07 PM
Holy uncalled-for-shots, Batman! Posted by: Monty on August 11, 2005 02:14 PM
...besides, there's no reason it can't be both. Posted by: Monty on August 11, 2005 02:15 PM
If the incident occurred in Canada, Monty would have had to write: 25 kilos of crotch coverings kept by klepto in cooler? Creepy Criminal! Posted by: JFH on August 11, 2005 02:18 PM
For shame Smoking Gun. Posted by: HowardDevore on August 11, 2005 02:35 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Whoops! I posted about Dan Goldman losing the NY congressional primary. He might do that, but it won't be tonight -- the primary isn't held until June 23.
One race to keep an eye on: the Levi's heir nepo baby and egregious "Designated Liar" Dan Goldman -- one of the Democrats from a safe district Democrats send out to spread their most indefensible lies -- may actually lose his lower Manhattan/Brooklyn set due to, get this, antisemitism in the Democrat primary electorate.
Antisemitism? In the anti-Nazi Democrat Party? Sounds crazy, I know, but apparently the anti-Nazi Party wants to eliminate Jews. Henry Rosoff Oh my Totenkopf Tattoo, that is a DRUBBING! I'm usually very anti-antisemitism but if the Communist Antisemite Jihadists can pull this one off, Go Communist Antisemite Jihadists, Go!
Democrat Senator Rueben Gallego, who served his wife with divorce papers when she was nine months pregnant so that he could marry his side-piece, counsels us that we should not judge Graham Platner for his infidelity because these things are personal matters, Racists:
Sahil Kapur I like that he says that it's okay that Graham Platner sexted 12 different women within months of marrying the woman to sponge off her because he wasn't then "living a political life" -- the clear meaning being, "We all cheat, we just don't cheat when we're running for office, and he didn't know he was running for office when he was sending dicpics to half the women he ran into." Except he was running: His own wife turned the sexts over to his campaign. And obviously Reuben Gallego didn't let his "political life" get in the way of his extramarital dating life: ![]()
Funny -- if you don't mind clicking on TikTok. "Amy.Pranks.22" set up an AI scam-call screener which replies to a foreign scammer trying to get her bank information with Trumpian bluster. This might be fake because I don't see how a program can respond in real time, but it's funny.
Food Thread Pizza Dough Recipe
The ULA rocket just launched
Thanks to Joyenz The rocket's enormous engines are fueled by "the volcanic heterosexual lust between James Talarico and his Neighbor With a Uterus 'girlfriend'" I hope Amazon's rocket works better than the Amazon Prime app does as far as allowing people to watch the black and white version of "Spider-Noir" From the CA Post: Thanks to beckster
Just like "Spartacus" Corey Booker, now that James Talarico is running for a higher office, he unveils his previously-unknown "girlfriend" and hooboy, it just so happens she used to work for him, and, get this, likes to "dance the night away" at gay bars
Gee I wonder where they might have met Oh and she's a vegan When Corey Booker needed a "girlfriend," he conjured up known LGBTQ activist Rosario Dawson. How convenient that when these guys need a girlfriend to show off to the normies that just happen to find an activist with a strong history of and interest in Supporting Gay Men But seriously, this James Talarico romance with a Neighbor with a Uterus is a love story for the ages. The passion of their lovemaking is hotter than a blue star with a core of Primordial Sex Atoms created in the Big Bang
And just like that, #PunchANazi became Punch a Ballot for a Nazi
"Teen" charged with five counts of attempted murder after attempting to run down police officers with his car in yet another "teen takeover" permitted by woke racist incompetent Chicago mayor Brandon Johnson
Johnson's response to the "teen takeovers" of streets and businesses that he refuses to make arrests to stop is to go after social media companies for not deleting messages to coordinate the "teen takeovers." Um, they're supposed to find these messages and delete them in real time? It makes no sense but he has to offer an "alternative" plan to just arresting lawbreakers -- which he absolutely refuses to do, saying we "can't arrest our way out" of rampant crime.
Future Tucker Carlson guest James Talarico:
James Talarico He's referring to three mass attacks committed by white men in, oh, the past six or eight years. There were a huge number of mass shootings and bombings he had to skip over to cherry pick three committed by white men. Which kind of makes me think that "white men" are not the greatest terrorist threat in our country. No, I doubt he'll be a guest on Tucker Carlson. The only thing that Tucker clings to that he claims makes him "conservative" is a palpable hatred of gays. Any time there's a communist enslaving their population and executing dissenters and conservatives, Tucker praises that dictator by saying "at least he represses the homos!"
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