« World's Stupidest Criminals, All-Time Title Holders | Main | Michelle Obama: "It makes you feel justified in your own ignorance. That's America."
Contrast With Wright: Italians Have "Garlic Noses" »
March 26, 2008

Ace Of Spades Lifestyle…Wild Kingdom Edition

Pandas aren’t just adorable money making machines for zoos, they are also apparently the greatest wildlife consumers of porn and live sex shows!

Treating China's notoriously undersexed national icon to “panda porn” - or videos of other pandas having sex - is believed to have had some success. Now China has devised a new tactic to help the black-and-white animals to have more babies.

The answer is “sexercise”. Keepers are putting their charges at the Chengdu Panda Breeding and Research Centre in southwestern Sichuan province through a rigorous programme with the aim of improving their mating skills.

…With any luck, they may begin to show an interest in sex, often seen as symptoms of anxiety. The two are then placed in the same pen in the hope that they will have sex.

Pandas with a bit more experience may also be called in to help their more innocent companions. One official said: “We arrange lovemaking between two excellent pandas in front of inexperienced pandas which have never had sex. It does work.”

Let’s see, pandas live alone, are sexually inept and watch porn. In what significant way do they differ from the typical AoS moron? If they had opposable thumbs they be commenting here all day long or more likely, one of them would wind up a co-blogger.


digg this
posted by DrewM. at 11:02 AM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
qdpsteve: "Not foist!! ..."

Grump928(C): "[i]I just found two cans of sauerkraut that is two ..."

qdpsteve: "Foist!! ..."

The Political Hat: "Progressive Utopia: Fake Science; Evil Words; Auth ..."

penguin with ice cream on his face: "[i]I'm sealed on the Privy[/i]Interesting. ..."

qdpsteve: "Bertram: will the commercial feature Ted Nugent?? ..."

Skandia Recluse: "Posted by: Skandia Recluse at October 19, 2017 09: ..."

Pug Mahon, Gentleman Drunkard: "Looking like a Yankees-Dodgers series. YYYAAAAA ..."

Bertram Cabot, Jr.: " [i]Just saw a commercial for Abby's...venison sa ..."

Aetius451AD Work Laptop: "Murdering millions of people from ideological hatr ..."

boulder terlit hobo: "here's Macc Lads for the 'nettes - https://www. ..."

W. J. Clinton: "[i]How bulgy is the can? Posted by: Bitter Clinge ..."

Recent Entries
Search


MuNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat
Archives
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64