Is This Something?

Candidates for "something" below.

Here's a bit of decent Hollywood news: The critics attempted to tank the new horror video-game adaptation movie Five Nights at Freddy's despite it being, from what I hear, pretty good, for a kid-oriented PG-13 horror movie. Woke critics gave it 30% positive; actual audiences rated it a little higher -- 88% positive.

They gave the movie incredibly bad reviews because the creator... voted for Trump has has donated to other Republicans.

But guess what?

Universal Studios' film adaptation of Five Nights at Freddy's scared up a monster box office after the original creator Scott Cawthon refused to apologize to a woke cancel mob over his political donations to politicians such as Donald Trump and Tulsi Gabbard.

(from left) Bonnie, Freddy Fazbear and Chica in Five Nights at Freddy's, directed by Emma Tammi.

According to The-Numbers, the film banked an estimated $78 million domestically in its opening weekend despite having a day and date release on the streaming service Peacock.

Not only did the film gross $78 million domestically, but it pulled in another $52.5 million internationally for a global gross of $130.5 million.

The film reportedly had a budget of $20 million according to Deadline's Anthony D'Alessandro.

With a budget of only $20 million, the film's break even point theatrically was $50 million. Given the $78 million haul domestically, it's clear the film has made quite a bit of cash for not only Universal, but production company Blumhouse.

It's free on Peacock right now -- it was debuted on Peacock and in theaters simultaneously -- but still racked up huge box office because the videogame is popular with kids and, as I said, supposedly it's not bad.

The premise is that kids are trapped in a Chuck-E-Cheese knockoff called "Freddy's" and then are stalked by the animatronic characters that sing and dance in the restaurant. That may sound familiar, because Willy's Wonderland had the same premise, as did the horror reboot of The Banana Splits (yes that's real, I saw it -- turrible). But actually both of those movies were ripoffs of the Five Night at Freddy's video game. The movie version of Freddy's just took a little extra time to make it to the screen.

If I can work a quick Disney Disaster mention in -- there is a fair chance that this tiny-budgeted horror movie about animatronic bunnies and mice beats The Marvels' opening weekend, despite this being simultanteously premiered on TV, for free (with subscription, I mean).

On to the possibly somethings. You choose which are something and which are nothing. But keep it civil -- and no betting and no weapons.

So it's Romancing the Stone + Three Days of the Condor? Was it Three Days of the Condor where they read spy novels to find potential hints for real-life operations, but discovered something no one was supposed to know? Or which movie was that? (It's bugging me, if you can remember, let me know.) (Confirmed, it was Three Days of the Condor.)

Kind of the right moment for this:

Is this something? If you doubt Gosling's ability to play this kind of character, you must not have seen, somehow, the best action-comedy of the past ten years, The Nice Guys. He's great in that as a zero-ethics low-skill injury-prone detective.

Gosling isn't afraid to go full Lou Costello, when the performance demands it.

I think it's something -- but the music. Gaah.

Not even a nod to the original theme.

Update: MAGA Ken says the Beekeeper with Crank Transporter looks good.

I like Statham, but I haven't bothered to watch one of his movies since the bait-and-switch movie The Killer Elite, which just paid for that title and slapped it on to a completely different story. I think the real title of that movie, before buying the rights to use The Killer Elite, was "The Feathermen."

I get it, that's not the greatest title, and The Killer Elite is a great title, but... truth in advertising, fellas.

posted by Disinformation Expert Ace at 04:20 PM

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