Saturday Overnight Open Thread (8/19/23)

"This is a government job", the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that.

Agile little fucker.

Agile and beer drinkers.

A ‘Plague’ Of Beer-Drinking Raccoons Has Caused A ‘Catastrophe’ As They Raid Homes Across Germany

Germany's raccoon population has skyrocketed from 20 to several hundred thousand since they were first introduced around 1934.

Invasive raccoons are proving to be quite a problem for the people of Germany, as they have developed a liking for German beer and now spend their time breaking into people’s homes and even killing their beloved pets.

Do you think that Elliot Senseman and Timothy Treadwell get together for drinks once in a while? Just to shoot the bull?

What are the odds that there are back to back snake and raccoon stories on The ONT? Don't know. Don't care. No math allowed!

Large rattlesnake captured after interrupting pickleball game
A pickleball player said she's "still a little bit rattled" after a rattlesnake joined her group on the courts in Jefferson County.

The eyes say more than: Genius Award Winner.

AUGUST 18--After an evening out drinking, a Florida Woman allegedly served up a nightcap spiked with Raid bug killer to her boyfriend, the father of one of her children, police allege.

According to an arrest affidavit, Veronica Cline, 29, contacted the victim early this morning to say she “was coming home from drinking at the bar” and wanted him to “serve her an alcoholic beverage so they could drink together.”

Cline and the 24-year-old victim are parents to a one-year-old girl. Cline has at least one older child with a different man.

After Cline arrived at the residence in De Leon Springs, the victim told cops, he consumed about two drinks "when he began feeling sick.” After falling ill, the man recalled that Cline admitted adding “Raid Roach Spray to his last two beverages.”

Obviously a lower case moron. A Moron would have placed a camera as we all know, pics or it didn't happen.

'I left peanut butter for Bigfoot after hearing noises – two huge fingers took a scoop'
A bloke left a jar of peanut butter in the woods after hearing noises he thought might be Bigfoot - when he returned he found two 'big finger' marks pressed into the spread

Why go to college when you can go to Tech School and learn a trade? A trade that pays well and will always be needed.

Need A/C repairs? Tampa Bay companies warn you’ll have to wait in line
Tampa Bay A/C repair companies have been overbooked this summer. They’ve had to choose who needs service most and work days as long as 16 hours.

You gotta fight for your right to party binge.

Aug. 17 (UPI) -- Cannabis and hallucinogen use, as well as binge drinking, among U.S. adults ages 35-50 reached a historic high in 2022, the National Institutes of Health said Thursday.

"Past-year use of marijuana and hallucinogens by adults 35 to 50 years old continued a long-term upward trajectory to reach all-time highs in 2022, according to the Monitoring the Future (MTF) panel study, an annual survey of substance-use behaviors and attitudes of adults 19 to 60," the NIH said in a press release.

Obviously hindsight is 20/20......But, why would anyone think these items would be good investments?

Bored Ape Yacht Club NFT owners sue Sotheby's, celebs, and parent company as prices plummet
A case of blaming everyone but yourself?

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Awkward Messaging.

Notice: Posted with permission by the wonderful folks at the Ace Media Empire & AceCorp, LLC. Or some wannabes.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 09:41 PM

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