Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!



Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups






















« Dutch Fret As Women's Breasts Get Larger | Main | Cheney To Be Witness For Scooter Libby's Defense »
December 19, 2006

Vandals Stab Family's Frosty The Snowman To Death For The Third Time

With video. A hidden camera was installed, and one vandal, Robert Snell, was caught after the third time. (No footage of that, alas.)

family in Ohio was prey to holiday vandals recently. Their lawn decorations were attacked by neighborhood scrooges.

The holiday grinches have been knocking the wind out of frosty.

A hidden camera caught two people stabbing repeatedly an inflatable snowman.

...

Williquette has seen this happen twice before in the last three weeks, "They slashed him there and they also got him in the head twice."

Inside Frosty's mangled torso; Matt found a screwdriver and footprints on the nylon.

"Mangled torso." Heh.

...

Isaac Lindquist says, "It was terrible, real terrible. They are the nicest people and I can't imagine why anybody would be after them specifically."

I don't know if they're after the family so much as if they're after Frosty, who pretty much everyone hates.

Frosty the Snowman was always the weak link in the children's Santa-Rudolph-Frosty fantasy. Santa-- well, you bought into him without question. Flying reindeer were harder to believe, but if Santa was to make all those deliveries in one long night, he'd need a magical transport, right?

But Frosty? A talking frigging snowman animated by a stage magician's hat? That one even stupid kids gagged on. And it made them question Santa.

I know I personally found out Santa wasn't real when I questioned the Frosty the Snowman bullshit. I just wanted my Mom to confirm this idiotic snow-golem was fake, but she took the opportunity to also tell me Santa wasn't real either.

Santa? Santa? Santa's not real?!?

I underwent this trauma all because of my strong doubts about Frosty the Abominable Snowjob. Slightly less plausible than even the Tooth Fairy. (And no one cared if the Tooth Fairy was real or not anyway.)

Good riddance to bad slush.

Thanks to Dan Riehl.

Also check out Kofi Annan, a corrupt millionaire in his own right, and married to a very wealthy Sweidsh heiress, conniving to retain his government-subsidized apartment while poor people in NY are on a four-year wait-list for such housing.

Question: If you discovered the Horrible Truth from your parents, they probably told you not to tell other kids, to let other kids live with their fantasies, and let their own parents tell them.

Did you? Or did go out there and evangelize for Santa Atheism?

I did the latter. It was just too juicy.

I only wish I'd had a blog at that age. The flaming skull would have been up for the MSM (Mainstream Mom) Santa Lie. I would have started the 12/25 Truther movement with a documentary called "Loose Elves."

I would've got me some serious hits.


digg this
posted by Ace at 04:16 PM

| Access Comments




Recent Comments
Adriane the Fruit Pie Chart of the Month Club Critic . . .: "Rain ? ..."

Taboo family sex: "Time Extension. Hookshot Media. Archived from the ..."

Skip : "U since that 2am comment ..."

Adriane the Fruit Pie Chart of the Month Club Critic . . .: "Pawn - I’m sorry it’s a bad night. ..."

Ciampino - Russian launch: "[u]QUICK REFERENCE GUIDE TO SPACE ACTIVITY FOR NOV ..."

Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, : "Just fixin' a bagel. Posted by: RickZ at November ..."

pawn: "Thanks Adriane, I have mobility issues and a ba ..."

RickZ: "Just fixin' a bagel. ..."

Adriane the Fruit Pie Chart of the Month Club Critic . . .: "I would suggest a warm soak to at least relax the ..."

pawn: "Damn, still can't sleep. Dreading work tomorrow ..."

Biden's Dog sniffs a whole lotta malarkey, : "Guess I am only one here Posted by: Skip at Novem ..."

Puddleglum, cheer up for the worst is yet to come: "Nope. I'm lurking about Skip. I nodded off in the ..."

Recent Entries
Search


Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
Powered by
Movable Type 2.64