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December 11, 2009

Breaking: Tiger Woods: "I am suspending my career in competitive sports indefinitely, so that I can spend more time with my hookers."


No, he didn't say hookers. And I don't really think he was with hookers. But hookers is a damn funny word and it's hard to pass up the opportunity.

(Someone observed that any word with a "k" sound in its middle is somehow inherently funny: Pickles. Monkeys. Kookoo. Funky. Knockers. Hookers. "Pookie."

Is it really that simple? There does seem to be something to that.)

But he is suspending his golf career "indefinitely." Which means "until my sponsors and corporate-crisis people tell me it's okay to play again."

Here's his full statement, once again thanks to Red Eye's Andy Levy.


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posted by Ace at 07:00 PM

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