Silly Post and Then One More and I'm Out

Okay, so for whatever reason, I started goofing on Eurovision last night. The poor idiots have this continent-wide contest to find The Best Song In Europe.

Exactly once they found a worthy winner -- ABBA, singing Waterloo.

Every other time it's been a transnational embarrassment.

For example, look at these fucking jokers singing a song called, of course, "No Prejudice." This is officially the best song in Iceland in 2014. National voting says so.

Here's the Best Song in All of France in 2014: (I Want to Have a) Mustache. As you can see, it's an Andy Samberg Digital Short, except in French. It's silly. I mean, it's fine to do silly songs.

But this is the Best Song in All of France, 2014?

This is what France brought to the table, artistically, in 2014?

So I'm goofing on these songs, alternatingly mediocre and outright horrible, and then I come upon something... special.

What I'm talking about is the Best Song of Poland 2014.

I started watching this and I was... moved.

The song is called something like "My Slowenie," which means something like "My Slavic Girls" or Slavic Girls or whatever. It's a bump-and-grind number promoting the idea that Polish girls (or Slavic girls generally) are awesome for sex.

No seriously that's what the song's about.

It's not so much a song as a three minute advertisement for East European Escort Services.

The girls are dressed like Peasant Hookers. Okay, that's provocative enough.

But then, during the song, two girls busty girls come out, and...

Well, I shouldn't spoil it. Discovering the magic is the whole fun of magic.

So that's their live performance.

Curious about this "song" from Poland that seems to have been produced by human traffickers to advertise their wares, I looked around for other versions.

I found the official video - not the live performance. But the video they shot for the song.

It's... something. Worse than the live performance, I'll tell you that.

It's pretty much just porn. And/or the end theme to Taken 2.

I still need time to process how I feel about what I've just seen.

posted by Ace at 06:12 PM

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