ę John Bolton on Threats of Disruption by Stop the War Coalition: "I would be delighted to go to Bristol and face the fruitcakes down" | Main | Knock Wood Before Reading This Post Ľ
May 30, 2008

Bob Dole Sends a Friendly Email to Scott McClellan

"Miserable creatures:"

"There are miserable creatures like you in every administration who donít have the guts to speak up or quit if there are disagreements with the boss or colleagues," Dole wrote in a message sent yesterday morning. "No, your type soaks up the benefits of power, revels in the limelight for years, then quits, and spurred on by greed, cashes in with a scathing critique."

...

"In my nearly 36 years of public service I've known of a few like you," Dole writes, recounting his years representing Kansas in the House and Senate. "No doubt you will 'clean up' as the liberal anti-Bush press will promote your belated concerns with wild enthusiasm. When the money starts rolling in you should donate it to a worthy cause, something like, 'Biting The Hand That Fed Me.' Another thought is to weasel your way back into the White House if a Democrat is elected. That would provide a good set up for a second book deal in a few years"

Dole assures McClellan that he won't read the book -- "because if all these awful things were happening, and perhaps some may have been, you should have spoken up publicly like a man, or quit your cushy, high profile job"

...

He signs the email simply: "BOB DOLE"

Dole explains the reasons for the email here, and they are, sadly, personal. He keeps using the word "turncoat" which really undermines his point, because it suggests (without intending that suggestion) that Scott McClellan's crime is telling true tales out of school. Where in fact Dole's real beef is that he's lying.

Not that he's disloyal, but dishonest.

McClellan's claims are self-refuting. His offers up his integrity to establish his claims are true -- but if he in fact had the integrity he claims as his offer of proof, he would have resigned not terribly long into his tenure. So he comes to us now, inadvertently confessing his own lack of integrity or honor, and asks us to believe him.

McClellan didn't need to write a book indicting the Bush Administration. His own three year post as WH spokesman -- an ineffectual, bumbling fool and milquetoast who even managed to make the WH press corps look omnicompetent by comparison -- is a much greater indictment.

He was supposed to project authority and competence. Instead he projected weakness, confusion, and ineptitude. Having been stupidly promoted far above his abilities and exposed as the feckless incompetent that he is, his job prospects for serving as the spokesman for anything loftier than a regional tire distributor are pretty dim. This is his last, best chance to make serious coin.

And to answer Allah's question: Yes, the fact that he was paid a smallish advance ($100,000) means that of course he can only make more money than that by selling a hell of a lot more books than a $100,000 advance would typically predict.

Not only that, but a bigger advance means a bigger promotional budget in order to make sure a book at least makes back most of its advance. A small advance means less promotion. And that means little Scottie McClellan has to do most of the promotion himself -- by making the juiciest possible claims that libel law will permit.

Dick Morris had an interesting point -- there's nothing really in this book. Facts would be game-changing, politically. But McClellan has precious few to offer. From the excerpts, he seems to offer only his own interpretations of facts already on the record, and, given his general stupidity, seem less authoritative than the interpretations and critiques offered up by your average small-market newspaper columnist. He also offers some rather implausible speculations -- Rove and Scooter Libby almost never talked (huh?), so when they did talk, it must have been about Plame -- which is the sort of noodling guesswork lowly bloggers offer up on a daily basis.

So, what do we have? We have a borderline retard not included in any significant policymaking meetings, basically given a set of talking points every day and told "Go read these to the press; if you have trouble with a longer word, try sounding it out," who now offers his take on matters he knew very little about.

But because his take is anti-Bush, he's suddenly elevated to the status of Sage, and, apparently, credited with the psionic power of telepathic scanning of the thoughts of Karl Rove.


digg this
posted by Ace at 04:31 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Barack Hussein Obama: "[i]A simple "Thank you" isn't enough is it?[/i] ..."

Iron Mike Golf: "[i]22 Was at an event yesterday and an ex-Ranger w ..."

logprof cranking up Henry's Dress: "Style guide: It's Scooby-doo, not Scooby-do. ..."

redc1c4 [/b] [/i] [/s] [/u]: "FYI: i blew up the pic, and the gravestone in fron ..."

Farmer Bob: "49- Dad was stationed at Albany til 73. We lived i ..."

weirdflunky: "If you ever find yourself in Madison, Ga you shoul ..."

ALH: "(BOO) ..."

mr_jack: "One-hit authors: I have one for you. My wife an ..."

Professor Chaos aka Gumdrop Gorilla: "I remember a Scooby-do episode that dealt with tre ..."

Iblis: "[i]282 To me, and I stand to be corrected, the odd ..."

Ripley: "Gen. Kellys remarks will be be lost on hard left&n ..."

ALH: "135 Sometimes it's not. 8) ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64