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9/11 Families Bravely Seeking The Truth! | Main | Jawa Report Is Back
June 30, 2006

Funny Stuff

Better Late Than Never

Selected favorites from Cool Facts About John Bolton's Moustache:

John Bolton's Moustache has had numerous "host beings" throughout history, including Doc Holliday, Jack the Ripper, and Rosie Perez. -Ace

The real reason John Bolton's Moustache had a hard time getting appointed to being the Ambassador to the UN was because of his prolific but little known career in adult movies under the name Bolt Johnson's Moustache.

Feng Shui or fengshui is the ancient Chinese practice of placement and arrangement of space to achieve harmony with JBM.
-Steve in hb

Spurwing Plover was a tenured professor of astrophysics at CalTech until he saw John Bolton's Moustache in his Mercedes' rearview mirror.
-Sue Dohnim

Indigenous Amazonian warriors rub their arrow tips on John Bolton's moustache before going hunting.

John Bolton's Mustache started off gray. It turned white after defeating the Balrog.

There are actually Nine Moustaches of Power, but John Bolton's is The One Moustache That Binds Them.

Homeland Security wants air marshalls to carry guns because giving them a piece of John Bolton's mustache is too crazy and dangerous.

John Bolton's moustache took the long jump gold medal in 1968 in Mexico City.
-Dave in Texas

According to noted journalist Larry Flynt, John Bolton forced his wife to perform embarrasing menages a trois with his moustache.

In Mexico, John Bolton's moustache is called "Pelo del Diablo" and a festival is held in its honor each year to keep its wrath from destroying villages and taking lives.

In June of 1939, Dick Cheneys Cock gave John Boltons moustache a Filthy Adolph-- nine months later, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked his way out of Boltons face.
-Amish Moustache ride

"Paradise Lost" isn't really about the fall of Satan from heaven. It's about the time John Bolton shaved his moustache.

As always, there will be no prizes.

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posted by Laura. at 10:47 AM

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