The ONT's Might Is Greater Than Human, And It's Arm Is Very Long*

Happy Thursday everyone. Anyone got any plans for the weekend?

Gotta Catch 'Em All

This amused me:

It amused me because I frequently use Pokémon names instead of real medication names when talking to clients about their heath history. “Are you currently taking any medications for that? Like Rosalia or Cyndaquil?” Nobody's caught on yet. How did you do on the quiz?

Answers: (highlight to reveal) 1, 3, 7, 10, 11, 12, 13, 15, 17, and 18 are Pokémon

What Were They Thinking?

9/11 parade float with smoking towers slammed as ‘tasteless’

I see that they put a lot of work into the float. And yes, from a purely technical standpoint it is quite impressive. But still, I find it hard to imagine that at some point in the process, someone didn't turn to their neighbor and go “Uh, Bob? I think this may be a bit beyond the pale”. Then again, it was a GOP group that built it, they are quite adept at being tone deaf.

Norm Would Have Been Proud

The story is nothing much, a celebrity squabbling with Twitter over censorship. JJ mentioned it in his morning report today.

Nicki Minaj says she was put in ‘Twitter jail’ over COVID-19 vaccine tweets

Not something I would normally pay attention to, but then I saw this tweet, and it is such a perfect, spot on, pitch perfect, Norm McDonald impression that I have to believe his ghost paused for one more bon mot before ascending to the pearly gates:

RIP Norm. You were one of a kind.

You Think Your Internet Is Slow?

Pferd gegen Internet: Wer bringt Daten schneller?

Now, the article is in German, which I don't speak, so if it turns out to be about Cartman's mom doing scheisse porn don't blame me, but I asked a friend who speaks German to translate, and he told me that it said the internet is painfully slow in some parts of Germany, so they did an experiment. They attempted to transmit a 4.5 GB file 10 km over the local network, while at the same time giving a copy of the file to a man on a horse. The horseman delivered the file, 10 km away, and returned, before the file finished downloading. Makes SuddenLink look like light speed.

Why I'm Glad I Don't Live In Baltimore Anymore

Man charged after carjacking outside Timonium Shoprite

My mom lives in that neighborhood, and is about that woman's age. She shops at that store sometimes. I called her when I read this to make sure it wasn't her.

It wasn't, thank God, and thankfully the lady involved is going to be alright, but this is the nice suburban area I grew up in. Of course, the city built a Light Rail train right through the neighborhood to downtown, and helpfully connected it with the crosstown subway that goes through West Baltimore, so you can get from The Wire to The Brady Bunch for a couple of bucks, but I'm sure that's just a coincidence.

R. M. Huffman Is Writing For The Russians Again

Obesity is a killer and Covid is brutal to fat people, so why are we doing nothing to tackle this ticking time bomb?

He makes a good point. A shame he has to go to RT to make it.

Thursday Quiz

How about it Morons? Which class are you?

T.W.I.P.

When I was a kid I used to watch T.W.I.B. (This Week In Baseball, pronounced “twib”. Is that still a thing?), this is Larry Correia's column This Week in Politics – It’s all Bullshit and we’re Fucked. I agree with every word of it.

Progs like to blather on about the “social contract” but that’s a one-way street. We owe them everything. They don’t owe us shit. A black republican gets called “boy” and gets eggs thrown at him by a lady in an actual fucking gorilla mask and there’s crickets while a black liberal sees a garage tie and there’s an emergency FBI special investigation into the racist hatemongery of NASCAR. There’s one right wing protest and it’s an insurrection that requires 35,000 troops and endless fucking pearl clutching freak outs, but a Bernie Bro shoots republican congressmen at a baseball game and it’s like it never happened. A republican senator gets beaten and bones broken and the late-night hosts crack jokes about it. It’s why you can’t have a job and your kids suffer with miserable masks and all this abnormal anxiety causing bullshit that might emotionally scar them for life, but Barack Obama can have a birthday bash with 500 of his closest friends.

This lop-sided shit can’t last. The government doesn’t have a monopoly on force. Force got delegated to it by the people because the people trusted the government to use that force fairly. That’s the real “social contract”, and when it breaks bad things happen.

And for the fools cheering this madness on, we have this system for a reason. We have laws for a reason. We create laws the way we do for a reason. The founding fathers weren’t stupid. They were smarter than you idiots. Quit trying to gut or destroy every protection they put in place. That shit is there to protect you. But these stupid motherfuckers are not going to quit pushing until a critical mass of Americans just says fuck it and go full on Rwandan machete party.

Chunder Down Under

No Liberty? No Problem

Surprisingly, a majority of Aussies seem to support their government's attempt to permanently lock them in a plastic bubble. Not all, no, but most of them. This article explores that.

Abortion

She Did Abortions But Stopped When One Woman Said Of Her Baby, “I Just Want to Kill It”

Inspiring but tough read. When people say “God touched my heart”, this is exactly what they are talking about. Of course, the evil that men do is always present. God is willing to touch our hearts if we ask him to, but he is also willing to allow us to create hell in our own image.
Texas clinic performed 67 abortions in 17 hours with limited staff. Maybe it's just me, but if my biggest ally was the Satanic temple, I might just rethink my position.

Such A Sweet Girl

Former Washington state Democrat organizer federally convicted over terrorist attack on railroad

I'm surprised she even got charged, much less convicted.

And that's all I have in the hopper. Tonight's ONT has been brought to you by the Scots. If we didn't have 'em, we'd have to invent 'em:

*500 ampersands to the Moron who can figure out where I've been getting my title quotes from recently.

posted by WeirdDave at 10:00 PM

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