The 4am Club: Meet The Lunatic Women Who Believe We're In the "Wrong Timeline," Who Claim We Have to Get Back to the "Right Timeline" Where Kamala Harris Won the Election

Oh you stupid rural and Christian MAGA voters, why can't you be educated and sophisticated like leftwing women are?

You're probably thinking, "Oh, this is just a couple of dozen random lunatics on TikTok, it doesn't mean anything more than that."

But according to Suzy Weiss of The Free Press, these Tik Toks by floridly insane women garner millions of views.

As Weiss points out, if QAnon was a story for the leftwing media, this story of millions of AWFLs who all believe that the "timeline" split at 4am on election night between the "right timeline" where Kamala won and the "wrong timeline" where Trump won is just as much a story.

But something tells me that the leftwing Traitor's Press won't see it that way.

Suzy Weiss: If Kamala Harris Were President. . .

The 4 a.m. Club is made up of self-proclaimed witches, mystics, and mediums who believe we have been living in an alternate reality since November 6, 2024.

It's been another bizarre week, online and otherwise. While you, hopefully, were staring off into the ocean, or at least enjoying a cold beverage on a patio, I was tunneling deep into an alternate reality where Kamala Harris is president. Let me take you there.

The Left-Wing Version of QAnon Is Here

Let me object: The left-wing version of QAnon was already here. It is BlueAnon, the Democrats and media types (but I repeat myself) who believed every dotty conspiracy theory Rachel Maddow shat into their mouths and still believe in RussiaGate, despite overwhelming evidence that it was a fiction ordered up by Hillary Clinton.

Are we heading toward World War III? Not according to Gia Prism, a self-proclaimed psychic, and the founder of a movement that's the closest thing the left has to QAnon.

It's called the "4 a.m. Club."

It isn't about getting up before the sun to go on a run or to get a head start on work, but rather a confederation of spiritually inclined women who all claim to have woken up suddenly around 4 a.m. on November 6 with a sinking feeling that Donald Trump had won the election. Checking their phones, their feminine intuitions were confirmed.

Except that they don't really believe that he won. Stick with me here. The 4 a.m. Clubbers believe that, really, we might be living in an alternate reality where Trump is president. At 4 a.m. on November 6, 2024 is when the timelines "split." And it's only a matter of time before we all realize it and get back on the "correct" timeline, where Trump failed and Harris took her rightful place as chief executive.

"I have been steadfast, so rock-solid in my belief that she won, and it was only a matter of time before we all got onto that timeline," said one member, @KelleyDaring, who posts on TikTok. "My friends have looked at me like I'm crazy and told me I'm delusional."

And then she found the others just like her. "Those of us in the 4 a.m. Club viscerally experienced that timeline split."

"This is the vision, this is the light that we have been holding," another 4 a.m.-er explained.

There are hundreds of videos with millions of views on 4 a.m. Club videos on TikTok, and additional chatter on left-wing Reddit; and their popularity has only grown since Trump's inauguration. A lot of them are made by self-proclaimed witches, mystics, mediums, clairvoyants, intuitives, and the like. Many, it seems, are nurses with autoimmune disorders.

Yes, the many women who claim to have persistent diseases with very vague symptoms (that pretty much just sum up to "I feel the blahs, I have low energy, and do not take joy in my life") that no doctors are ever capable of diagnosing.

I am not saying that autoimmune disorders are fake, by the way. I know they're real. But it's also a syndrome with many vague and hard-to-pin-down symptoms that simple hypochondriacs tend to glom on to. Hypochondriacs and Munchausen Syndrome people do not claim to have easily-identifiable ailments like a broken shinbone. No, there's an easy test for that. It's always vague stuff like "I just don't feel good" and "I just feel sad a lot." Only certain maladies offer this kind of vague complaint, and they're choosing "autoimmune disorder" en masse to justify their lifelong malingering.

Basically, the 4 a.m. Club is QAnon, but for left-wing women on TikTok who believe they are receiving messages from God in the passenger seat of their Toyota Siennas.

Just as QAnon believed the 2020 election was stolen from Trump, the 4 a.m. Club believes it was stolen from Harris in 2024; both movements see it as their job to alert the rest of the country to what's happening right under their noses.

According to 4 a.m. Club doctrine, it's just a simple matter of collapsing the timelines, so that we enter the correct one, where Harris is the president--in other words, where the Divine Feminine wins."

"It's more than just waking up that morning," says one 4 a.m Clubber. "It's actually about a Great Awakening."

One of these lunatics is going to try to kill the president, imagining this will "collapse the timeline" just like measuring a particle collapses the probability function.

Whereas the most exciting thing in the QAnon world is getting "drops" from "Q"--the supposedly high-ranking but anonymous government official who released predictions about the deep state on 8chan--4 a.m.-ers get "downloads" from "Spirit." As in, Gia got "messages from Spirit about the spiritual purpose of what's happening with ICE." Sometimes, 4 a.m.-ers refer to multiple "spirit guides," which show them visions of Harris's victory (she wore a pin-striped purple pantsuit), or telling them which members of Trump's administration will eventually be prosecuted (Pam Bondi, Marco Rubio, Kristi Noem).

Below, "Gia," one of the "psychic intuitives" and Timeline Witches who claims that she had a feeling that Trump would win the 2024 election at 4am in the morning so she knew that the timeline was "splitting."

By the way, everyone in the country knew Trump would win by 4am; he had been projected to win the election by like 1:30 am.

But she was psychic because she saw a tweet when she woke up.

That video doesn't have a lot of views but Tik Tok is, of course, where all the real feminine insanity breeds and festers.

But I can't link Tik Tok, and it's a Chinese spyware site anyway.

But a Tik Tok is embedded in this article. "Gia Nightshade" or whatever her fake Witch Name is says she's gotten 12,000 new subscribers overnight.

"In the clerb we all awake," one comment beneath Prism's video read. "4 am club here but are we all just so exhausted?" another added. With so much on the line, the 4 a.m. club isn't about spiritually bypassing the election results; members say it's a call to action.

You're all exhausted because you are lazy and you don't want to work but you are feminists who are told you must work so you invent fake diseases to explain why working makes you tired and not Empowered like your idiot Witch-Leaders told you it would.

Ask any guy. We're all tired from working too. We just don't make up Fake Diseases to explain this completely-predictable result of working for a living. We just expect to be worn out by work, not Magically Empowered.

"My content focuses equally on spiritual perspectives and healing opportunities as well as social justice and political activism," Prism tells Fast Company. She hosts group healing meditations but also encourages participation in the physical world: attending protests, donating to causes, and speaking truth to power. There's even merch.

They also have unwavering hope for the future. "We do not believe that the results we see now are the results we're going to end up with," Prism said in a video posted in December 2024. "We have a higher hope, and the reason we have a higher hope is because we were part of something unexplainable that happened to us on election night, and that is why we call it the 4 am Club."

I'm telling you one of these unmarriageable batty wallflowers is going to start shooting people to jump-start the "timeline collapse."

posted by Ace at 04:30 PM

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