Israel Prepares Ground War for Gaza | Main | Hamas: We Will Kidnap Israeli Soldiers If a Ground War Begins
January 02, 2009

Man Devises Three Part Strategy for Deterring Burglars: 1, Bulk Up With Muscle, 2, Dress Up Like Thunder God Thor, and 3, Act Like a Frigging Lunatic

As soon as he saw me, his eyes went wide with fear, this home-owner says.

Well. Yeah. He the burglar didn't expect he'd be the second-most psychotic person in that house. I'm pretty sure he was counting on top honors.

Six-foot-tall fitness fanatic Torvald Alexander, 38, was wearing a full God of Thunder outfit - complete with flying red cape and tinfoil silver-winged helmet - when he spotted the raider in his front room rifling through a desk.

Mr Alexander, who runs building firm Alexander & Summers in Edinburgh, Scotland, said the burglar threw himself out of a first-floor window of his 350,000 home in the Inverleith area of the city when he opened the door and confronted him.

The man landed on a roof outside the window, which broke his fall, enabling him to escape.

Mr Alexander said: 'As soon as he saw me, his eyes went wide with terror.

'He looked like he had had a few drinks and decided to do a late night break-in, but he hadn't counted on the God of Thunder living here.

'We were both startled but then the instant reaction was that I ran at him and he just jumped straight out of the window.

'I think I would be quite scared if someone looking almost like a gladiator ran at them.

I don't feel like working out and I don't look good in red, so maybe my strategy will just be to soil myself and start singing gibberish songs about space-herpes.

That should scare someone too.

I will send you to JWF for the picture, which is quite worth the click.



digg this
posted by Ace at 05:35 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
grammie winger - Cubs are gonna suck again: "Nightmare stuff. ..."

Dave the Octopus: "Bob Berdella was a gay serial killer who killed th ..."

Tami[/i][/b][/s][/u]: " It's generally not a good idea to shove stuff up ..."

Boulder terlit hobo: "[i]"senescent" is also a new word courtesy of Mist ..."

pookysgirl says GO DODGERS GO!: "I'd forgotten how much of a drawl Timmy has. Still ..."

garrett: ">>Bob Berdella was a gay serial killer who killed ..."

publius, the Persistent Poperin Pear: " Hmmphh, you learn something every day. "Teled ..."

grammie winger - Cubs are gonna suck again: "Posted by: Steve and Cold Bear at October 20, 2017 ..."

gNewt: "Bright, fresh, illuminating, WD at ONT. ..."

A Penguin: "There is actual acreage going to waste in Antarcti ..."

kallisto: ""senescent" is also a new word courtesy of Mister ..."

grammie winger - Cubs are gonna suck again: "Ha! Wish I could see it. Was it pretty! ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64