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March 24, 2011

Top Ten Rejected Obama Euphemisms For Illegal War of Choice In Oil-Rich Muslim Country

10. Multilateral Limited-Theater Kineticized Response Protocol

9. It's not a war, the president just has a bad case of Kaboomey-Pants

8. Extreme Diplomacy

7. Peace Strikes

6. Full-Spectrum Combined-Arms Enhanced Humanitarian Relief Effort

5. A strongly-worded communique spraypainted on the side of a clusterbomb

4. "The Greatest Game of Golf Ever Played"

3. It's like giving your kid a "time out" except instead of taking away his TV privileges you bomb his presidential compound

2. Really just a kind of sanctions, but "dark, edgy" sanctions with "attitude" and a "troubled, mysterious past"

And the number one rejected euphemism for war...

1. Andrea Mitchell's Dirty Snootch


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