Sponsored Content

Intermarkets' Privacy Policy

« No, Senator Boxer, I Think We'll Stick With "ClimateGate" | Main | Overnight Open Thread (Mætenloch) »
December 02, 2009

Cool Animal News: How Killer Whales "Karate Chop" Sharks

Since I was a kid, I read that killer whales somehow killed sharks by stunning them or something. Never got the details straight. I thought it was some kind of headbutt to the gut or something.

In fact, it turns out they raise their tails to the surface near a shark, which creates a vortex that whisks the shark up to the surface, where I guess it can't breathe or something. Then they pull their tails up clear out of the water and "chop" them, smashing down.

Okay, kind of cool. But the thing is, this wasn't the way I envisioned it as a kid. Because, okay, maybe this is a cool tactic, and maybe it means they're using their brains or something, but the killer whales seem to have another impressive advantage over their shark-victims:

They're about 3-5 times larger than the sharks they're hunting.

You know what other tactics work when you have that kind of size advantage? All other tactics. Including plainly stupid ones.

Hey, try brute force, too, guys. No real need to get all finesse-y when you're bullying a poor little shark you've got a good three bills on.

Remember when Mike Tyson beat the hell out of me last year? You know how did that? He out-thought me. He came ready with a plan and I didn't.

Also, he hit me once and it turned my brain into gray applesauce.

But that, and out-thinking me.

Ah, one more lie of youth dies. One more jewel of innocence cracked and shattered. What's left?

Thanks to rdbrewer.

Oh: I'm informed what the orcas do is flip the sharks over on their backs with that vortex-move, which somehow discombobulates their brains and puts them into a daze, and I'm also informed that male commenters are so over Meredith Baxter and now all over Dr. Ingrid Visser.

digg this
posted by Ace at 08:45 PM

| Access Comments

Recent Comments
m: "396 The pitifulness of our time isn't that we will ..."

Sock Monkey * Ungovernable : "Still waiting for the NCAA to start televising wom ..."

Ordinary American: "The pitifulness of our time isn't that we will col ..."

Puddleglum : "(sips coffee) Thanksgiving posting is a bit lig ..."

"Content": "Re tents: Spent 100s of nights under tarps in th ..."

m: "389 Mornin' (sips coffee) Posted by: Puddleglum ..."

Sock Monkey * Ungovernable : "Mornin' (sips coffee) Posted by: Puddleglum ..."

Sock Monkey * Ungovernable : "A couple of dishes of food for thought . Let me pr ..."

Rusty Nail: "Regarding the cause of death attributed to vomitin ..."

Puddleglum : "Mornin' (sips coffee) ..."

Braenyard's phone: "Japan is considering using an enemy base strike ca ..."

Teresa in Fort Worth, AOS Ladies' Team plucky comic relief: "[I]Ask me what I did this past 4th of july? Poste ..."

Recent Entries

Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64