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March 05, 2005

Michelle Malkin Does a Top Ten

The top ten egregious journalistic violations Dan Rather committed that David Letterman ought to have asked about, but did not.

Via Joust the Facts, who has excerpts of the softball interview that actually occurred, and links to the full transcript if you can bear it.

Joust the Facts is a little annoyed that the main topics of discussion were the "independent" panel's "findings" that there was no evidence of political bias at CBS, and that no one can "prove" the documents are fake (except, of course, for the forensic expert cited in Appendix 4 of the panel's own report).

A "push," Letterman called it.


Can't wait for his next interview with Hillary Clinton. I'm hoping he'll ask her some really tough, probing questions, like "How do you manage, with your busy schedule as a Senator, advocate, and devoted wife, to insure that the sun rises every day and the stars remain e'er fixed in the firmament?"

More Bashing of Letterman... Beyond the jump, with a good (but reposted) Top Ten.

Letterman was once a hero to me, a curmudgeon with a style of hip-but-dorky irony that influenced my own sense of humor more than just about anyone else in the world.

But I've pretty much had it with him. It seems to be overreacting to write someone off simply on the basis of their politics; but in fact there's more to it than that. Letterman just hasn't been very funny since, oh, I'd say the last year of his stint at NBC.

I hate to say it, but I now think Jay Leno actually does a better show. Or at least the comedy bits of his show are better. Leno still can't manage a decent interview, possibly because he's a little weird as regards social interaction and processing information, and possibly because he can't even fake interest in what his celebrity guest morons have to say.

Which, I gotta say, I can't blame him for.

I swore off reposting old material after my Blogoversary, but I just can't help myself. Letterman sucks, and here's why.

Top Ten Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore

10. Recent Stupid Pet Tricks include "Sit," "Shake hands," and "Hump the Leg"

9. Has become so jaded he demands that at least one guest per show get up on his desk and perform a striptease; last week's show with Nathan Lane was particularly uncomfortable

8. Old Letterman comedy staple: puckish irony;
New Letterman comedy staple: nonstop racial slurs

7. To amuse himself during interviews, has begun playing drinking games; drinks when someone calls a director "generous," chugs when someone says "This script really spoke to me"

6. Wardrobe for show has degenerated into nothing but baggy sweatpants and "Who Farted?" T-shirts

5. Features a new twenty-minute segment in middle of every show called "Dave's Quiet Time," in which audience members are asked to "pursue independent reading" or "engage in quiet group-study"

4. Questions to celebrity guests sound suspiciously similar to clues to the day's New York Times crossword puzzle

3. Last Thursday's "show" was nothing but a taped teleconference with his tax lawyers, interspersed with "wacky" sound effects and still photos of Larry "Bud" Melman

2. Standard end-of-show sign-off, "You've been great! Drive safely!" replaced with ominous-sounding "Another hour nearer the sweet embrace of blissful death"

... and the Number One Sign That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore...

1. He's "really looking forward to" his next-scheduled bout of pink-eye

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posted by Ace at 08:13 AM

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