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« Mooreover | Main | Smoke Nazis Fire Employees (WuzzaDem) »
January 25, 2005

Important Announcement (WuzzaDem)

Attention readers. Please be on the lookout for this man:

Dammit! I lost the picture. OK, well, he's about my height (all right, he's a little taller), chestnut hair, hazel eyes, sloppy dresser, a little overweight, wears a baseball cap all the time...no, not Michael Moore, I said chestnut hair.

Let's see, how can I describe him? Oh, I know! You know that movie where the mob guy's car blows up and he finds out who does it and tries to kill that guy's whole family for revenge, but there's a surprise ending? I don't want to say what the surprise ending is, because I hate spoilers, even when people use that stupid 'WARNING - SPOILER' crap, plus with it being Oscar nomination day and all. Anyway, he looks just like that guy's brother. Not his brother in the movie, his real brother - are you paying attention?

How else can I describe him? Wait, remember that post Ace did not long ago with the picture of the short guy standing with two women? Not the guy on the left, the other guy. He looks just like that guy, only picture him about thirty pounds heavier and three inches taller, different hair and eye color, worse posture, badly in need of a shave and with a baseball cap on his head. Got it? OK, that's who you should be on the lookout for.

Thanks in advance for your cooperation in this matter.

Posted by John from WuzzaDem. You think Ace would waste your time with something this stupid? What are you, an idiot?


posted by Ace at 01:32 PM
Comments



I think you just described Hoke Malokey.

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on January 25, 2005 01:49 PM

(on phone) "What's that, Ace?... send Vinnie to teach WuzzaDem some Concious?"

Posted by: Man of Substance on January 25, 2005 02:02 PM

I see him! I see him!

Posted by: TallDave on January 25, 2005 02:21 PM

Dave - were you paying attention?

Man - wuzzat?

Tall - That's not him!

Posted by: John from WuzzaDem on January 25, 2005 02:37 PM

Sounded like my wife giving driving directions.

Posted by: RapidTransit on January 25, 2005 03:56 PM

Is he, or she, so entangled in secular, i.e., rational, thought that he, or she, could not make tough decisions because he, or she, could see good reasons to do something or not do something and, thereby, be rendered inert?

Posted by: 72VIRGINS on January 25, 2005 03:57 PM

I hate to break it to you, WuzzaDem, but John Galt is only a fictional character. None of us has seen him.

Posted by: Guy T. on January 25, 2005 04:11 PM

OK, well keep your eyes peeled just in case.

Posted by: John from WuzzaDem on January 25, 2005 05:15 PM
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What? Skeleton of the most famous Musketeer, D'Artagnan, possibly discovered in Dutch church closet.
Dumas picked four names of real musketeers out of a history book, D'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos. So there was an actual D'Artagnan, though he made most of the story up. (Or, you know, all of it.)*
Charles de Batz de Castelmore, known as d'Artagnan, the famous musketeer of Kings Louis XIII and Louis XIV, spent his life in the service of the French crown.
The Gascon nobleman inspired Alexandre Dumas's hero in "The Three Musketeers" in the 19th century, a character now known worldwide thanks to the novel and numerous film adaptations.
D'Artagnan was killed during the siege of Maastricht in 1673, and there is a statue honoring the musketeer in the city. His final resting place has remained a mystery ever since.

A lot of Dumas's stories are based on bits of real history. The plot of the >Three Musketeers, about trying to recover lost diamonds from the queen's necklace, was cribbed from the then-almost-contemporaneous Affair of the Queen's Necklace. And the Man in the Iron Mask is based on real accounts of a prisoner forced to wear a mask (though I think it was a velvet mask).
* Oh, I should mention, Dumas says all this, about finding the names in an old book, in the prologue to his novel. But authors lie a lot. They frequently present fictions as based on historic fact. The twist is, he was actually telling the truth here. At least about these four musketeers having actually existed and served under Louis XIV.
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The Hobbit Challenge: Read two more chapters. I didn't have much time. Bilbo got the ring.
I noticed a continuity problem. Maybe. Now, as of the time of The Hobbit, it was unknown that this magic ring was in fact a Ring of Power, and it was doubly unknown that it was the Ring of Power, the Master Ring that controlled the others.
But the narrator -- who we will learn in LOTR was none of than Bilbo himself, who wrote the book as "There and Back Again" -- says this about Gollum's ring:
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In another passage, the ring is identified as a "ring of power."
I don't know, I always thought there was a distinction between mere magic rings and the Rings of Power created by Sauron. But this suggests that Bilbo knew this was a ring of power created by Sauron.
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I never noticed this before. I know Tolkien re-wrote this chapter while he was writing LOTR to make the ring important from the start. And also to make Gollum more sinister and evil, and also to remove the part where Gollum actually offers Bilbo the ring as a "present" -- Bilbo had already found it on his own, but Gollum was wiling to give it away, which obviously is not something the rewritten Gollum would ever do.
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