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Get Woke, Go Broke: Buzzfeed Edition | Main | The Morning Report - 5/15/20
May 14, 2020

Ramblin' Man ONT

So, tonight's ONT will be shorter than usual, because I decided to hit the road. I'm headin' out, goin' Galt, shaking the dust from this one horse town from my feet. I've got a long way to go and a short time to get there, I'm shuffling off to Buffalo, I'm heading out to the highway.

Mostly I'm just sick to death of being cooped up at home, and so I'm jumping at the chance to go to Georgia and shoot guns. I'm taking the RV, so what's the difference? I'm still staying at home, it's just a home with wheels that's heading for a place where I can actually go out and eat a meal. Basically, I just need a break from feeling like this:


Other Ways To Go Crazy

Man dives into Bass Pro fish tank in Fort Myers

Looks like it may be one of those “Bass Pro challenge” type thing. Might not be, I confess I've looked at the big tank in a BPS before and thought “Y'know, I could swim in that...”

When The Americans Began To Hate

A Time to Hate

Who here likes Kipling? (“I dunno, I've never kippled”-some wag in the back)

The Beginnings.jpg

Yeah. That.

Related: Governor Inslee lays out statewide contact tracing plan for COVID-19

Not just no, but hell no! And what if you don't comply?

Therefore, those individuals that refuse to cooperate with contact tracers and/or refuse testing, those individuals will not be allowed to leave their homes to purchase basic necessities such as groceries and/or prescriptions. Those persons will need to make arrangements through friends, family, or a state provided “family support personnel.”

In other words, comply, peasant, or we'll lock you in your home and starve you to death. He's only one welded-shut door away from going full CCP.

How To Obscure The Implications Of What You're Saying With A Word Salad

Early humans in China innovated technology to adapt to climate change 1-million years ago

At 1.1 million years ago the early human inhabitants of the Nihewan Basin lived under a changeable and unstable environment, experiencing strengthened aridification. As climatic variability produced ecological changes, including landscape alterations and mammalian extinctions, novel technological innovations likely provided benefits to early hominin populations in the Nihewan Basin.

Translation: Climate is always changing, and humans adapt. No indication what these proto-humans did with their SUVs to stop the climate change. Probably sacrificed a virgin and prayed to the old gods. Speaking of....

And You Thought Peter Griffin And The Chicken Was Fake

Wise Words

Tonight's ONT brought to you by the worst job at the club:

fat stripper.jpg

Sorry about the light commentary and Twitter heavy content tonight, but I've got to get on the road.

digg this
posted by WeirdDave at 10:00 PM

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