Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support
Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Recent Entries
The Morning Report — 12/3/24
Daily Tech News 3 December 2024 Monday Overnight Open Thread (12/2/24) - Doof A Case of the Mondays Cafe Congressional Report: "Scientists" At Heart of Creating Covid-19 In Wuhan Decieved Congress, May Face Prosecution Quick Hits Leftwing UK PM Keir Starmer: Damn These Conservatives For Unleashing This Dangerous Uncontrolled Mass Immigration On Us! Trump Nominates Revealer of the Russiagate Psyop Kash Patel to be New Director of the FBI Dave Reaboi: Why Did the Left Tell Antifa To Stand Down After Trump's Victory? "Showbiz Source:" George Clooney "Fuming" That Barack Obama "Manipulated" Him Into Calling for Biden's Ouster So That Our First Homosexual President Could Keep His Hands Clean Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups
|
« Thread Below the Gardening Thread [Y-not] |
Main
| Ace of Spades Pet Thread [Misanthropic Humanitarian] »
April 02, 2016
Saturday Gardening Thread: April Fools [Y-not and KT]Good afternoon, gardening morons and moronettes! Today's thread is brought to you by the cabbage:
In honor of April Fools Day (which was yesterday, for those of you lacking a calendar), here are few hoaxes, tricks, and silliness from the plant-world. I doubt it escaped the Morons' attention, but nearly escaped mine... yesterday this happened:
(Safe link to Mashable.) Plant Hoaxes Courtesy of Hoaxes.org a list of plant life that only existed on April 1st. I liked this one: The German Gardener's News, edited by Herr Moller, issued an April Fool's Day edition that discussed various botanical discoveries. For instance, it was revealed that scientific investigation had discovered varieties of flowers that were so phosphorescent they gave sufficient light to read by. "Under proper conditions the flowers of the clematis glow like stars, while sunflowers, if correctly nurtured, make it quite possible to read a newspaper by their unaided light." An accompanying photograph showed Herr Moller reading by the light of sunflower lamps in his garden at 10 o'clock at night. But wait, there's more! Flash-forward a century and you'll find that that hoax may become a reality: Hoping to give new meaning to the term "natural light," a small group of biotechnology hobbyists and entrepreneurs has started a project to develop plants that glow, potentially leading the way for trees that can replace electric streetlamps and potted flowers luminous enough to read by. You can read about the state of their project as of last year. Spaghetti Tree One of the most famous hoaxes of all time is from a 1957 British television broadcast of the Spaghetti Harvest: The Swiss Spaghetti Harvest hoax generated an enormous response. Hundreds of people phoned the BBC wanting to know how they could grow their own spaghetti tree. To this query the BBC diplomatically replied, "Place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best." To this day the Panorama broadcast remains one of the most famous and popular April Fool's Day hoaxes of all time. It is also believed to be the first time the medium of television was used to stage an April Fool's Day hoax. As we saw with the glowing sunflower, the "spaghetti tree" is almost a reality. Although there is no spaghetti tree, one can mimic that by growing spaghetti squash on a trellis or an arch. More ideas at this blog post. I have to admit, I'm a bit skeptical about growing spaghetti squash this way because it just seems too large for it to work. Have any of you tried growing spaghetti squash or other large squashes this way? I'm particularly curious because last week we finally had our fence completed, complete with a pergola, so we are still looking for ideas of vines to try. We're in Zone 6b and have deep red clay soil. I'm thinking of using white planter boxes so I don't have to struggle with our soil. (The lumps of dirt the fencing contractors dug up are like terra-cotta when they dry out!) Fooled You Pepper Plants KT has covered peppers quite a few times during past Gardening Threads, but here's one I don't recall her covering: the Fooled You Pepper Plant: Jalapenos contribute a particular flavor all their own to cuisines ranging from Mexico to South America to Asia. Originally a South American native, evidence suggests peppers were domesticated as early as 3300 B.C. and were grown in North America by the 16th century. Since jalapenos are best recognized for their heat, heartburn suffers may have reluctantly eliminated the tasty treats from their diets, but the "Fooled You" pepper brings back the flavor without