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Twitter rumors fly that Turkey's Islamist tyrant Erdogan is dead
Just rumors. Wonderful, wonderful rumors. Here's a long distance dedication from Dope called Die, M***erf****er, Die!
The American "news" media, not Russian Bots and not Trump, is responsible for sowing divisions and hatred in America, according to left-leaning centrist Tim Pool
I mention this because a mere 15 years ago, only ideologically engaged conservatives hated the media. Now everyone does.
Normies -- more or less apolitical, only-vote-in-presidential-elections normies -- now routinely roll their eyes at mention of the media. That's big.
Is Neil deGrasse Tyson really this dumb? [CBD]
The Inventor Who Fought To Get Black Box Flight Recorders Into Every Plane, and of all the resistance he encountered along the way. [dri]
Mark Dice dubs Little Brian Stelter on the White House social media summit
Little Brian Stelter's ratings have fallen 42%. I'm afraid for Mark Dice -- what's he gonna do when Tater gets shitcanned? Dice needs to start promoting Reliable Sources.
David Steinberg: The Washington Examiner stole the Omar story we had broken, without crediting us, and when I complained, they said we should just be happy that someone gave the story some coverage
Now former Babe.net writer Tiana Lowe says she merely salvaged the story from the "alt-right hacks" who had tainted it with their Nazi associations
Some take issue with this self-serving claim
It takes some cheek to imply that David Steinberg and the Powerline Guys, who are lawyers, are "alt-right hacks" who needed to have their story stolen from them -- without so much as a hat-tip! -- for the Greater Good. And now insults are piled on them to justify this.
I can't believe that an august publication like the Washington Examiner, which employs Seth Mandel, who took money too plant pro-Malaysia stories without disclosing this scheme to his readers, would countenance any kind of ethically-dubious behavior.
Report that a third tanker has been hijacked... I hear it's a Hong Kong ship. Also hearing that the British-owned ship (not the British flagged, Swedish owned ship) has been released with a "warning." So maybe they're picking on countries like Norway and Sweden that can't take the fight to them.
A friend says: "I wonder what course of action McCain would call for if he were still alive."
I'd like to think that McCain would begin an affair with his best friend's wife and break up that marriage and then divorce his cancer-ridden wife. But that's just me, I'm an incorrigible romantic!
Someone just chided me: "Don’t make jokes during the funeral. Have some taste."
Iran's hijacking British ships. Earlier they hijacked a Marshall Islands flagged ship (a US territory). But not German or French ships yet. I wonder if they're trying to split the response of the European bloc, hoping that France and Germany will continue their old support of Iran and old pattern of giving the finger to their ostensible US/UK allies.
50 years ago, Muhammed Ali wrote a letter to the parents of Mary Jo Kopechne.“Dear Mr. Kopechne, assert yourself in the interests of the good name of your daughter. Get yourself a good lawyer and sue that no good son of a bitch, Edward M. Kennedy, for everything he’s got,” [J.J. Sefton]
President of the American Vaping Association is a fan of the ONT and Misanthropic Humanitarian
Well, he's a fan of the ONT quoting him. Still -- I think that's something!
Can we start quoting Demi Rose, fellas? AIM HIGHER
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« Ex-JAG Officer: Kerry Dishonorably Discharged | Main | Movement Towards Kerry: Terrible Harbinger or Weekend Polling? »
November 01, 2004

Ace of Spades HQ Voter Issue Guide

FANTASY FILMS

BUSH: The Lord of the Rings, especially The Two Towers; Excalibur
KERRY: The Never-Ending Story; Fahrenheit 9-11


BASES OF SUPPORT

BUSH: blue-collar workers; the American Heartland
KERRY: nine members of Woody Allen's co-op board; the Sunni Triangle


EIGHTH GRADE ROCK ANTHEM

BUSH: Destroyer, aka "Paranoia," by The Kinks
KERRY: Foolish Heart, Journey, or Steve Perry, whoever the hell is responsible for that abortion


MINOR CELEBRITY SUPPORTERS

BUSH: George Thoroughgood and at least two (2) of the Delaware Destroyers
KERRY: All six actors who played Rum-Tum-Tugger in Cats (plus their understudies and the entirety of the hair & make-up people and costumers)


REPRESENTATIVE LYRIC FROM "SPINAL TAP"

BUSH: My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo/I wanna sink her with my pink torpedo
KERRY: Listen! (shhhhhh...!) to what the Flower People say ah-AH-ahhh-AAHH-Ahhh


COMIC SUPPORTERS

BUSH: Dennis Miller, Larry Miller, Drew Carey, Colin Quinn
KERRY: Margaret Cho, Al Franken, Jeneane Garofalo, "Balky" from Perfect Strangers


KEY MOVIE QUOTE

BUSH: (from Mickey Spillaine's I, the Jury)

LOVE INTEREST, AFTER HAVING BEEN SHOT AND MORTALLY WOUNDED BY MIKE HAMMER: How... c-c-could you?

MIKE HAMMER: It was easy.

KERRY: (from The Big Chill)

GLENN CLOSE: I really want you to bang my kinda-ugly best friend and knock her up. Because, you know, we all love each other so darn much!
'

ARCHAIC MILDLY-BLASPHEMOUS MIDDLE-AGES OATH

BUSH: Zounds! (derived from "God's Wounds")
KERRY: 'Snards! (derived from "God's Nards")

(Look, I'm sorry about that one, for any who might be offended. But really, that's how they used to curse. Take it from someone who played D&D in middle school.)


OBLIGATORY STAR WARS ANALOGY

BUSH: Luke and/or Boba Fett
KERRY: Lando and/or Greedo (Greedo endorses offering only the "threat of force," which turns out to be not-such-a-hot idea)


"COUPLES SKATE" ROLLER/ICE RINK SELECTIONS

BUSH: Somebody, Bryan Adams; or I Know What Boys Want, the Waitresses
KERRY: Careless Whisper, Wham; or R-O-C-K in the USA by John Cougar "Mellencamp"


SCI-FI QUOTE REGARDING WHAT TO DO WITH DANGEROUS ALIENS

BUSH: "I say we nuke them from orbit"
KERRY: "Let's study them! Who among us can say that these vicious man-eating creatures aren't worthy of our respect, friendship, and -- dare I say -- even... love?"


ICONIC HERO

BUSH: "Mad" Max Rocatansky ("Two men enter, one man leaves")
KERRY: Dr. Smith from Lost in Space ("Dear boy! Oh, stop your cantankerous clanking, you moronic mechanical monstrosity!")


GO-TO PROP IN TRYING TO SEDUCE A WOMAN
BUSH: Cowboy boots
KERRY: Chinese Etchings


"BRAT PACK" MOVIE CHARACTERS

BUSH: Ferris Buehler; Andrew McCarthy from St. Elmo's Fire
KERRY: John "No Dad what about you?!" Bender from The Breakfast Club; James Spader from Pretty in Pink; also, curiously enough, Ducky from Pretty in Pink (he has a lot of nuance, you see)


BELOVED CHILDHOOD CARTOONS

BUSH: Ricki Tikki Tavi; A Charlie Brown Christmas
KERRY: Free to Be You and Me; The Lorax


STEVE GUTTENBERG

BUSH: Steve Guttenberg from Police Academy (you just know Bush is a fan)
KERRY: Steve Guttenberg from anything else, but especially that godawful one with Shelley Long where he has Hodgkins but poses as some sort of Australian biker "rebel"

I Just Know There's More to This Premise Update! But I'm dry. If you've got a good one, drop it in the comments, and I'll compile the best of reader-submitted comparisons later tonight.


posted by Ace at 12:58 PM