Did Robert Mueller Claim That If Not for the OLC Guidance Against Indicting a President, He Would Have Found That Trump Committed the Crime of Obstruction? | Main | The Morning Report - 5/31/19
May 30, 2019

I Think That I Shall Never See, A Poem As Pretty As The ONT

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Anyone remember this memorable caption mistake?


cookies1.jpg


Tiny Baby Human!


Girl believed to be tiniest newborn weighed as much as apple

8.6 oz. Squeeee! (That was totally a manly squee)

Calling a Spade a Spade

Or in this case, a fuckin' shovel.

Fresno Grizzlies have to apologize for video that correctly associates AOC with Castro

I don't see what the problem is. She believes the same thing they do.


Game of Thrones

I didn't watch the show, but apparently Tyrion started to tell a joke that he never finished, and lots of people are wondering what the joke was. Well, here's the whole thing:

Tyrion walked into a brothel with a honeycomb and a jackass.
The madam says “How can I help you?”
Tyrion says “I for wish a woman to lay with, for mine has left me”
The madam says “Why did she leave? And what's with the honeycomb and the jackass?”
Tyrion replies “My woman found a genie in a bottle, and he granted her three wishes. She wished for a house fit for a queen, and the genie gave her this damn honeycomb. Her second wish was that she might have the finest ass in the land, so he gave her this damn donkey.”
“And what of the Third wish?”
“Well, she wished for my cock to hang down past my knees”
“That doesn't seem so bad”
“Not so bad, eh? I used to be six foot five!”

Predictions

Predictions.jpg

We Are All Groot

Groot In Hot Water After Recent 'I Am Groot' Comments

Me No Think So

Man Gets Full Back tattoo of Jar Jar; Has Sex Multiple Times


Jajar.jpg

I gotta admit, subject matter aside, it is a pretty damn impressive tattoo. The artist has skill.

Roy Moore

Roy Moore is making noises about running for Senate in Alabama. Trump smacked him down pretty hard, Ace covered it yesterday. Now, personally, I have no particular love (or hate) for Moore, but I do have a question. I remember the last time he ran, suddenly he was the subject of all kinds of accusations, the GOPe ran away from him at warp speed and Jones won. What I never saw, either during that election or after, was any confirmation that the accusations were true. Did I miss that? Were the accusations ever substantiated? Because that seems like kind of an important detail, no matter who the person involved is.

Truth in Advertising

Longtime Mercedes Benz CEO Dieter Zetsche retired last week, and the good folks at BMW took the time to put together a brief video salute to their rival:


Tonight's ONT brought to you by old habits:

hungry.jpg

digg this
posted by WeirdDave at 10:00 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
SH (Non-Expert Elite): "There are so many retirees now (with the last of t ..."

jim (in Kalifornia): "326 Here's a fun challenge: Can you think of any ..."

ID Gent: "Regarding the "Lower Your Expectations" billboard. ..."

[/i][/b]Christopher R Taylor[/i][/s][/b]: "[i]Social Security was and is sold as something ev ..."

Minnfidel: "Baldwin from a 2017 Tweet after an officer shot a ..."

Blago: "The analysis I've read is the average person gets ..."

Emmie: "I gotta admit that I don't understand how money th ..."

Lizzy[/i]: "Maybe they need to used a series of wires tied to ..."

We're Serving Up gp, Hot And Fresh: ""We will default in one of several ways - delibera ..."

spindrift: "Fuck Joe Biden. ..."

rickb223 [/s][/b][/i][/u]: "People keep talking as if we have another 20, 30, ..."

Warai-otoko: "People keep talking as if we have another 20, 30, ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64