the pain. I imagine a bunch of you die-hards are screaming "Sacrilege!" right now, but I am curious if any of you have tried these peppers. I enjoy spicy foods, but sometimes I really do just want the flavor without the pain. Are these any good? Speaking of flavorful peppers without all of the heat, if you haven't tried them before, I can recommend both Shishito and Padron peppers. Shishitos are becoming more commonplace at Japanese restaurants. Padrons can be found on occasion at Spanish (not Mexican) restaurants. Both can prepared simply. Here's one method, but they also do well on the grill or sauteed in olive oil. I've successfully grown each when I was living in Utah. I assume they'd do well here in Kentucky since it seems most peppers like warm climates. More Plant Trickery Speaking of plant hoaxes, here's something: According to Discovery News, the South African Ceratocaryum argenteum, which looks like a grassy shrub, has evolved to produce seeds that look and smell like the droppings of antelope, a prime source of food for dung beetles who typically roll the feces into a ball and bury it for later consumption. This means that the plant is basically fooling the beetle into planting its seeds in a ball of fertilizer, which, in turn, generates another Ceratocaryum argenteum taking root. Many plants are masters of deception. You can read about some others here. Not A Hoax Finally, believe it or not, this is not a hoax:
Proving that there is a customer for nearly every product (except Trump Vodka), Mystery Potatoes are a thing. (On a related note, another would-be entrepreneur was less successful.) I don't see the appeel! (Har-dee-har-har) Now, heeere's KT: Dandy Lions Thanks to the fine research of Misanthropic Humanitarian, I learned that Monday was National Weed Appreciation Day. This is a celebration whose origin seems to have been lost in some misty, weed-choked recess of the internet. Have you taken a moment to appreciate a weed lately? How about the dandelion? Do you remember as a small child the fun you had with dandelions? They actually serve many useful purposes. . . Last week, one of our Gardening Morons had been picking dandelion greens for a delicious Easter salad with Pennsylvania Dutch Hot Bacon Dressing. For those who love dandelions, here is a summary page on their benefits, uses, precautions and possible interactions from the University of Maryland Medical Center. Do you like dandelions or maybe resent them? I have never made a Dandy Lion from dandelions, but I was intrigued by them as a child. I made straws for drinking milk from the stems, after blowing the seeds with their little parachutes away. I ate the sepals (well, the inner bracts) from dandelion flower buds. The leaves were too bitter for me. I also spent time as a child helping my father rid the lawn of dandelions. A fair number of gizmos have been invented primarily for this task. And those are just the non-chemical controls. I remember a long tube you filled with water and an effervescent 2,4-D tablet. Then you walked around bouncing a spring-loaded trigger tip on dandelion plants, which would get all funny and curly before they died. Anybody else remember something like that? If you would rather eat dandelions than fight them but you don't want to gather just any old wild plants from the north side of the barn, you can buy seeds for culinary strains. They generally have larger leaves and are more upright than wild dandelions. Cultivated dandelions are sometimes tied for a few days before harvest to blanch the inner leaves (to reduce bitterness). One cultivar is said to be self-blanching. I expect that keeping the plants well-watered would also help moderate bitterness. Speaking of wild dandelions, there is an endangered California Dandelion. Just to make things confusing, there is also a large-flowered plant of a different genus known as the "California Dandelion". It is not endangered. The endangered California Dandelion can cross-breed with common dandelions, further endangering it. The endangered dandelions look pretty much like common dandelions too. They grow in sort of marshy areas. There are two species in the genus Taraxacum which are commonly found as weeds in our yards and gardens. Both are entirely edible. They have some interesting anatomical features. The little parachutes that form on the seeds develop from specialized sepals surrounding the many individual flowers in each flower head. Seeds can form asexually. No pollination is needed, even though the flowers are often visited by bees and skipper butterflies. The round seed heads covered in little parachutes are called, appropriately, "blowballs". I