« ISIS "Finance Minister" and Supposed Number Two Leader Killed by Special Forces in Raid in Syria | Main | Ted Cruz: National Enquirer "Smear" Just "Garbage" and "Lies" From "Trump's Henchmen" »
March 25, 2016

Trump Aide Now Supposedly Fulfills Threat to "Spill the Beans" on Ted Cruz's Wife

This is nonsense. Of course Donald Trump meant something sleazy and personal, as this honorless, stinking pile of wet shit always means.

But this scumbag psychopath realized he's gone too far, and now sends out his paid minion to claim "Oh we were just talking about well-known biographical entries that have long been part of the public record."

"Spilling the beans is quite simple when it comes to Heidi Cruz," Pierson said in an interview with MSNBC's Steve Kornacki. "She is a Bush operative, she worked for the architect of NAFTA, which has killed millions of jobs in this country, she was a member on the Council on Foreign Relations who in Sen. Cruz's own words called a nest of snakes that seeks to undermine national sovereignty and she's been working for Goldman Sachs, the same global bank that Ted Cruz left off of his financial disclosure," Pierson said.

"Her entire career has been spent working against everything Ted Cruz says that he stands for," she added.

Yeah, I'm sure the well-read, very informed, policy-oriented wonk Trump was talking about that.

As opposed to the deeply sleazy personal stuff, like the stuff about Hedi Cruz wandering in a confused state one day.

Yeah. The wonky stuff seems more like Trump's style.

Of course this is dishonest cover to distance Trump from the Trumpish National Enquirer story claiming there are "claims" about Ted Cruz.

I'm old enough, and realistic enough, to imagine there is a fair amount of truth here. I don't really have any illusions about people when it comes to sexual matters.

However, I should also point out the National Enquirer does not claim Ted Cruz has had an affair; it claims that there are claims. It does not report they've confirmed he's had affairs; it says, instead, it can report there are "reports."

Read it for yourself: They're alleging there are allegations:

And the new issue of The National ENQUIRER -- on newsstands now -- reveals how the reports say the staunch Republican is hiding FIVE different mistresses!

"Private detectives are digging into at least five affairs Ted Cruz supposedly had," claimed a Washington insider.

"The leaked details are an attempt to destroy what's left of his White House campaign!"

Well that sure sounds buttoned-up and solidly sourced to me.

People are claiming the National Enquirer wouldn't publish this unless they had proof. But what exactly are they alleging? They are alleging there are allegations, and truth is a perfect defense in a defamation suit.

And there are allegations. (In fact, a while ago, I heard one. But then again, I've heard everything about a lot of people.)

Thus, they are 100% truthful in alleging there are allegations. They will win a defamation case about their report that there are reports, that there are claims there are claims.

For those who say the National Enquirer is always right -- well, it was right about John Edwards and Tiger Woods.

Is it always right, though?

According to this National Enquirer bombshell, Hillary Clinton will never be president, because she has brain cancer, and she'll be dead in six months!

Failing health and a deadly thirst for power are driving Hillary Clinton to an early grave, The National ENQUIRER has learned in a bombshell investigation.

The desperate and deteriorating 67-year-old won't make it to the White House -- because she'll be dead in six months, sources told The ENQUIRER.

Amazingly, her ultra-competitive husband is the one pressuring her to stay on the campaign trail despite her decline!

"Cruel Bill would rather see her drop than miss a single vote," a source told The ENQUIRER. "Hillary shouldn't be on the campaign trail -- she should be home making out her will!"

Shocking details from a new book and Hillary's "secret medical file" show the presidential candidate is a ticking time bomb whose life is about to expire.

But Hillary's camp -- desperate to win the Democratic nomination -- is engaging in a massive cover-up about her health.


Her "secret medical file" shows that during her hospitalization three years ago in New York, doctors believed she had brain cancer.

That article was published in October 7, 2015.

Six months from October 7, 2015, was March 7, 2016.

You remember the news, right? About Hillary Clinton dying two weeks ago?

It was a big deal, made the cable channels. Surprised you missed it.

Update: I counted wrong. It's been five and a half months. So the Hillary Brain Cancer Clock still has a couple of weeks left on it.

By the way, that's from Ed Klein's book about the Clintons. If you ever wonder "Gee why isn't Ace quoting this Ed Klein BOMBSHELL that's being reported in the tabloids and NY Post," well, it's crap like this that's the reason why.

Ed Klein's BOMBSHELLS seem to, um, bomb an awful lot.

Now of course one has to wonder -- from where did this story come? What kind of scumbag operates at this exceedingly low, enough-to-make-you-physically-disgusted level at all times?

I can't think of anyone.

In completely unrelated news, it can now be claimed that there are claims that the National Enquirer has some kind of relationship and/or rooting interest in one candidate in this race.

epublican presidential frontrunner Donald Trump has won the endorsements and fandom of former Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, Sarah Palin, former heavyweight boxer and convicted rapist Mike Tyson, Ann Coulter, leading conspiracy obsessive Alex Jones, a "pro-rape" blogger, and a porn star called Dick Chibbles.

More recently, Trump has earned the endorsement of the National Enquirer, one of America’s most ubiquitous supermarket tabloids on celebrity gossip and scandal.

"TRUMP MUST BE PREZ!" the endorsement reads on the cover of this week’s issue (which you can pick up for an easy $4.99). "INSIDE: VOTE FOR HIS VICE PRESIDENT!"

Eh, I guess there probably is truth here. And I certainly therefore could never vote for Cruz.

I would therefore have to turn to the One Man who lives his life as the very embodiment of marital faithfulness, moral virtue, and sexual restraint -- Donald J. Trump, the Paragon of Fifth Avenue.

You know, the guy who called Jeffrey Epstein a "terrific guy" and spoke approvingly of Epstein surrounding himself with "beautiful women," some of whom were "on the younger side."

Yes, it is that remorseless stinking pile of narcissistic rich bitch shit that I'll now be supporting.

No, but seriously: I will vote for Hillary before I support this dangerous, venomous scumbag.

digg this
posted by Ace at 12:19 PM

| Access Comments

Recent Comments
Tonypete: "Evening everyone. ..."

Cicero (@cicero43): "I got peanut brittle. ..."

Quint: "here was a time when it was fashionable for very ..."

Kindltot: "[i]Whut?How did you Humans ever become the top of ..."

Zettai: "⚉ {{{ZETTAI}}} ⚉ ..."

Hadrian the Seventh: " I hear the argument at SCOTUS was heated. At on ..."

Sandy: "Arf! ..."

The Barrel: "ONT ..."

Lurking Cheshirecat: "Meow ..."

Bete: "The ONT is here. ..."

All Hail Eris, Iron Fist in Velvet Glove in Iron Gauntlet Clutching an Iron Mace : "It's a Weird Dave joint! ..."

WhyBanned: "755 rumor Marlborough is Camel with a filter W ..."

Recent Entries

Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64