An Open Letter of Sorts to New Orleans | Main | 4.0: Economy Posts Sweet GPA For Second Quarter
August 30, 2007

Milwaukee Mystery

Defense attorney receives the severed head of a goat in a pink gift bag.

Presented with such a lovely gift, most seasoned attorneys would squeal with joy and suck the eyes out like escargot.**
And then dial up the Dark Lord on their cauldron of fire and thank Him for the bonus.

But this particular lawyer decided to issue a cryptic statement instead:

"August 27 was a full moon, and also was a lunar eclipse. It is also my understanding there haven't been any of our elected officials' sons or daughters charged with slashing tires or voter fraud. And since I haven't invented any new criminal defenses for any of my clients in the last few months, I assume the individual was trying to get my attention."

She defended one of the guys who was convicted of slashing Republican campaign workers' tires before the 2004 election. I don't know about you, but I get the impression she's wacky. And probably not very good in court.

**Helpful Hint: If you need to send a gift to a lawyer, you'll find that a bag of severed goat heads makes attorneys very, very happy. Try it and see. And don't forget to attach a personal note!


digg this
posted by Laura. at 11:10 AM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Geddy Lee: "It's the colour of your heartbeat A rising summer ..."

Common Tater: "It's my understanding that the archaeological reco ..."

Deplorable Jay Guevara[/i][/s][/b] : "[i]Camouflage: I was walking near the Colorado riv ..."

Lysenko - Be happy that you're being killed by a good man instead of being left alone by a bad man. : "Wrong chick. ** You leave my reality alone ..."

Dworkin Barimen - anarcho-tyranny? you're soaking in it!: ">Donald and Melania both got the covid shots But ..."

BignJames: ""Accused of"...when do we get "Charged with" ? ..."

Duke Lowell : "I wonder which Aide will take the fall. ..."

Mark Andrew Edwards, Logan Tiberius Edwards (2012-2021): "A red letter day. Time to see if Mike and Jay h ..."

Sharkman: "Red Sky at Night (actually titled "Red Skies"): ..."

Lysenko - Be happy that you're being killed by a good man instead of being left alone by a bad man. : "Or maybe a different GOT girl. I haven't watched ..."

DOJ: "We would investigate. However, all of our jail ce ..."

artemis: "@339 I think that there's a plot afoot in texas-- ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64