guess the French sometimes use dandelion flower buds as substitutes for asparagus tips. You can make an intense yellow dye from the flowers, or an intense magenta dye from the entire plant. Then there are the more common uses, such as salads, soups, etc. Maybe someone has a favorite recipe. From the Wiki: The flower petals, along with other ingredients, usually including citrus, are used to make dandelion wine. The ground, roasted roots can be used as a caffeine-free dandelion coffee. Dandelion was also traditionally used to make the traditional British soft drink dandelion and burdock, and is one of the ingredients of root beer. But perhaps you would like to avoid one of the "spring tonic" effects of the dandelion, which inspired the French to bestow upon it the delicate name "Pissenlit". There are some other salad greens with dandelion-like leaves. Some would extend the "dandelion" season. Italian dandelions are actually a type of chicory. Some cultivars have red stems. Other dandelion stand-ins include wild arugula and a few strains of regular arugula bred to resemble wild arugula. There are also some new, piquant mustards that look a lot like dandelions. Let me know in the comments if you are interested in seed sources. Quick Hits It looks like the Farmer's Almanac is helping us prepare for the Zombie Apocalypse. There are several garden denizens in their list of Ten Edible Bugs and How to Eat Them. . . . "10. Pillbugs (sowbugs)—an insect related to lobster and shrimp. Boil or sautee briefly in butter." How to safely transition Meyer Lemon Trees from indoors to outdoors. I wonder why lemons remind me of spring? Happy Spring, Horde! Y-not: Thanks, KT! To close things up, FEED ME:
| Recent Comments
I used to have a different nic:
"[i]I don't think PDT is going to waste a bunch of ..."
Lady in Black[/i][/b][/u]: " I understand that Joe pardoned Hunter for a speci ..." Jonah: "So the new Congress gets sworn in on Jan 3rd? S ..." Hadrian the Seventh: " [i]Trump has repeatedly said he believes abortio ..." Quarter Twenty : "Every morning I thank the Father he has given my s ..." Bulg: "Mornin’, All. Happy Tuesday. ..." Notsothoreau: "Bring back lunch ladies! Give them recipes to cook ..." Cuthbert the Witless: "91 Hunter's passport will be flagged by Kash Patel ..." actually inside the beltway: "Good morning, thank you JJ for another fine mornin ..." Unknown Drip Under Pressure: "[i]I don't think PDT is going to waste a bunch of ..." no one of any consequence: "If not treason, certainly insubordination. ..." Ciampino - Less dangerous in MX than in China?: "The “cooks” are tasked with improving ..." Recent Entries
The Morning Report — 12/3/24
Daily Tech News 3 December 2024 Monday Overnight Open Thread (12/2/24) - Doof A Case of the Mondays Cafe Congressional Report: "Scientists" At Heart of Creating Covid-19 In Wuhan Decieved Congress, May Face Prosecution Quick Hits Leftwing UK PM Keir Starmer: Damn These Conservatives For Unleashing This Dangerous Uncontrolled Mass Immigration On Us! Trump Nominates Revealer of the Russiagate Psyop Kash Patel to be New Director of the FBI Dave Reaboi: Why Did the Left Tell Antifa To Stand Down After Trump's Victory? "Showbiz Source:" George Clooney "Fuming" That Barack Obama "Manipulated" Him Into Calling for Biden's Ouster So That Our First Homosexual President Could Keep His Hands Clean Search
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings) George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer Top Top Tens
Democratic Forays into Erotica New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party" Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?" Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance Collective Names for Groups of People John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive" Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments John Edwards Campaign Excuses John Kerry Pick-Up Lines Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney Torments in Dog-Hell Greatest Hitjobs
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny More Margaret Cho Abuse Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed" Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means Wonkette's Stand-Up Act Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report! Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet The House of Love: Paul Krugman A Michael Moore Mystery (TM) The Dowd-O-Matic! Liberal Consistency and Other Myths Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate "Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long) The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) |