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Recent Entries
A Few Good ONTs
Question Time Cafe
Another Jihadist Stabbing Attack in Germany, This Time at the Berlin Holocaust Museum
Julie Kelly: Meet New #Resistance Hero Denise Cheung
Hollywood Hits Peak Woke/Broke as Captain America Projected to See Huge 70% Second-Weekend Dropoff After Flop Opening
Trump Tells Maine's Woke Governess: If You Continue Letting Men Beat the Shit Out of Girls In Sport, I'm Cutting Every Dollar of Federal Funding
Jasmine Crockett, Who Is Absolutely On Trump's Payroll, Announces That She Will Block Trump's Plan to Give Taxpayers $5,000 Out of the Money DOGE Saves, Because $5,000 Doesn't Mean Anything to US Citizens
AG Pam Bondi Informs the Senate That Their Restrictions on Who the President Can Fire Are Unconstitutional and That the Administration Will Ignore Them
Media Blames MAGA Trump-Fan Racists For Stabbing Death of Lesbian Fire Chief
Plot Twist: The Suspect Is the Lesbain Fire Chief's Wife, Who, Get This, Was Previously Imprisoned for Stabbing Her Husband to Death
THE MORNING RANT: Taxpayer-Subsidized “Clean Tech” Ventures in Support of the “EV Transition” Are Starting to Fold
Question Time Cafe
Another Jihadist Stabbing Attack in Germany, This Time at the Berlin Holocaust Museum
Julie Kelly: Meet New #Resistance Hero Denise Cheung
Hollywood Hits Peak Woke/Broke as Captain America Projected to See Huge 70% Second-Weekend Dropoff After Flop Opening
Trump Tells Maine's Woke Governess: If You Continue Letting Men Beat the Shit Out of Girls In Sport, I'm Cutting Every Dollar of Federal Funding
Jasmine Crockett, Who Is Absolutely On Trump's Payroll, Announces That She Will Block Trump's Plan to Give Taxpayers $5,000 Out of the Money DOGE Saves, Because $5,000 Doesn't Mean Anything to US Citizens
AG Pam Bondi Informs the Senate That Their Restrictions on Who the President Can Fire Are Unconstitutional and That the Administration Will Ignore Them
Media Blames MAGA Trump-Fan Racists For Stabbing Death of Lesbian Fire Chief
Plot Twist: The Suspect Is the Lesbain Fire Chief's Wife, Who, Get This, Was Previously Imprisoned for Stabbing Her Husband to Death
THE MORNING RANT: Taxpayer-Subsidized “Clean Tech” Ventures in Support of the “EV Transition” Are Starting to Fold
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups
« John Bolton's moustache shows up on time for all UN meetings |
Main
| Gee, I Wonder If His Parents Are Liberals »
Welcome to Starbucks, what can I get for you?
I'd like a large coffee, please.
We don't have large, sir.
No large? What sort of Nazi establishment are you running here?
It's just that we...
This is an outrage! You might as well replace that rather bizarre logo of yours with a swastika.
Well, it's not that we don't have large coffees, we just don't call them 'large'.
I see, you're trying subjugate the black man by taking away his ability to communicate. Why, you're no more than the Taliban of gourmet coffee establishments.
No, we just have our own names. We have tall...
That's what I want. I'll have a tall coffee.
Actually, tall is small.
Tall is small? What kind of 1984 doublespeak is that?
Then we have grande...
Well, I know from my interaction with my proud Hispanic brothers, from whom this country stole so much of what they now call the Southwestern United States, that grande is Spanish for big, so I'll have a grande.
Well, grande is not large here at Starbucks.
I should have known. First you take their land, then you unilaterally change their language, thereby forcing them to...
I'm sorry, sir, but we're very busy, so I need to know what you want, and if you want a Starbucks bonus card.
And just what exactly is a Starbucks bonus card? I suppose it's something you use to gather personal information on your unsuspecting customers so that you can help the fascist Bush administration spy on innocent citizens who may or may not be calling acquaintances in Kabul or Baghdad.
