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June 21, 2006

Hee, Hee: ABCNews Asks For Emails Re: How Global Warming Is Affecting Your Life

Well, that's some objective news reportage. Put out a call for self-selecting global-warming alarmists to spin their wildest fables.

Witnessing the impact of global warming in your life?

ABC News wants to hear from you. We're currently producing a report on the increasing changes in our physical environment, and are looking for interesting examples of people coping with the differences in their daily lives. Has your life been directly affected by global warming?

We want to hear and see your stories. Have you noticed changes in your own backyard or hometown? The differences can be large or small — altered blooming schedules, unusual animals that have arrived in your community, higher water levels encroaching on your property.

Show us what you've seen. You can include video material of the environmental change, or simply tell your story via webcam. Please fill out the form below, and be sure to include captions or other descriptive information if you're sending video. We hope to hear from you. Thank you.

Thanks to JoeJoe for the tip.

If you're so moved, dash off an email describing your own global-warming woes, like how your girlfriend never has an orgasm due to thickening "greenhouse gases," and post it here.

I just sent them an email of my own global warming horror story. Minor content warning.


Not that it matters, but I really sent it. I don't expect to be on 20/20 anytime soon, though.

Global Warming Is Making My Balls Rambunctious

All this global warming is making my balls hot and sweaty. Don't get me wrong; they used to be warm and moist, but now it's like a frigging Swedish sauna down there, except with balls instead of old Jewish men.

Actually, my balls sort of look like old Jewish men, but that's my own cross to bear.

Bush should be impeached from turning my once environmentally-balaced
testicular ecoystem into a dangerously fetid wetlands, full of disease and stinging insects and, of course, balls.

digg this
posted by Ace at 02:25 PM

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