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October 17, 2008

Uhnnnhh.... NNnnnyaahhhh....

Arthur nnnyyuhh gughhhhh Death Ray Instruction Manual, ugghhhh....

A recently published Air Force Instruction paper has established a safety program for Directed Energy Weapons (DEWs), also affectionately known as death rays.


Here's what's obviously the best paragraph.

DEW systems create unique hazards that are different from conventional and nuclear weapons," the paper informs. "Potential DEW systems covered by this instruction include, but are not limited to, high-energy lasers, weaponized microwave and millimeter wave beams, explosive-driven electromagnetic pulse devices, acoustic weapons, laser induced plasma channel systems, non-lethal directed energy devices, and atomic-scale and subatomic particle beam weapons.


Ahhh. Luscious.

Let's look at that in more detail.

DEW systems create unique hazards that are different from conventional and nuclear weapons


That's the point!

DEW systems covered by this instruction include, but are not limited to, ...


There's MORE coming!

The mighty list.

high-energy lasers
YES.

weaponized microwave and millimeter wave beams,
YES!!

explosive-driven electromagnetic pulse devices,
Oh BABY - PULSE ON ME!

acoustic weapons,
SCREECH

laser induced plasma channel systems,
I don't even know what this is but it makes me hard.

non-lethal directed energy devices
Set boner for stun.

atomic-scale and subatomic particle beam weapons.
You had me at atomic!


Is every mad scientist in the world working for the US defense department?

Unnnnhhhh.... uugghghhhh....


Unnh. Unnh.

Strike. Flare. Sizzle. Puff.

Oh that was nice.


digg this
posted by Ace at 01:57 AM

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