Disney Debuts What the Creator Agrees is the "Gayest Star Wars Show Ever" During Pride Month

During Pride Month, Disney?!

DURING PRIDE MONTH!?!!

I barely even want to cover this. Star Wars is dead and it's not coming back, and this is just more gay/feminist propaganda from Kaffeine Kennedy.

But I guess I have to at least mention this.

The hero of The Acolyte -- the Sith killer, I mean -- has two "moms." Two lesbian moms. And the show claims that one "created" her, while the other mom "carried" her.

This is a science fantasy show.

The "star" of the show then chimes in that this should appeal to "nerds" because, quote, "nerds are gay."

If you think the science is bad on having two moms who "created" a daughter, wait till you see the scene where the hero has to put out a fire on the exterior of a spaceship -- a fire that burns in the oxygen-free void of space.

The show informs us that Homophobia Is a Problem even in the far future of Star Wars -- yes, I know it's set in the distant past, Gay Nerds -- when one of the Sith hero's gay moms tells her that the galaxy oppresses people like us.

Reviews say that the ditzy star can't act.

So why was she chosen?

Well, previously she had appeared in a race-baiting, white-denigrating film called The Hate You Give, and said the point of that movie was "to make white people cry."

My sacred duty as a journalist requires me to note that at the London premiere, she did offer fans of Star Wars a living tribute to the twin suns of Tattooine, and I approve of that.

Episodes 1 and 2 were released. The word is that they are slow, boring, poorly written, and badly acted. Former Harvey Weinstein assistant and showrunner Leslye Headland -- there are some conspiracy theorists who think her history with Harvey Weinstein and her sudden rise as a showrunner may be related, somehow! -- cast her Nepot lesbian wife in not one but two roles, and reviewers say you can feel the force of nepotism in her terrible performance.

But the real problems come in episode three, which Allen Ng of Film Threat say destroys Star Wars forever. (Critics received screener copies of the first four episodes.)

Ng hasn't said exactly what causes the breaking, but there are rumors the show actually establishes that the Force is Female.

Gary from Nerdrotic says the show doesn't actually say "The Force is Female," but implies that the Force was created by the union of two lesbian women.

That Park Place:

This rumor comes from scooper WDW Pro, who detailed in a recent video upload, "According to a source that I have, Lorn, Kathleen Kennedy and Leslye Headland are going to do something in The Acolyte that is going to essentially end what remaining fans they have. And that is they are literally going to change the Force, the Force itself, into being literally female, gender female Force."

Later in the video, Pro detailed, "The source who has relayed to me some stuff, they believe this will be so bad that there's nothing left to do except reboot Star Wars. They think Kathleen Kennedy cannot continue or Star Wars cannot."

Film Threat writer Alan Ng has made similar comments. He posted on X, "The third episode of The Acolyte will finally kill Star Wars for the vast majority of Pre-Disney Star Wars Fans. Based on LucasFilm comments of late, they are OK with that."

They said the thing! They said the thing!

This changes the lore of Star Wars completely, of course. Never has it ever been suggested that the Force was "created" by anyone, much less two women bumping clams.

Gary from Nerdrotic points out that this is a major retcon that changes the Star Wars mythology as much as the "Timeless Children" episode of Doctor Who did. In that episode, woke showrunner Chris Chibnall told Doctor Who fans that the Timelords were born from a young black girl, and that young black girl was the Doctor's original and true form.

Apparently episode 3 also Makes Herstory by introducing trans pronouns, too.

The show also introduces the first live-action Wookiee Jedia, and shows why George Lucas had always resisted doing this: Because it's silly and looks stupid.

Why is the Wookiee wearing clothes? Chewbacca didn't, nor did any other Wookiee we saw.

But you wouldn't know he's a Jedi unless he was wearing Jedi Cosplay, so they put him in dumb pseudo-robes.

Oh, I thought maybe the wookiee is also a female, but no, this is one of the few male characters on the show.

There are no white men (spit) on the show, of course.

Oh, and speaking of Doctor Who: The ratings continue to fall. A single episode bucked the trend of ratings going down and down, and that episode had very little of the gay black "Doctor" played by gay black racist Ncuti Gatwa. Only a touch over two million people watched the last episode when it debuted.

In more Disney news: They shut down one of their most famous and most loved attractions, Splash Mountain, because apparently it was themed with characters from Song of the South, like Brer Rabbit and Brer Fox.

Therefore, the ride did a racism.

They revamped it by turning it into "Tiana's Bayou Adventure." Tiana is the black princess from The Princess and the Frog. So they wanted to get rid of Muh Racism, but once something is DEI, it must be DEI forever, so of course it had to be based on a movie featuring a black princess.

The ride is getting terrible reviews. It's had a problematic roll-out with breakdowns and even fires, but word is that it's just boring and that Disney once again cheaped out -- they took out all of the "offensive racist" animatronic animals from the Splash Mountain ride, but only replaced them with a handful of unimpressive Culturally Sensitive Animatronics.

Weirdly, even though the plot of the Princess and the Frog has Tiana being turned into a frog, the ride doesn't feature her in frog form. People are speculating they avoided that because they... didn't want to disrespect a Strong Black Female by reducing her to the state of froghood, even though that was the whole plot of the movie.

So Splash Mountain was problematic because it had Song of the South theming, and now this current ride is also problematic, because the movie promotes the harmful stereotype that black women sometimes transform into frogs.

They also didn't include voodoo theming in the ride, even though Tiana was turned into a frog by a voodoo spell. Reportedly they had PC reasons for avoiding voodoo -- wouldn't want to suggest that any real-world voodoo practitioners turn Strong Black Women into frogs. (They're also stripping out tiki torches and Polynesian theming from their Moana ride -- cultural appropriation!)

Honestly some voodoo theming might have been useful, given the reported lameness of the current ride. The ride is partly a "dark ride," where you're taken through dark indoor spaces, and that could have been a good place for ghosts and skeletons to scare you.

Instead of doing that, they replaced potential voodoo animatronics with... nothing.

Let me preempt any readers and say that I'm bored by this post.

Disney is dead, and it's no longer even worth saying.

Oh, and sorry for the long gap between posts-- I thought I had posted something at 3:15. Whoops!

posted by Disinformation Expert Ace at 04:00 PM

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