Charles Krauthammer Issues Conservative Bull: It's Okay for Ace of Spades HQ to Use the F-Bomb

I've been waiting for this dispensation for some time.

For the more potty-mouthed in the conservative movement, this new freedom is every as bit as important as Massacusetts marriage is to Andrew Sullivan.

It's a funny column, by the way.

Editor & Publisher notes the discrepancies in reports as to what vulgarity, precisely, Cheney used.

Everyone agrees that it was some sort of variant on the imperative form of an earthy colloqualism for "fornicate," but no one seems to agree on which particular form the instruction took. I heard it first, and most frequently, as "Fornicate yourself," no "go" preceeding it, and "yourself" rather than "you."

Which I kinda like, because really, who says that? No one I know. But I think maybe soon they will be.

The Washington Post, of course, reported Cheney's directive as "fuck you," all spelled out, only the third time in their history they've used this word in print.

This is the gayest way to report it. It's fuckin' gay because they're only printing this word for the third time ever because they think they can embarass Dick Cheney and alienate his conservative base from him.

For crying out loud. Do these jagwads think they can dance around singing "he said a dirty word, he said a dirty word" and swing an election?

You whining sissies.

Note they chose not to report the vulgarity all-spelled-out when John Kerry said it in a Rolling Stone article -- intending, of course, that it would be reported. They haven't been able to explain the disparity in their coverage. They claimed that Rolling Stone had different standards regarding vulgarity than they do, which is a non-sequitor, because the question wasn't about the difference between RS and the WP, but between the WP's own differing standards.

Ann Coulter has a term for this sort of media caterwauling. She calls it "feminine taunting." That's sexist. Let's call it girlish taunting. There's no need to demean women, but of course we'd prefer our media institutions to comport themselves with more seriousness and objectivity than junior high girls.

The New York Times reported it as an "obscene phrase."

This is trite and vague. It also makes no sense, in the context of New York Times' politics. This is the newspaper, remember, that is always arguing that flat-out hard-core pornography is not obscene (legally, "obscene" material may be censored or restricted by the government).

But F-yourself is an obscene phrase? Please. A vulgar phrase, yes. Obscene?

You know what's really obscene?

War.

George Carlin 60's liberal mode off.

The Boston Globe wins points for both accuracy and cheekiness by referring to the expletive as a "vulgar directive."

Vulgar directive. I like that.

Go vulgarly direct yourself, Senator.

Only the New York Post gets it right (at least as I've heard it), reporting the expression as "F- yourself."

Gee, now that that very-important issue is out of the way, can we get back to the really important issues?

Like Abu Ghraib and gay marriage, I mean.