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February 02, 2006

John Bolton's moustache shows up on time for all UN meetings

John Bolton's moustache presided over its first UN Security Council meeting and left with split ends after it became readily apparent that the rest of the Security Council members were out for the all-important double shot espresso:

"I brought the gavel down at 10. I was the only one in the room," Bolton said. The United States has just assumed the rotating presidency of the 15-nation council for the month of February.

"I believe in discipline. I think daily briefings constitute a form of intellectual discipline. Starting on time is a form of discipline," Bolton told reporters. "I failed today."

"I took a list of when they (council members) came in," Bolton said. "We started just before 10:15."

As part of a plan to modernize council operations, Bolton proposed that ambassadors gather daily at 10 a.m. for a briefing on the latest global political and peacekeeping developments.

Nothing says "modern" like showing up to stuff when you're expected to.

I am happy to know that John Bolton's moustache will not tolerate slipshoddery when it comes to matters of international peacekeeping. Hopefully, when Iran gets the bomb, they'll put down the damn espresso and get there on time.


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posted by Feisty at 11:21 PM

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