No, sir, not at all. If you get a bonus card and buy five venti drinks - that's what we call large here; venti - we'll give you the sixth one free.
Free?
Free.
Well, why didn't you say so? I'll have a triple venti no-foam soy latte with room.
Right away, sir.
And give me one of those low-fat blueberry-apricot muffins, too. They look Nazi.
What?
I mean yummy. Sorry, force of habit.
OK, one triple venti no-foam say latte with room, and a low-fat blueberry-apricot muffin. That'll be $6.45...Out of twenty. Here's your change, and here's your bonus card.
Thanks. Have a Nazi day!
You too, sir.
Welcome to Starbucks, can I help you?
Jes, three grande coffees, por favor.
I should have called in sick.
Related: Dafydd delivers a smackdown that blisters like a hot Caramel Macchiato.
February 03, 2006
Julian Bond Takes On The Starbucks Fascistocracy
Welcome to Starbucks, what can I get for you?
I'd like a large coffee, please.
We don't have large, sir.
No large? What sort of Nazi establishment are you running here?
It's just that we...
This is an outrage! You might as well replace that rather bizarre logo of yours with a swastika.
Well, it's not that we don't have large coffees, we just don't call them 'large'.
I see, you're trying subjugate the black man by taking away his ability to communicate. Why, you're no more than the Taliban of gourmet coffee establishments.
No, we just have our own names. We have tall...
That's what I want. I'll have a tall coffee.
Actually, tall is small.
Tall is small? What kind of 1984 doublespeak is that?
Then we have grande...
Well, I know from my interaction with my proud Hispanic brothers, from whom this country stole so much of what they now call the Southwestern United States, that grande is Spanish for big, so I'll have a grande.
Well, grande is not large here at Starbucks.
I should have known. First you take their land, then you unilaterally change their language, thereby forcing them to...
I'm sorry, sir, but we're very busy, so I need to know what you want, and if you want a Starbucks bonus card.
And just what exactly is a Starbucks bonus card? I suppose it's something you use to gather personal information on your unsuspecting customers so that you can help the fascist Bush administration spy on innocent citizens who may or may not be calling acquaintances in Kabul or Baghdad.
No, sir, not at all. If you get a bonus card and buy five venti drinks - that's what we call large here; venti - we'll give you the sixth one free.
Free?
Free.
Well, why didn't you say so? I'll have a triple venti no-foam soy latte with room.
Right away, sir.
And give me one of those low-fat blueberry-apricot muffins, too. They look Nazi.
What?
I mean yummy. Sorry, force of habit.
OK, one triple venti no-foam say latte with room, and a low-fat blueberry-apricot muffin. That'll be $6.45...Out of twenty. Here's your change, and here's your bonus card.
Thanks. Have a Nazi day!
You too, sir.
Welcome to Starbucks, can I help you?
Jes, three grande coffees, por favor.
I should have called in sick.
Related: Dafydd delivers a smackdown that blisters like a hot Caramel Macchiato.
Recent Comments
COMountainMarie :
"I know...I better go now....I never make it on the ..."
Miklos leart hisself: "Ike pulling up Arleigh Burke for CNO. Posted by: ..."
seo per psicologi genova: "I take pleasure in, lead to I found just what I us ..."
Teresa in Fort Worth, Plucky Comic Relief, AoS Ladies Brigade - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn.: "[I]296 And another one. Remember those claims that ..."
Rodrigo Borgia: "> You end up slathered in margarine Posted by: Mi ..."
Emmie celebrates the Audacity of Trump!: "Thanks, Publius. ..."
JackStraw: "Payback has got to be in top 3 emotions. Maybe 2. ..."
Tammy-al Thor: "don't think records dating from the Austro-Hungari ..."
rhomboid: "And in the same fell swoop, the replacement for th ..."
learn languages with netflix: "It's a shame you don't have a donate button! I'd w ..."
Miklos is Nice and does not attempt to fool Mother Nature: "Fucking with Mother Nature does not work out well ..."
publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " And another one. Remember those claims that HC ..."
