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July 28, 2007

Republican Operative: Hillary Cleavage Debate All Just a Tempest In B-Cup

Oh, dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

Hillary Clinton's handlers are so outraged - outraged! - at a newspaper story musing over her showing a little cleavage that they're urging equally miffed supporters to fight back by stuffing cash into her coffers. "Would you believe that The Washington Post wrote a 746-word article on Hillary's cleavage?" senior campaign adviser Ann Lewis said yesterday in the fund-raising e-mail.


A longtime Democratic operative who is no Clinton fan said it wasn't surprising that Team Hillary would try to generate a sympathy backlash - and then ask for cash to help ease the pain.

"She looks for every opportunity she can get to be the victim. It's her playbook," the party source said. "The question is whether Hillary-as-victim leaves her looking more like a martyr or a whiner."

A Republican operative mocked the controversy as "a tempest in a B-cup."

Great line, Dan Riehl says.

I thought so too when I used it a couple of times the past couple of years:

On all sides feminists were caterwauling as if this was an important and substantive argument, when it was all clearly just a tempest in a D-cup.

Damn you, unnamed Republican Political Operative.

It's all just a coincidence that Elizabeth Edwards rapped Hillary! as being a man in a pantsuit and then she displays the girls for the first time in approximately sixty-seven years and the media just happens to notice her rather indifferent cleavage with no tip-off from Team Hillary and then Hillary! uses this violation to raise money from donors thus getting the triple-benefit of having it noted for the record she is in fact a woman with both power andsexuality and also getting to play the victim card for people noticing that and on top of all that gettin' to collect good donor jack for suffering this oppressive oppression of oppressivnaciousness.

Meanwhile, Bill Clinton's happy to have his long-held theory confirmed, to wit, there are, in fact, "two of 'em."

John Edwards: Give me money because people say I have nice hair.

Hillary! Clinton: Give me money because people say I have breasts.

Somewhere out there Barack Obama is wondering if he needs to "black it up" in order to provoke someone into daring to observe that he's African-American.

I hear he's "seriously considering" attending the next debate wearing one of Flava Flav's enormous clock-necklaces and speaking exclusively in poetic aphorisms swiped from Nipsey Russel.

Skullduggery Afoot! Howard Wolfson was just caught "accidentally" leaving an empty bottle of Feminine Deodorant Spray clearly visible in the trash at Hillary!'s campaign headquarters. Then he was observed rubbing his hands together and shouting "Baby needs a new pair of Gulfstreams!" and laughing like a cartoon villain.

Edwards: "They" Are Trying To Silence Me By Talking About My Hair, Which I Myself Never Fail To Mention At Every Rally And In Every Internet Ad: He just can't stop talking about it. "They" make him do it.

Although I think a more "interesting theory," as Howard Dean would say, is found in this video at Hot Air.

Why should you contribute to John Edwards?

Because -- I shit you not -- if you don't, "these people" -- the right wing -- will "continue to control the media."

John, what color are the marmalade skies on your world, and do you find they clash with your the luscious highlights in your bangs?

digg this
posted by Ace at 08:13 PM

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