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June 13, 2013

Florida Woman Greatly Overestimates Public Outrage over Local Dunkin Donuts Franchise's Failure to Give Her a Receipt

So, if I understand this right, Dunkin Donuts has a policy that if they fail to give you a receipt, you get your order for free.

Dunkin Donuts apparently did not give this lovely woman a receipt. When she asked for her money back for her order, they told her that she'd have to come back tomorrow, and they'd give her the same order, for free, tomorrow. But for whatever reason they didn't want to refund her. They interpreted their guarantee as "next time it's on us" rather than "we'll reimburse you on the spot."

Okay, fair enough, that's... slightly annoying, but less annoying if you are, like this woman, a regular customer who comes in every day. You also have to bear in mind that if you ask the typical register-worker for anything complicated, they're going to say "I can't do that without a manager."

I mean, you ever try to get a credit card charge reversed at a drug store? My God, it's an ordeal. You almost just want to say, "You just keep the thirty eight dollars for yourself. Buy yourself something nice with it. Maybe some Doctor Scholl's Orthopedic Shoe Inserts and a Zagnut bar."

But anyway, she was offered the guarantee a day late.

She's rather outraged over this. Furthermore, she believes this situation requires the services of Her Lawyer, and assures everyone that Her Lawyer is involved and will be On the Case.

Not only is Her Lawyer very interested in The Case, but she also believes that random strangers in the store, and the entire internet at a large, should be likewise outraged in The Ordeal of the Receipt and the associated Rape of the Delayed Guarantee, and promises all and sundry that she's about to "go to Mars" on them and "nuke this place to Mars" because "We are going Liiiiive."

Frequent profanity and racial slur Warning.

Is it worth watching...? Ehhhhhh... it goes on a while. If you like people throwing up Stupid all over themselves, it's worth it. Sorta.

h/t to @tommyxtopher, who wrote a COLUMN about this Affair of the Receipt.

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posted by Ace at 06:27 PM

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