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August 30, 2007
Milwaukee Mystery
Defense attorney receives the severed head of a goat in a pink gift bag.
Presented with such a lovely gift, most seasoned attorneys would squeal with joy and suck the eyes out like escargot.**
And then dial up the Dark Lord on their cauldron of fire and thank Him for the bonus.
But this particular lawyer decided to issue a cryptic statement instead:
"August 27 was a full moon, and also was a lunar eclipse. It is also my understanding there haven't been any of our elected officials' sons or daughters charged with slashing tires or voter fraud. And since I haven't invented any new criminal defenses for any of my clients in the last few months, I assume the individual was trying to get my attention."
She defended one of the guys who was convicted of slashing Republican campaign workers' tires before the 2004 election. I don't know about you, but I get the impression she's wacky. And probably not very good in court.
**Helpful Hint: If you need to send a gift to a lawyer, you'll find that a bag of severed goat heads makes attorneys very, very happy. Try it and see. And don't forget to attach a personal note!
posted by Laura. at
11:10 AM
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