Wednesday Night ONT - May 13, 2026 [TRex]

Good evening Horde. The time has come for mid-week shenanigans. The bar is open.

Welcome to the Wednesday night ONT which means another edition of random overnight fun and games. Pull up a chair and sit a spell. Good will offerings of amusing puns are happily accepted. Pants are optional. Be nice to your fellow commenters and AoS contributors. This is a Tucker, Candace and Megyn free zone. Please.

Will you be smarter after reading this ONT? Will you be better looking? Will you be more fun at parties? Will you lose weight? Will you be wealthier? Will you be more fashionable? If you skip the content, you'll never know!

[Top photo: Billy Mays is buried in Mt. Cavalry cemetery in McKees Rocks, Pittsburgh]

How often does marketing transcend merely selling things and becomes entertainment? Rarely, but when it happens, it becomes a part of our common cultural fabric.

Billy Mays starts us off this evening. Wikipedia lists over 40 products that Billy pitched, but OxiClean is the most well known (which explains the cleaning products left at his headstone).

Here is an unofficial list of other Billy Mays products. Do you know or remember any? Did you buy any based on his pitch?

OxiClean - a versatile stain remover and laundry booster

Orange Glo - A wood floor cleaner and polish

Kaboom - A tile, grout, and bathroom cleaner

Zorbeez - A highly absorbent chamois-style cloth for spills and cleaning.

Mighty Putty - An epoxy putty for fixing almost anything with an "everlasting bond."

Mighty Mendit - A fabric bonding agent for quick clothing repairs without sewing

Awesome Auger - A powerful gardening/drill attachment for digging holes.

Big City Slider Station - A mini-burger press and cooker

Ding King - A DIY dent and ding remover for cars

Hercules Hook - Heavy-duty wall hooks for hanging items easily.

Impact Gel - Shock-absorbing shoe insoles

Billy Mays did not pitch Shamwow (Billy's product Zorbeez was similar). Shamwow was pitched by Vince Offer:

George Foreman tells the story of his grill. He made a lot of money.

Is Ron Popeil the godfather of the infomercial?

Ron was the son of inventor Samuel Popeil, creator of the Chop-o-Matic food chopper and its more famous offspring, the Veg-o-Matic food chopper and slicer.

Ron Popeil began his career in the 1950s by selling those and other kitchen gadgets in live demonstrations at retail stores and county fairs.

Contrary to what many people believe, he did not say "It slices! It dices!" in the Veg-o-Matic commercials. Where did that phrase come from? Some print ads for the Veg-o-Matic said product "slices and dices and juliennes to perfection." (No, I don't know what "juliennes" means." Maybe they know on the food thread.)

The interweb says the first TV infomercial in the US was arguably in 1949 when Vitamix founder W.G. "Papa" Bernard created and aired a 30-minute demonstration for the Vitamix blender. It ran on WOR-TV in New York in a late Sat/early Sun overnight time slot. It was highly successful.

Early long-form ads were limited because of strict FCC regulations from the 1950s-1960s that capped advertising time per hour and discouraged "program-length commercials" to protect the public from excessive selling.

In 1984, the FCC deregulated television advertising which kicked off the age of the infomercial. Stations could air as much commercial time as they wanted. Program-length commercials became common, especially in cheap late-night and early-morning slots. This filled unsold airtime profitably for broadcasters while giving direct-response marketers a long-form platform to demonstrate products in detail.

And now you know...

Susanne Somers sold the Thighmaster:

Fess up: how many of you have a Thighmaster in your attic or basement?

Sy Sperling: "I'm not only the hair club president, but I'm also a client."

Phil Swift for Flex TAPE:

These aren't infomercials, but I had to include the Clapper and Snuggie:

We could do a whole segment on QVC and HSN (someday, but not today). My favorite trivia nugget of QVC history is the fact that a young Mike Rowe got his break into TV through late night QVC.

In 1990, Rowe was an opera singer in Baltimore with no TV experience. He crashed an open audition for QVC hosts at a local hotel and was hired on the spot for the overnight shift.

Mike Rowe on QVC is stream of consciousness irreverent improv comedy. Safe to say he was unlike other QVC hosts which made him perfect for the overnight hours. He was fired and re-hired three times before leaving on his own in 1993.

"I can't believe they invented it!"

You didn't think the ONT would miss Gallagher's Sledge-O-Matic, did you?

The Pittsburgh police scanner keeps giving. Thank you people of Pittsburgh!

Jon Lajoie for the big on-topic ONT finish:

Written correspondence can be sent to moronhobbies at protonmail dot com. Are you lurking ?? Does anyone read the disclaimer? Does anyone click on the lurking link? Is everyone whelmed?

posted by Open Blogger at 10:00 PM

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