Osama Releases New Old Tape Boldly Declaring, "Are You All Fucking Retarded? Wake Up, Chumps -- I've Been Dead For Two Years! And I Thought Weekend At Bernie's Was Actually Far-Fetched!" | Main | BSG News
March 19, 2008

No Sex, Please, We're Japanese: Japan Gives Up On Sex Almost Entirely

Sex with humans, at least. Plastic vaginas and giant space tentacle rapists still get their share.

Well, it took a while, but we finally have them right where we want them.

Pearl Harbor doesn't seem quite as funny now, does it?

apan is having a birth rate crisis - because the nation has gone off sex, it has been revealed.

A quarter of married couples in Japan have not made love in the past year, according to the World Health Organisation.

The country's birth rate is already among the lowest in the world and is falling even further.

Although there is no comparable data for other countries, earlier surveys suggest Japan is among the world's least sexually active nations.

...

On the brighter side, sex was most frequent among young married people in Japan.

The survey found that 42.2% of couples in their 20s who had lived together for less than five years had sex at least once a week.

Umm... that's still not all that great, is it?

Part of of the problem, according to experts, is that when couples even attempt intimacy, they tend to be interrupted by large-breasted Japanese swimsuit models kicking in a door-panel and attempting to squeeze their way in, as seen in the following educational video:


On top of that: Godzilla.

Oh Yeah... Synova reminds me of this.

Another problem facing Japan is that many Japanese men do not even know how to engage in procreative sex, instead indulging in the ancient art of shikato ze nogoto, or "Fucking the Wind."

digg this
posted by Ace at 10:41 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Insomniac - Getting Microaggressed on the Daily, Yo!: "Another good one for the Food Thread. Anyone famil ..."

Sandra F.: "[i]That means they're really being hard if Jimmy c ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "Are we now lactophilia intolerant? Posted by: buz ..."

Lost Shaker Assault: "I've been a chef, cook, and restaurant manager 35 ..."

Donna&&&&V sez: Sorry Tribe fans. Go Astros!: "Not entirely OT, here is a vid of some sane - and ..."

Cosmic Charlie: "Tina Weymouth was extraordinary ..."

buzzsaw90: "One word: lactophilia. And celebrity chefs. Pu ..."

filbert: "[i]"Diversity" by itself is valueless. A bucket of ..."

Insomniac - Getting Microaggressed on the Daily, Yo!: "508 Let's face it, diversity is weakness, straight ..."

colfax mingo: "Eromero, Not a poet, but not a bullshitter eith ..."

Mike Hammer, etc., etc.: "It starts with lactophilia, then, the pudding. ..."

publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear: " Another good one for the Food Thread. Anyone fa ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64