Pedro Pascal Knows Exactly How to Advertise a Boy's Science Fantasy Movie: Kissing a Man on the Lips on National TV

Chris Gore wrote that Disney changing Star Wars (and Marvel) from a boys brand to a girls brand was the costliest mistake in entertainment history.

But they didn't change it to a girls brand.

They changed it to a gay brand.

What this says to me is that they know The Mandalorian and Grogu is going to be an absolute bomb and either don't care any more or are looking to pre-emptively make excuses for the disaster. "The public is just too homophobic to accept a gay space bounty hunter!"

In more next-level marketing, Disney has decided that they should allow the fired, disgraced failure Kaffeine Kennedy to remind the public that she is responsible for this movie.

No wonder the movie is tracking at the same level that Soylo: A Soy Wars Soyry tracked at before becoming the first Star Wars movie in history to lose money.

But the gay leftwing media is reassuring the public: Don't worry, this movie won't make much money, but Disney foresaw that, so they cheaped out in making it.

Various projections have the upcoming LucasFilm production earning over $80 million in its domestic opener, compared to the $84 million that 2018's Solo: A Star Wars Story made on its way to being a massive flop for the franchise. That would indeed be concerning, at least on the surface. However, the reported budget for The Mandalorian movie is far more frugal than expected and reveals that Disney is smartly trimming the fat where it can.

Knowing that the movie was shot entirely in the Volume to save money will make my moviegoing experience all the richer. Consume product, get excited for next product.

Unfunny Blackface Performer Jimmy Kimmel is meanwhile astounded that Disney hasn't fired his money-losing ass yet, and that makes all of us.

Even by Jimmy Kimmel's standards, it's been quite the crazy ride for ABC's late-night host since he was last on stage in New York for a Disney upfront presentation.

"Have to admit, I've been through so much bullsh*t this year, it actually made me appreciate this bullsh*t," the upfronts veteran told Disney brass, stars and assembled ad buyers Tuesday at this year's gathering at the Javitz Center.

Which is why the self-described "bad boy of data and measurement solutions" added today, "I cost our company a lot of money this year, billions."

Introduced by Ryan Seacrest, Kimmel hit the stage today to big applause and unsheathed his satire swords fast, furious and funny. "It is very possible that no employee in the history of any company has cost their employer more," he said right at the drop. "Hiring me 24 years ago, just from a purely mathematical standpoint, was the worst personnel decision that Disney Corporation has ever made. Not even the captain of the Exxon Valdez did more damage."

They say that "jokes" are funny if they have a sound basis in accounting and mathematics, which this one does. So Jimmy Kimmel was finally "funny" in stating the truth.

posted by Disinformation Expert Ace at 05:40 PM

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