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March 21, 2020
Saturday Overnight Open Thread (3/21/20)Suddenly, a cow runs out onto the road, and a limo driving late at night, hits it head on, and the car comes to a stop. The woman in the back seat, in her usual abrasive manner, says to the Chauffeur, "You get out and check on that poor cow. You were driving." So the chauffeur gets out, checks, and reports that the animal is dead, but it appeared to be very old. Well, says the woman, "You were driving, so you go and tell the farmer in that lighted farmhouse over there." Two hours later the chauffeur returns totally inebriated, a full belly, his hair ruffled, and a big grin on his face. “My God, what happened to you?" asks the nasty woman. The chauffeur replies, "When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt scotch, the wife gave me a meal fit for a king, and the daughter made love to me." “What on earth did you say?" asks the woman. Well, I just knocked on the door, and when it opened, I said to them, "I'm Nancy Pelosi’s chauffeur, and I’ve just killed the old cow." Don’t you just love a story with a happy ending? H/T Legally Sufficient
I'm attempting to keep the Corvid-19 stories to a minimum. However, I just couldn't refrain from this meme.
Many people now stuck at home are no doubt lamenting the lack of live sports to watch. This weekend was supposed to be a big one for the motorsports world, with not one but two endurance races at that bumpy WWII airbase in Sebring, Florida, followed by F1 in Bahrain and NASCAR in Miami. Coronavirus canceled all that, but it turns out there's an audience of hungry eyeballs ready to watch racing even if it is of the esports variety.
We've all had bad days at work, amirite? I don't think your day was ever quite this bad. Mechanic ‘Accidentally’ Fires Vulcan Cannon & Obliterates F-16 Sitting on the Runway
Mum's 'home economics' coronavirus home-schooling plan has parents in stitches
ANN ARBOR, MI - A Thursday night argument between roommates over restrictions caused by coronavirus concerns escalated into fatal shooting, police said.
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