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January 20, 2017

A New Dawn in America

John Ekdahl is counting down till noon with some observations:

You likely have milk in your refrigerator that has an expiration date longer than the Obama presidency.

The American Dental Association recommends changing your toothbrush every 3 months, or 180 times as long as Obama's remaining presidency.

RIP "poised for". Was a fun 8 years, but all things come to an end.

Any Amazon Prime order you make tonight will arrive when Obama isn't president.

A standard 12" dining table candle has an 11 hour burn time. Or, in more easily understood terms, less time than Obama's remaining term.

Rachel Maddow will never host another show on MSNBC while Obama is president.

There will never be another organic weekend farmers market under an Obama presidency.

A fun exercise: Think about what you want for lunch. Obama won't be president.

Do I stick to my diet and order a salad or cheat and get a burger? Silver lining: Obama will not be president.

The Warden/Code Red annouced his own plans to celebrate the New Freedom:

I'm going to f*** a hooker.

Tomorrow at noon, the air will smell a little sweeter, wine will taste a little stronger, and German pornography will feature slightly more urine.

What are your plans for marking the day? What are you the most grateful for, this most glorious day, this day when this loathsome c*nt (partly) departs our lives?

I feel like we're all heroes for just surviving this monster.

Helicopter retreating shot, cue George Harrison.



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posted by Ace at 01:20 AM

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