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December 15, 2005

King Kong Can't Crack $10 Mil Opening Night

Hmmm... Lion wins?

Despite the first-night box disappointment, the Washington Post reports that giant apes are determined to make this a box-office success:

Then a herd mentality started to sink in, like a giant ape church praying at the altar of "King Kong." There's a countdown on BigMonkey.com ("It's finally here!"), E-vites are landing in in-boxes ("Let's watch it together!"), and blogs are keeping tabs on the film's awards, including yesterday's Golden Globe nominations. The message is: If you're a self-respecting giant ape with a thing for willowy blondes, you had better get in line -- as so many did this past weekend....

"This is our giant-gorilla 'Mighty Joe Young,' " said Might Joe Young, a spokesman for the Giant Rampaging Ape Anti-Defamation League (GRAAD-L)...

Look, I don't care how important this is to Andrew Sullivan, straight males just have a problem with any simian with genitals the size of a beer truck.

Except for Dick Cheney, of course. But that's a given.


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posted by Ace at 05:04 PM

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