Saturday Overnight Open Thread (6/1/24)

“I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum.”

No nooky before the wedding night? And this happens. This should serve as a lesson.

WELL AISLE BE DAMNED Groom discovers his new bride is a man 12 days after their wedding when ‘wife’ kept putting off consummating marriage
The bride's parents revealed they were not aware that their son was in a relationship, let alone married

Perhaps if I lived in a city and didn't commute more than a block, I might buy a used Tesla. Oh FFS who am I kidding. I don't ever plan on an EV.

The launch of a new electric vehicle these days is invariably met with a chorus of "this car is too expensive"—and rightfully so. But for used EVs, it's quite another story, particularly used Teslas, thanks to a glut of former fleet and rental cars that are now ready for their second owner.

"Due to a variety of reasons, Tesla resale values have plummeted, making many Tesla models very affordable now. Plus, for some consumers, an additional $4,000 Federal tax credit on used EVs may apply, sweetening the deal even further. Buying a used Tesla can be a great deal for the savvy shopper, but there are significant things to look out for," says Ed Kim, president and chief analyst at AutoPacific.

Indeed, a quick search on the topic easily reveals some horror stories of ex-rental Teslas, so here are some things to consider if you're in search of a cheap Model 3 or Model Y.

For more than a year, Tesla has been engaged in an EV price war, mostly driven by its attempt to maintain sales in China. Heavily cutting the price of your new cars is a good way to devalue the used ones, and Hertz's decision to sell at least 20,000 of its Teslas was in part a response to the lower residual values.

Speaking of cars, The ONT Is Always Looking Out For You!^TM Is your car on the most wanted list?

CRIME Top 10 Most Stolen Vehicles in America
Top 10 Most Stolen Vehicles in America
This was originally posted on our Voronoi app. Download the app for free on iOS or Android and discover incredible data-driven charts from a variety of trusted sources.

Since the onset of the pandemic, the U.S. has experienced a surge in vehicle theft rates. In 2023, more than one million vehicles were reported stolen.

In this infographic, we list the most stolen vehicles in the U.S. last year, according to the National Insurance Crime Bureau.

If you have a lot of dough. Perhaps you will fit into one of these communities. As for the Fabulous and I, we remain here at Casa Misanthrope.

While we may recognize rich towns and cities like New York, Los Angeles, or Chicago, there are plenty of lesser-known rich towns in America. Ranked by their median household income, these are twelve of the richest towns in America that you may not have known about.

I would rather drive than fly Spirit.

SPIRIT AIRLINES-BRUTAL BRAWL AT CHECK-IN COUNTER
... 4 v 1 in Wild Video!!!

How did this guy think he wasn't going to win a Genius Award

Is That A Sex Doll Inside Your Body Bag?
Cops: Funeral home worker wanted to smuggle adult items

MAY 30--Investigators charge that a funeral home worker planned to use a body bag to smuggle a life-size sex doll out of the home of a man who died in his Nebraska residence, according to court records.

Ryan Smith, 42, was arrested in October for allegedly breaking into the Omaha apartment where the deceased man lived. At the time, Smith worked for Mid America First Call, which handles “removals, transportation, embalming, cremations, and ship-outs.”

As detailed in recent court filings, Smith and a coworker were dispatched to the Rock Creek Apartments to collect the decedent’s body. Inside the unit, a sheriff’s deputy noted, “Near the body on the bed was a very real life size version of an adult female.”

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by the Versatile One Gallon Milk Jug.

Notice: It's posted. No authorization granted by the Ace Media Empire.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 09:30 PM

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