Saturday Night Club ONT - January 24, 2026 [Double Trouble]

Welcome to Club ONT - A Double Shot of Double Trouble from The Disco and The Dino.

Worried about snow? We're not! Club's open and ready to serve. Just please stomp your boots a few times on the mat before coming in, OK?

Are you on weather watch? Share your local weather reports. Snow? Ice? Sleet? Rain? Sunshine?

Saturday Night Jokes and Other Funnies

A trucker walked into a roadside diner and said to the new waitress, "I'll have three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a set of running boards."

The waitress blinked. Once. Twice. Certainly something wasn't right.

She rushed into the kitchen and whispered to the cook, "There is a guy out there trying to order car parts for breakfast!"

The cook laughed. "Relax!
Flat tires are pancakes.
Headlights are eggs.
Running boards are bacon."

Relieved, the waitress put the order together and added a bowl of beans before heading back out to the trucker.

The trucker smiled when he saw the plate but frowned when he saw the bowl of beans. "What are the beans for?"

The waitress smiled proudly and said, "Well, I figured you're getting flat tires, headlights and running boards. While you're here, you might as well gas up too!"

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Drink of the Night

Finishing out the fours in our deck of playing card cocktails

Given the reputation of Key West as a haven for a certain segment of the population, one might think a "Key West Margarita" may have an alternate meaning. The Club does not want to know!

Club ONT Department of Science

Doggo - confirm or deny?

Dogs defecate in accordance with earth's magnetic field, research finds

Now, a team of 12 scientists from universities in Germany and the Czech Republic have come together in a unique study that observed 37 breeds of dog over a two-year period.

Exactly 1,893 defecations and 5,582 urinations later, the team reach one incredible finding: "dogs preferred to excrete with the body being aligned along the north-south axis."

Dogs join cattle, roe deer, red deer, hunting red foxes, red foxes, coyotes and grey wolves as yet another mammal to have a mechanism of "magnetoreception."

Although their altered behaviour was only evident under calm conditions, it's still a breakthrough in demonstrating measurable, predictable changes in dog behaviour in response to the earth's magnetic field.

Club ONT Department of Fine Cinema

Club ONT Performance art

Club ONT Music

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Whelming creatures

Club ONT is not responsible for the condition of the parking lot. Slips, trips, and falls will be met with laughter followed by the requisite "Are you OK?" The Moose sees everything but does not shovel snow. We do not have jumper cables or extra ice scrapers. We do recommend back-in style parking and leaving your windshield wipers up. Growler fills are half-price when ordered using our app. Kitchen will close without notice. No refunds for orders not fulfilled.

posted by Open Blogger at 10:00 PM

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