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August 28, 2013
Peabody Award Alert: ABCNews Proudly Runs Headline, "Twerking: A Scientific Explanation"Parody is dead. You can't parody them. An ABC Health/Science correspondent wrote this. If this appeared in the Onion, you'd say "too silly." Twerking is such a complex, technical subject, only a Ph.D. researcher can explain how the body does what it does to make it happen. And etc. I'm glad ABCNews' science correspondent is up on all the medical lingo, like "butt." Via Twitchy, which collects up a lot of goofing on #ABCreports.
Oh and speaking of not being pardoizable, The Onion attempted to parody CNN, writing a column explaining why Miley Cyrus was their Big Top Story all day yesterday, but the parody guest editorial is simply the straight truth. Now, let's get back to why we put the story in the most coveted spot on our website, thereby saying, essentially, that Miley Cyrus’ suggestive dancing is the most important thing going on in the world right now. If you clicked on the story, and all the slideshows, and all the other VMA coverage, that means you’ve probably been on CNN.com for more than seven minutes, which lowers our overall bounce rate. Do you know what that is? Sorry for getting a little technical here. The bounce rate is the percentage of visitors to a particular website who navigate away from the site after viewing only one page. If we can keep that bounce rate low, and show companies that people don’t just go to CNN.com but stay there, then we can go to Ford or McDonald’s or Samsonite or whatever big company you can think of and ask for the big bucks. Well it is on them too. Via @rdbrewer4, from the sidebar, Camille Paglia diagnoses the malady in pop culture. She's still ga-ga for Madonna -- she will never get over that silliness -- but otherwise she's clear-minded about shock without value.
Pornography has always existed in society, but what might be called "mainstream porn" -- thrills and naughtiness that might appear in respectable venues -- used to require merit to excuse it. A Henry Miller book might be trashed as pornographic, but its defenders would point to its literary merit as a reason to keep it off the banned lists. Incidentally, the fact that it was both pornographic and meritorious made it interesting, as it existed in two categories usually thought to be contradictory; this makes such things compelling, that they actually do "challenge our preconceptions" about the boundary between trash and treasure. We have now officially dispensed with that requirement. Did Miley Cyrus challenge any preconceptions? Oh Hellz no. She reinforced them. She didn't make things more complicated, and therefore interesting; she made them simpler, and therefore less. But of course this isn't really Miley Cyrus' fault. There will always be deranged people willing to behave in lunatic fashion in public. The problem is that the... oh, they've called themselves The Gatekeepers before, haven't they? Let's use that word then. The Gatekeepers, the executives and flunkies who have made pop culture their lives, and therefore should be experts in such matters, are simply stupid and without taste or standards. That Miley Cyrus wanted to perform analingus on a Teddy Bear does not have broader implications. There have always been flashers. There have always been pornographers. What has a very broad implication is that MTV -- a unit of Viacom, which also owns CBS, once and nevermore called "The Tiffany Network" (update: Nope, Viacom and CBS split in 2006; thanks, BrokenNewsMikey) -- decided this would be a splashy, ratings-boosting bit of naughty fun for the Children of the World. And make no mistake, adults do not watch MTV; children do. Tweeners. Even when MTV was "cool" -- it was never cool, by the way -- but even when it was new enough that kids thought it was "cool," they learned, as they departed their tweener years and became older teenagers, that the channel was for kids and not for them. And they moved on to stuff that older kids and grown ups liked. MTV can say "we've always had our critics." Indeed you have. Everyone 16 or older was a critic. Everyone 16 or older soon realized that when MTV called itself a "youth channel" they meant youths of 12 years old. No self-respecting 16 year old wants to be all ga-ga over something his 11 year old kid sister loves. I wrote about this general, terrible trend over at Breitbart some time ago.
When even a teen girl's magazine is celebrating "'batin'" -- instructing teen girls how to masturbate for older married men -- then our society is now championing an essentially animal-level existence. Not just in terms of morality -- the bien pensants will always scoff at such a bourgeois construction -- but also in terms of intellect. Something the bien pensants once pretended to be interested in championing. Correction on that: The magazine I was writing about, XOJane, turned out not to be a magazine for "teen girls" (that was Jane Pratt's earlier magazine, Sassy), but for young women. Supposedly. You know, the actual audience is always younger than the officially announced audience. | Recent Comments
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