Saturday Overnight Open Thread (2/12/22)

1 – Never be arrogant.
2 – Don’t waste ammunition.
3 – Whiskey makes you think you’re smarter than you are.
4 – Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 – Don’t mess with old women; they didn’t get old by being stupid.(H/T mindful webworker)

The ONT Is Always Looking Out For You.^TM

This year’s Big Game between the Los Angeles Rams and the Cincinnati Bengals here in LA’s new stadium has football fans super excited across the City of Angels and beyond. Let’s be honest, though, this unofficial American holiday is as much about the food as it is about football. Planning a healthy menu for the Big Game is easier than you may expect and will make your home team fans go wild.

Why be mindful about food and drink when the Big Game happens just one day out of the year? Overindulgence on Sunday leads to as many as one in four employees calling in sick on Monday. Heartburn and blood sugar problems are just a few of the unpleasant side effects that can occur when eating in excess and deviating from your usual meal plan.

Here are some healthy Game Day menu ideas to fuel your football-watching:

This looks like fun both as a spectator and participant.

It seems like some people have all the luck. Other people are born with a Lucky Rabbit's Foot up their ass.

THIS is the shocking moment a woman is run over twice after a driver apparently mistook her for a snowdrift.

The 77-year-old pedestrian miraculously survived without a scratch after the motorist ran her over while reversing from a parking spot.

Musicians are certainly some thin skinned individuals. Contracts obviously don't mean anything. I'll take my microphone and go home.

Nope. No inflation in the pre-owned vehicle market.

InIn December 2014, I bought a Honda Fit right off the lot. It had 23 miles, and I paid $20,814.80, including accessories and an extended warranty. This December, a buzzy startup called Carvana drove away with my car, cutting me a check for $20,905 — leaving me with a profit of $90.20.

Not only that, but Carvana’s offer was $5,000 higher than Vroom, $6,000 higher than TrueCar, and $7,500 higher than CarMax. Carvana’s offer changed day by day, too: the final one I accepted was $1,338 higher than its lowest quote.

I knew I had everything going for me — low mileage, no accidents, and desirable trim at a time when car prices are going through the roof on a model that Honda discontinued. And yet, it sounded ludicrous. Used cars almost never sell for more than their original price, and the company knew next to nothing about me. Yet, Carvana’s algorithm had agreed to pay $20K for my car sight-unseen, even bring a pre-printed check to my door, before any inspection took place. The online quote arrived so fast, I knew a human couldn’t have been involved.

No mention of Sous Vide.

1950s Food Porn: The Good Housekeeping’s Cookery Book
The Good Housekeeping's Cookery Book was a national best-seller, the go-to book for the "housewife" who wanted to make housekeeping "a pleasure rather than a burden."

Do you remember Fingos? Not quite as classy as Kaboom.

Fingos
A classic business failure. In the early 1990s, the marketing team at General Mills came up with the idea of a cereal that could be eaten without milk any time of day. Despite spending millions to promote it, hardly anyone bought the stuff.

From Wikipedia:

Teenage Wasteland

I can smell the potpourri now. The Glade freshener. The rosewater. Gram had a bitchin’ keyboard in the living room. I can hear the snap of the switches. Feel the sproing of the nasty plastic keys. Only one thing is out of place in this video. Gram would never let you put a drink on top of her organ without a coaster under it. Shame on you.

Geography Lesson.

FROM BUTT HOLE ROAD TO CLIMAX, PA: THE HORNY ART OF VULGAR GEOGRAPHY
The age-old practice of ‘vulgar geography’ involves giving incredibly sexual names to otherwise uneventful places. But when it comes to naming mountains and streams, how much can you really get away with?

For decades, English-speaking tourists have made pilgrimages from around the world to visit a tiny, Austrian village once known as Fucking. No doubt chuckling the entire time, pranksters have stolen the town’s official road sign on countless occasions (at one point it had to be chained to the ground), whereas local residents have long complained about having to shrug off constant, shitty jokes made by visitors. In late 2020, frustrated citizens rallied together to campaign for an official name change. They succeeded, and soon afterwards, the local mayor announced that Fucking would now be known as Fugging, although the nearby Oberfucking and Unterfucking still exist in Austria.

If the Fabulous Mrs. Mis. Hum. is lurking tonight. Don't click this link. Don't do it!

Reason #242 not to live in Madison, WI. This guy ought to be receiving a medal instead of a felony charge.

Wisconsin man is facing a felony charge after using his truck to T-bone a vehicle carrying two people who had just stolen a snow blower from his family’s garage, police report.

According to cops, Corey Sanderson, 29, intentionally plowed into the driver’s side of the getaway car as it turned onto a street a few blocks from his Madison residence.

The vehicle’s occupants, a man and a woman, suffered “serious, but non-life threatening injuries” and were transported late Monday night to a local hospital, investigators say.

Sanderson (seen at right) told Madison Police Department officers that he “saw two people steal a snow blower from his garage and began following them in his truck.” He reportedly admitted intentionally t-boning the other vehicle, prompting cops to arrest him on a felony reckless endangerment charge.

Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by Heating and Cooling Equipment.

Notice: Posted with permission by the Ace Media Empire, AceCorp, LLC and those faceless suits on the Executive Floor.

posted by Misanthropic Humanitarian at 09:31 PM

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