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Podcast: Dolly Parton...an American classic, Michigan's El Sayed is part of our future destruction, More Global Warming nonsense, mail-in balloting restrictions, Darline Graham? Get rid of family dynasties...and more!
Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s
Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection.
This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday
1977 interview shows that Barbara Walters has always been a seaward and Dolly Parton always had "country class"
Walters actually asks Dolly Parton if she knows that people think she's a joke. This because Walters can't get over the fact that a show-woman has 1, big breasts, and 2, dresses a bit outrageously because, get this, she's an entertainer. A stage performer. You know, someone people pay money to see live and expect them to put on a show.
She never would attack Liberace for wearing glitter-tuxedos. But she's mad that Dolly Parton makes Barbara Walters look bad through association (by being a woman). Babs, you wish people associated the two of you. Believe me, we can tell the difference.
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Months ago, I reported that the final Zodiac cypher had been cracked and the name of the killer revealed. And the name of the killer turned out to be someone suspected in the unsolved Black Dahlia murder. The general tone of my mention of this was "serious you guys, this is real."
Well, it's not real. It's total bullshit.
Sorry about that. I did two things: 1, I bought into something, a conspiracy theory really, because it was new and exciting. And 2, I allowed a self-declared "expert" to snow me over with his "expert" claims about solving ciphers, an alleged expertise I could not challenge because I know practically nothing about codebreaking. I remember being similarly swindled by self-declared "experts" babbling about "chromatic aberrations." (Although I didn't really buy into that, but I found it "interesting" and I wasn't strongly skeptical about it. Hey they said they're "experts," they must know that they're talking about, right?)
I screwed up. It won't be the last time, I'm sure.
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December 16, 2015

A Brief Comparison of the Establishment's and Base's View of the GOP Hierarchy

What the Base thinks the GOP Hierarchy is:

1. The Establishment
2. Insiders and Major Donors
3. Lobbyists and Corporate Interests
4. The Base Voters

What the Establishment knows the GOP Hierarchy is:

1. The Establishment
2. Insiders and Major Donors
3. Lobbyists and Corporate Interests
4. Saudi Princes Loaded With Hookers and Blow
5. Illegal immigrant children
6. The parents of illegal immigrant children
7. Cousins of the parents illegal immigrant children
8. The pot dealer of the cousins of the parents of illegal immigrant children
9. The Corn Lobby
10. The Corn farmers
11. The corn. The actual stalks of fucking corn
12. The Ex-Im Bank
13. The Bank of America
14. Citibank
15. Banksy
16. Right-leaning Independent voters
17. Left-leaning Independent voters
18. "Our Democratic Friends across the aisle"
19. That wayward lad who shot Reagan who seems "persuadable"
20. People who haven't voted for a Republican since 1960
21. People who are barred from voting Republican because they were convicted of a felony
22. People who are barred from voting Republican because they were convicted of a felony and are also foreigners and also dead
23. Mohammad Atta
24. Other foreign terrorists
25. The illegal immigrant children of foreign terrorists
26. A stalk of corn once touched by the illegal immigrant children of foreign terrorists

and finally:

27. The base, aka "The Garbage People Who Embarrass Us So"


You see, it's all a difficult political balancing act.



posted by Ace at 03:24 PM