Miklos leart hisself: "Ike pulling up Arleigh Burke for CNO. Posted by: ..."
seo per psicologi genova: "I take pleasure in, lead to I found just what I us ..."
Teresa in Fort Worth, Plucky Comic Relief, AoS Ladies Brigade - Eat the Cheesecake, Buy the Yarn.: "[I]296 And another one. Remember those claims that ..."
Rodrigo Borgia: "> You end up slathered in margarine Posted by: Mi ..."
Emmie celebrates the Audacity of Trump!: "Thanks, Publius. ..."
JackStraw: "Payback has got to be in top 3 emotions. Maybe 2. ..."
Tammy-al Thor: "don't think records dating from the Austro-Hungari ..."
rhomboid: "And in the same fell swoop, the replacement for th ..."
learn languages with netflix: "It's a shame you don't have a donate button! I'd w ..."
Miklos is Nice and does not attempt to fool Mother Nature: "Fucking with Mother Nature does not work out well ..."
publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " And another one. Remember those claims that HC ..."
Recent Entries
A Few Good ONTs
Question Time Cafe
Another Jihadist Stabbing Attack in Germany, This Time at the Berlin Holocaust Museum
Julie Kelly: Meet New #Resistance Hero Denise Cheung
Hollywood Hits Peak Woke/Broke as Captain America Projected to See Huge 70% Second-Weekend Dropoff After Flop Opening
Trump Tells Maine's Woke Governess: If You Continue Letting Men Beat the Shit Out of Girls In Sport, I'm Cutting Every Dollar of Federal Funding
Jasmine Crockett, Who Is Absolutely On Trump's Payroll, Announces That She Will Block Trump's Plan to Give Taxpayers $5,000 Out of the Money DOGE Saves, Because $5,000 Doesn't Mean Anything to US Citizens
AG Pam Bondi Informs the Senate That Their Restrictions on Who the President Can Fire Are Unconstitutional and That the Administration Will Ignore Them
Media Blames MAGA Trump-Fan Racists For Stabbing Death of Lesbian Fire Chief
Plot Twist: The Suspect Is the Lesbain Fire Chief's Wife, Who, Get This, Was Previously Imprisoned for Stabbing Her Husband to Death
THE MORNING RANT: Taxpayer-Subsidized “Clean Tech” Ventures in Support of the “EV Transition” Are Starting to Fold
Question Time Cafe
Another Jihadist Stabbing Attack in Germany, This Time at the Berlin Holocaust Museum
Julie Kelly: Meet New #Resistance Hero Denise Cheung
Hollywood Hits Peak Woke/Broke as Captain America Projected to See Huge 70% Second-Weekend Dropoff After Flop Opening
Trump Tells Maine's Woke Governess: If You Continue Letting Men Beat the Shit Out of Girls In Sport, I'm Cutting Every Dollar of Federal Funding
Jasmine Crockett, Who Is Absolutely On Trump's Payroll, Announces That She Will Block Trump's Plan to Give Taxpayers $5,000 Out of the Money DOGE Saves, Because $5,000 Doesn't Mean Anything to US Citizens
AG Pam Bondi Informs the Senate That Their Restrictions on Who the President Can Fire Are Unconstitutional and That the Administration Will Ignore Them
Media Blames MAGA Trump-Fan Racists For Stabbing Death of Lesbian Fire Chief
Plot Twist: The Suspect Is the Lesbain Fire Chief's Wife, Who, Get This, Was Previously Imprisoned for Stabbing Her Husband to Death
THE MORNING RANT: Taxpayer-Subsidized “Clean Tech” Ventures in Support of the “EV Transition” Are Starting to Fold
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George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
Integrity SAT's: Entrance Exam for Paul Anka's Band
AllahPundit's Paul Anka 45's Collection
AnkaPundit: Paul Anka Takes Over the Site for a Weekend (Continues through to Monday's postings)
George Bush Slices Don Rumsfeld Like an F*ckin' Hammer
Top Top Tens
Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
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Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up
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NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell
Greatest Hitjobs
The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)