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Saturday Evening Movie Thread [moviegique]: "It Ain't Over" | Main | Daily Tech News 9 July 2023
July 08, 2023

Saturday Overnight Open Thread (7/8/23)

7 7 23 0nt.jpg

***

The Saturday Night Joke

———-

An elderly man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive sports car.

Enraged, the guy hops out and confronts the old man.

"Look what you did to my car" he yells.
"You're going to give me $10,000 right now or I'm going to beat you to a pulp!"

"Oh my" says the old man, "I don't have that kind of money.

Let me call my son, he trains dolphins and he will know what to do."

"Dolphins" the other driver huffs, while rolling his eyes.

The old man pulls out his phone, dials his son and just as his son answered, the irate man snatches the phone away from the old man.

"So, YOU'RE a dolphin trainer, huh? Well, Your old man here just rear-ended my car and I need 10 grand right now or I'm going to beat you AND your old man to a pulp."

"I'll be there in 10 minutes," says the voice calmly on the other end.

Exactly 10 minutes later a Jeep pulls up and a guy hops out and proceeds to pulverize the bully, leaving him in a heap on the side of the road.

When he finished, he walked over to his father and said….

"For the last time dad, I train Seals, Navy Seals.....

NOT dolphins!" (H/T MikeinJersey)


***


The joys of opposable thumbs.

I milked 30 pigs a day for their semen but it's left me with crippling injuries to BOTH my wrists - now I can't work and I want compensation
Doing a job she loved left woman with few job options
She did serious damage to wrists by semen extraction

A woman whose job it was to 'milk' pigs for their semen says a crippling wrist injury she suffered on the job has left her unable to work.

Maxine, 31, had a job she loved in animal welfare which paid well, but unfortunately it caused long-term injuries.

She started her job collecting pig semen for breeding top quality pork at the age of 18, but by 21 it had caused serious injuries in both her wrists.

Blind pig jokes?


***


Do you take (Insert first name here) Butt to be your lawful husband? Should have been a clue.

Over time, some traditions have died out, but one that lives on for many is a father's surname being passed down to his children. One wife is totally fine with the tradition itself, but she has a very big problem with her husband's last name, so big that she can't fathom giving it to her kids. That's because his last name is Butt.

She explained her quandary on Reddit, writing, "My husband's last name is Butt. Can someone please help me illuminate to him why this last name is less than ideal? I totally get we can't shield kids from everything and I understand the whole family ties thing but c'mon. Am I being unreasonable by suggesting our future kid either take my name, a hybrid, or a new one altogether?"

It might seem like a joke, but Butt is indeed a last name that, according to Ancestry.com, comes from the Old English "butta," or "something or someone short and stumpy." It also describes a person who lived near a mound, like a butte.


***

When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. When life hands you the Midnight Sun, crash cars.

But in Sutton, Alaska, there’s an Independence Day tradition that doesn’t rely on darkness: The Glacier View Fourth of July Car Huck.

In Alaska, this time of year, there’s barely any darkness at nighttime at all. This morning, sunrise in Anchorage was at 4:33 AM and sunset is at 11:35 PM. The time in between if followed by lengthy periods of twilight where it barely gets dark.

This is a problem for Alaskans who want to enjoy fireworks like the lower 48. Shooting off fireworks is best at night.

Without any real semblance of nighttime, Alaskans have adapted to participating in the annual Glacier View ‘Car Huck’ where cars are launched off a mountain and explode down below. The Alaska car launch or ‘Car Huck’ is perhaps one of the greatest traditions in America and those of us in the lower 48 might never get to see it in person.


***


A great interview of a young man who has a sense of humor. (H/T Robert)

***


The joys of phones, for the foreseeable future the internet is forever.

Woman lashes out at ‘Mexican party in the pool’, freaks out when she realizes she’s being recorded


***


The ONT Musical Interlude & Decompression Emporium


&&&


Born on this day: July 8, 1944 - Jaimoe Johanson
Jaimoe Johanson, American drummer and percussionist, and one of the founding members of The Allman Brothers Band who released the classic album Eat a Peach in 1972 and had the 1973 US No.12 single 'Ramblin Man'. via thisdayinmusic.com

&&&



***

A Genius? A Feel Good Story? You be the judge. I opine that it is a great prank!(H/T Lonesome Ed)

A shark fin that sparked panic on a British beach was a fake planted by a prankster.

The anonymous practical joker went to great lengths to carve the shape of the distinctive dorsal fin out of hardened insulation foam and paint it dark grey.

They then fixed it to a wooden cross with a weight on the bottom that kept the fin afloat.

It was placed in the sea about 300 metres from the coast of Torquay, Devon.


***


The failure to plan on your part can earn you a Genius Award.

Cruise passengers clap and jeer at 'entitled' woman turning up at ship 45 minutes late
Cruisers know that if you don't make boarding after a stop you'll be left behind on the dock. But, cruise passengers jeered one lass who casually strolled back to the ship


***


Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Movie Pitch.


Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire and AceCorp, LLC. ONT Tips, jokes, loose change, drink tokens and burner phones to petmorons at gmail dot com. Complaints? Of course to the complaint department.

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