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May 26, 2005
Weird Story of the DayYou tell me what's the weridest part: 1) There's a brothel preserved as a museum in (wait for it) Butte, Montana. Heh-heh. Heh heh heh. Heh heh heh. Butte. 2) Just as the New York Times was about to do a story on it, they open the doors for the reporter and find the cathouse museum to be the victim of illegal entry. It is suspected the thieves entered "through the back door." Heh-heh. Heh heh heh. Butte. Back door. Heh heh heh. 3) The thieves made away with "antique sex toys." Not really sure what that means, pre-latex, before the great leap forward in sex-toy technology. I'm figuring it's stuff like wooden hammers with which to smash yourself in the genitals. Meat tenderizers, so to speeak. Heh heh. Meat. Hey-- people were made of tougher stuff back then. 4) But the thieves cheesed it before making it to the upper levels, where more valuable prehistoric sex toys were kept. Why? "I think they got scared out as they were in the process," Giecek said. Look, when you're in a whorehouse, the clanking of chains and rhythmic moaning does not necessarily indicate an ectoplasmic intruder. Ectoplasm. Heh heh. Ghost choad. Heh heh heh. A heh heh heh heh huh huh heh. posted by Ace at 02:21 PM
CommentsDefinitely funny, but I think "Butte" is pronounced "byoot," which makes it not quite as funny. Posted by: Rocketeer67 on May 26, 2005 02:29 PM
Heh. Some days I just thank God you were born, Ace. Posted by: SarahW on May 26, 2005 02:34 PM
Sponsors! Come one! Come all! Posted by: fat kid on May 26, 2005 02:38 PM
Thieves scared by ectoplasmic intruder in Butte. Heh heh. Posted by: scootran on May 26, 2005 02:44 PM
Did you forget to take your meds today? Posted by: chickpea on May 26, 2005 02:47 PM
Kind of gives "Deadwood" a whole new meaning, huh? Heh heh. Wood. Whole. Heh heh. Posted by: WarrenM on May 26, 2005 03:04 PM
Ace, that's what we call an instant classic. I wonder if Vegas can give us an over/under on how many times you'll regurgitate that in the next year. Posted by: TheDude on May 26, 2005 03:04 PM
Thieves break into a haunted brothel...antique sex toys... ...anyone want to set the over/under on how long before there's a movie project with Paris Hilton attached? Posted by: Gib on May 26, 2005 03:29 PM
Wooden mallets? Ace, that's disgusting. I'm pretty sure that by the nineteenth century they had moved on to the steam-powered vibrator. The later, more compact models were no bigger than a Franklin stove. Posted by: utron on May 26, 2005 03:30 PM
Heh heh heh heh. Indeed. Heh heh. Posted by: Instabutthead on May 26, 2005 03:42 PM
Damn those Butte Burglars. Posted by: skinbad on May 26, 2005 03:44 PM
What is so funny about this post is how utterly juvenile Ace is. Posted by: tinkerbelle on May 26, 2005 06:21 PM
Settle down Beevis. Posted by: Beck on May 26, 2005 07:56 PM
Ace, Forget those antique sex toys. I want to hear about the prehistoric sex toys. Which T Rex Bone is required to really get the old "Dino gal" rocking? Bet the Earth really shook when Tyrannosaurus Rex and Raquel would find the mood (or the meteor) hit 'em. Subsunk Posted by: Subsunk on May 26, 2005 10:43 PM
I've been to the town and the museum. It's a pretty area and definitely worth a visit (just maybe not a long one.) Posted by: thefrank on May 27, 2005 10:18 AM
It's a pretty area and definitely worth a visit (just maybe not a long one.) Yeah. I figure I'll need about five minutes. Maybe seven, if it's cold that day. Posted by: Pompous on May 27, 2005 12:00 PM
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What is the UK Regime's plan for protecting the citizens from the savage criminals they've foisted on the populace? They offer NONE. They do, however, have a plan for protecting the savage criminals from the citizens: The citizens must STAY CALM and not get angry and not share videos of citizens being attacked by savage criminals. The public keeps saying "protect us from the foreign savages you have imported against our wishes and over our objections" and the UK branch of The Regime keeps proposing plans to protect the foreign savages from the public. Soclose to what the public is demanding, just, you know, the complete opposite. Just a thought: Maybe you wouldn't have to worry about the public attacking the savage criminals if you actually introduced a plan to protect the public from the savage criminals. Maybe they wouldn't feel as if it was necessary for them to protect the public through self-help.
Courtney Subramiam, one of the "journalists" who "previewed" her questions for the decrepit and demented Biden so that he could "answer" it with a pre-scripted response, rewarded by promotion to president of the White House Press Corps
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