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October 31, 2008

Halloween Eve Overnight Thread (genghis)

I got nuthin.’ Well, except this cookbook I saw advertised in the margin of the blog (sondrak.com) Ace linked to in the “Brunner…” post below: Eat What You Want and Die Like a Man: The World's Unhealthiest Cookbook.

Yes. I believe I’ve found my personal mantra in life. From one of the reviews on Amazon:

”The decadent recipes are only part of the story of this book, though. The patter is what get's to me. Steve Graham often "channels" the voices of celebrities, movie stars, other authors, and even Bill O'Reilly. And he's good at it. He makes it sound like they're actually in the kitchen with you --- helping you cook ---and it makes the cooking fun.

Here's a snippet of "Christopher Walken" dropping in on Steve and helping him make Bosco(tm), or something.

"... Soon we're in Steve's living room, and I'm sipping my Campari--which is a little strong, but I say nothing, because Christopher Walken is a gracious guest--while a couple of my boys hold Steve's head under the water of his fifty-gallon fish tank.

Steve has tetras. Tetras and those other little--what do you call them?--dwarf cichlids. Little pansy fish that don't even fight. I realize it is a matter of taste, but me, I always went for the heavy artillery. Oscars. Piranha. Small sharks. Some people feed their carnivorous fish goldfish. I fed mine Yorkies.

I cannot abide a small defiant dog that looks like a Slinky..."

"...When the time is right, I have my boys pull his head out and sit him on the sofa and get him a towel and some Bosco. He has Bosco in his cupboard. I respect that. That bought him some points. I'm a Bosco man myself. Some guys like Ovaltine. That's okay, I guess. I shot a guy in the face for drinking Ovaltine. Once. But I was young. Full of hormones. Exuberant. I would never do that now. Today I would be satisfied with slamming his head on the counter a couple times..."


”We can eatz ur soulz?”

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posted by xgenghisx at 01:22 AM

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